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[Singularity125]

((I've never done one of these before... let's see what happens!))

You first become aware that your head is pounding unpleasantly. Before even opening your eyes, you struggle to recollect the events of the previous evening. Everything in your memory seems to be swimming past as you attempt to grab hold of it. Only one thing is sure... you have a hell of a hangover. What did you do last night?

Wait, that's not what bothers you yet. Right now you just have to remember who you are. With some gargantuan effort you manage to piece together a few small details about your life...

Name:
Race:
Gender:
Class:
Skills [3]:
Flavor Bio (Optional):

((No limitations on these items besides the three skill limit. I don't necessarily have a ruleset defined either. C'mon, it's minimalist! Everyone gets their own character and can jump in at any time. So... let's derp!))

[Harry Baldman]

Name: Klint Bloodmurderer
Race: Human
Gender: Male
Class: Barbarian
Skills [3]: Killing Things With His Bare Hands And Teeth, Screaming, Deadly Defensive Flailing With His Obscenely Muscular Arms
Flavor Bio (Optional): Klint knows not why he is here, as he suffers from rather terrible memory loss issues. He isn't even sure his name is actually Klint Bloodmurderer, actually. It just feels like it should be. He stopped worrying about all these things ages ago, however. Now he simply lives in the moment.

[BlitzDungeoneer]

Name: Mugen Kuro
Race: Magical Fox.
Gender: Male
Class: Sorcerer
Skills: Wandless Magic(Does not require focusing instrument to cast magic)
         Dualwielding(Is quite capable at dual wielding weapons)
         Foxfire(Can create fire instantly on tails)
Flavor Bio: Mugen Kuro is an immortal magical fox, who's been alive for a little under 500 years. After training for many years in a hidden sanctuary, he became a rather competent bounty hunter, and was absurdly in tune with his magic. He constantly claims to be a Kitsune, even though he isn't.

[darkpaladin109]

Name: Jerry
Race: Booze Elemental
Gender: Male
Class: Booze Party Wizard
Skills [3]: Booze Magic, Party Tricks, Telling bad jokes
Flavor Bio (Optional): Summoned by a clown wizard for some sort of joke. Unfortunatelly, he turned out to be a really good party wizard,  upstaging his summoner easily. He now travels the world for parties to entertain children at.

[Samarkand]

Name: Food-Cookbold
Race: Kobold
Gender: Male
Class: Chef
Skills [3]: Pie Making, Meat Cooking, Butchering
Flavor Bio (Optional): Key Lime

[Beirus]

Name: Jase Bladeheart
Race: Human
Gender: Male
Class: Swordmaster
Skills [3]: Using swords, Balance, Parrying
Flavor Bio (Optional): He was a mercenary, and a half-decent one at that. He and the other members of his outfit were drinking after the completion of a rather difficult task. He sort of expected a hangover, but not such a severe one.

[Singularity125]

((So I got real into this and it looks decidedly... un-minimalistic. Oops! Shorter, crazier updates should commence after this, hopefully ))

Spoiler: Harry Baldman (click to show/hide)

You begin to remember:

Name (5): Klint Bloodmurderer.

Though you feel as though it's not your real name, you have made quite a name for yourself (literally) and you're infamous throughout the land of... wherever you are now.

Race (4): Human

Besides your grotesque strength, you're rather average for a human.

Gender (2): Male

While nobody would argue that you ARE a male -- after all, look at that manly testosterone! -- you don't particularly do a good job of attracting the ladies. Not something you worry about, though.

Class (4): Barbarian

It's obvious to all the world what you are... a crazed killer. Not the best or the worst of the lot, but you fit the role of a barbarian quite well.

Skills [3]:
(3) Killing Things With His Bare Hands And Teeth

Wait... come to think of it, you don't always pull off the "killer" part of "crazed killer". Sometimes you finish them off, but other times they're merely maimed, and crawl off sobbing. In fact the reason you made a name for yourself is because some of your victims live to tell the tale.

(2) Screaming

Oh, right. You remember now. You sort of failed the screaming class at Barbarian U. Actually you prefer to let your actions do the talking. Why scream when you can show off your biceps?

(5) Deadly Defensive Flailing With His Obscenely Muscular Arms

And show them off you do! If anyone gets close you can backhand them right into the concrete. NOBODY messes with Klint Bloodmurderer!

Flavor Bio (Optional): Klint knows not why he is here, as he suffers from rather terrible memory loss issues. He isn't even sure his name is actually Klint Bloodmurderer, actually. It just feels like it should be. He stopped worrying about all these things ages ago, however. Now he simply lives in the moment.

You open your eyes to find...

(2) A beautiful scene of a charred village. You know this handiwork, because it's yours. After massacre-ing the citizens and burninating the countryside  burning their village to the ground, you must have helped yourself to the tavern's booze. Wow, must have been a hell of a night.

...wait, there are still people here. Not just people, very many angry guards. You count probably a dozen of them. ...shit.

Spoiler: BlitzDungeoneer (click to show/hide)

You remember:

(4)Name: Mugen Kuro

That's right, your name is Mugen Kuro. A well-respected, if ordinary, name within your race.

(1)Race: Kitsune( Half-human, half-fox, cand transform either fully human or fully fox)
(4)Fox

And you're a kitsune! ......wait. Actually, that's the hangover talking. You always CLAIM to be one, out of embarrassment. In actuality, you're just an ordinary fox. (As ordinary as a talking, magic-using fox can be, anyway). You'd hoped all the magic training would unlock super-awesome kitsune powers... but it hasn't yet.

(5)Gender: Male

You're an unusally fine specimen of male fox, though. You can get ALL the Vixens... and draw the attention of several humanoids as well. You know how to be cute!

(5)Class: Sorcerer

Especially for a fox, you have an unusually-tuned grasp of sorcery. For years you trained at a hidden sanctuary to hone your skills. You are an especially formidable opponent.

Skills:
(6)Wandless Magic(Does not require focusing instrument to cast magic)

You are extremely competent at using magic without a wand or other instrument. (Which is good, because they are hard to carry as a fox...) You're so good at this, in fact, sometimes the mere thought of magic can cause you to cast it. This has gotten you into trouble before.

(2)Dualwielding(Is quite capable at dual wielding weapons)

...nah, you just say that to impress people. Foxes can't dual-wield! You're working on being able to do it with telekinetic powers alone, but so far have only managed one weapon at a time.

(6)Foxfire(Can create fire instantly on tails)

You're a born natural at this... and like your other magical abilities, sometimes this goes off when you don't want it to. Like when you need to pretend to be an ordinary fox for some reason.

Flavor Bio: ?? ((You may want to rewrite this in light of your rolls. Or not. It IS optional. ))

You open your eyes and:

(6) Find yourself on a well-kempt bed, in a very tidy estate! You look around and piece together your surroundings as best as you can. It seems that a very wealthy woman (you can tell because everything is pink) has found you passed out, and assumed you were seriously hurt rather than just drunk. After all, foxes don't drink, right? She seems to have taken you in as her personal pet. While you have the lap of luxury here, a glance out the second-story window tells you you're gonna be here a while. The place is heavily guarded. Whoever this woman is, she clearly has something worth protecting... or a serious sense of paranoia.

(SPECIAL) The GM feels bad for you. You now have one Awesome Point (TM).

Spoiler: darkpaladin109 (click to show/hide)

You remember:

(3)Name: Jerry
Your name is Jerry. Only close friends really call you that though. Others tend to call you "that awesome party host".

(2)Race: Booze Elemental
You aren't, strictly speaking, an elemental. You're more of an automaton. Except for the whole being sentient thing. Okay, so it's a little fuzzy. You provide booze, though.

(3)Gender: Male
As much as it matters for an "elemental", you're a male. People tend to call you "duuude" but then, they're always drunk at the time. In practice it doesn't matter much.

(6)Class: Booze Party Wizard
You are definitely the best booze party wizard the world has ever seen! You're so good at what you do, in fact, that just being in proximity to you for long enough will make someone drunk. Incidentally, that has led to you being kicked out of a few places, but you know they're just jealous.

Skills [3]:
(1)Booze Magic
(5)Drunken Aura

Your "magic", as it is, is non-existant. Your only ability was bestowed by your original summoner, and unfortunately it is not under your control. You are able to make everyone around you drunk... unfortunately that includes you. You're used to hangovers by now, but you swear you're gonna kill that summoner one day.

(4)Party Tricks

You do a pretty good job of amusing the people, though, so they don't notice you lack actual magic. Juggling bottles of booze and beating everyone at drinking games are a few of your pastimes.

(5)Telling bad jokes

You're also so good at telling bad jokes that you're worried they're starting to become good jokes. Once your audience is drunk though, it really doesn't matter.

Flavor Bio (Optional): Summoned by a clown wizard for some sort of joke. Unfortunately, he turned out to be a really good party wizard,  upstaging his summoner easily. He now travels the world for parties to entertain children at.

You wake up and find:
(4) that you're in the corner of a very dirty cellar. Whatever the latest party occasion was, the guests have all left and one disgruntled man is cleaning up the place. He gives you a smile though, so it must have been a decent party. Just another day in your life.

(SPECIAL) The GM feels bad for you. You now have one Awesome Point (TM).

Spoiler: Samarkand (click to show/hide)

You remember:

(2)Name: Food-Cookbold

...you think your name is Food-Cookbold. Unfortunately other kobolds aren't so consistent, calling you Tasty-Foodbold or Pie-bold. Your name isn't so important anyway.

(4)Race: Kobold

You are definitely a kobold though, of about average strength. Which is to say "not too strong, but dangerously cunning".

(3)Gender: Male

As it turns out, most non-kobolds have a hard time determining your gender. It doesn't help that your demeanor is slightly effeminate. Most recognize you as male, though.

(5)Class: Chef

You're quite the skilled chef. Your food is famous among the kobold community, and amazingly, rather popular amongst the other races as well. Even some of the pickier ones that never associate with kobolds will try your food.

Skills [3]:
(4)Pie Making

Pies are your main specialty. In particular, your famous Key Lime pies, although you do well enough with an assortment of fruit choices.

(3)Meat Cooking

Your ability at cooking meat is... average. You started picking up the talent when you found some people -- heretics! -- don't actually like pie. Nobody gets sick, though some seem to order meat from you to humor you more than anything else. You do best making meat pies.

(3)Butchering

You also do a servicable job of butchering the meat, although you probably miss most of the good bits.

Flavor Bio (Optional): Key Lime

You open your eyes and find:
(6) You are in a spare bedroom of a nice estate. Kobolds never see this kind of extravagance... it's hard to take it all in. You piece together last night's events... a young human boy came by, curious about your food stand. His mother looked down at you, but she reluctantly lets him try your key lime pie. He quite enjoyed it, and the mother is beside herself. Apparently this boy is amazingly picky about food. She rushes you to her manor to be a live-in cook before you have the time to say no. And apparently treated you to some fine alcohol. But... now what?

Spoiler: Beirus (click to show/hide)

You remember...

(4)Name: Jase Bladeheart

Your name is Jase Bladeheart. Your name is known among your company but you aren't well-known in the public eye, just another face. It's probably safer that way.

(1)Race: Human
(4)Race: Elf

...wait, no. The headaches are confusing you. You're not a human... sadly. You are an elf. You never quite liked the attitude of your elven brethren, and if there's one thing you'd change, it would be to be a human. But you can't.

(6)Gender: Male

You are the absolute epitome of machismo, though. Testosterone exudes from your every pore, and the women all swoon when they see you. However, the other elves are pissed that you're ruining their reputation by "being too manly". Not your problem.

(1)Class: Swordmaster
(6)Class: Axemaster

You're... wait, no, dammit, this always happens. You remember the name "Bladeheart" and assume you wield a blade. But blades are for pansies! You wield a great axe, lovingly named "Skullsmasher" by the dwarf who forged it for you. And you're the best damn Axemaster there ever was, or will be. Fellow elves wonder how you can even lift the axe that's almost as large as you, but then they see the dripping testosterone and understand. Even the dwarves are jealous of your manliness and assume there are some heretical magical rituals involved. ...you don't have a lot of friends.

Skills [3]:

(1)Using swords
(5)Using axes

Swords are for pansies. You can, and have, chopped any number of things in two with Skullsmasher.

(5)Balance

Here's one area where your regrettable Elven heritage is actually useful. You're quite agile and can dodge and balance on the toughest of terrain. You've learned to use the weight of the axe as a counterbalance to your body weight.

(5)Parrying

Many come from miles around to see just how the hell you can parry a sword with your axe. Turns out it's easy to "parry"/block blows with an axe almost as big as you are -- just hold it in front of you.

Flavor Bio (Optional): He was a mercenary, and a half-decent one at that. He and the other members of his outfit were drinking after the completion of a rather difficult task. He sort of expected a hangover, but not such a severe one.

You wake up to find:
(2) the dirt in front of your face. You pull yourself to your feet and look around. You're in some kind of forest clearing. You vaguely remember falling asleep in the inn, so you must have been dragged out here. Your outfit raised a bit of attention, and the local elves were probably quite jealous of your success. You can tell it took three of them to drag you out here, just judging by the footprints. Your money is gone but luckily you still have Skullsmasher. It was obviously too heavy for them to take from you. You don't know where the inn you were staying at is, though.

(SPECIAL) The GM feels bad for you. You now have three(!) Awesome Points (TM).

Hope nobody gets upset about me immediately screwing with their backstory and choices. This is Roll to Derp after all. And you're hungover. So let's say you were... misremembering. XD Anyone who rolled a 1 and didn't get their choice gets a consolation Awesome Point (TM) which does... something, eventually. 

[BlitzDungeoneer]

Hmm, so how in the nine circles of Hell do I get out of here? I wonder if I could get a better look of my surroundings?
Get off bed. Explore surroundings.
I wonder if anyone can guess what my name means.
Question. How does magic work here, anyway?

[darkpaladin109]

Wow, the guy who set out making a graceful elven swordmaster ended up with a better barbarian than the guy who chose to make a barbarian
Ask the man what happened.

[Samarkand]

Check what food supplies they have.

[Beirus]

((I was trying to make a graceful human swordmaster, but this turned out better than I could have imagined. Other than being an elf. Maybe I should change my name to Cacame.))

Stand up and grab Skullsmasher, then take a look at my surroundings.

[Samarkand]

Hope nobody gets upset about me immediately screwing with their backstory and choices. This is Roll to Derp after all. And you're hungover. So let's say you were... misremembering. XD Anyone who rolled a 1 and didn't get their choice gets a consolation Awesome Point (TM) which does... something, eventually. 

((A: Thus far you are a fantastic GM   B: Is there a way to earn Awesome Points besides being screwed over at chargen?))

[flabort]

See, he gets the awesome character AND the awesome points. :p

Spoiler: My turn (click to show/hide)

 Name: Roger MacCurren
Race: kobold
Gender: Male
Class: Ninja
Skill 1: Parkour+
Skill 2: Poison Mastery
Skill 3: Deathly Diplomatic

Skipping optional bio for now.

[Kadzar]

ptw

[Chink]

Name: Clock of the Wlack
Race: Giant Barbecue Chicken
Gender: Male
Class: Gizzard Wizard
Skills [3]: Saucery, Clubbery, Wizardy
Flavor Bio (Optional): Bawwwk *sizzle*