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[UnicodingUnicorn]

Will light the inferno that is the flames of war.

Alternatively, add that to petrol. Lots of it.

A camera.

[CaptainMcClellan]

Photograph all of their most public and private moments, then edit together a montage of all the worst ones and publish it in all major outlets at your disposal. Bonus points if you make bankroll doing so.

A general studies bachelor's degree.

[Zanzetkuken The Great]

Papercuts

The Moon.

[Delioth]

Drop it out of orbit.
Watch civilizations burn.

a Beanbag Chair

[RAM]

Hide the body, get away with murder.

A pair of safety scissors, an orange, a pair of jeans, cotton undergarments(you may have a wire if you so choose), a flannel shirt and plastic buttons and small amounts of thread, human hair and nails(and teeth if you are really desperate), reinforced concrete walls+steel bars+ steel door+plastic window sturdily arranged to surround you, and the contents of your stomach(porridge).

[GrizzlyAdamz]

Use the safety scissors to cut your jeans into a single long strip.
Also use them to slice into the Orange & create fail-lines on one side.
Break scissors in half.
Sharpen one half by dragging it along the concrete walls. This will be your main weapon.
Use the other half to anchor the denim strip the the wall on one side of the door. Keep the denim flat & slack, then pull it taught & up when the door is opened. Hopefully we can pound it into the wall, but if not we'll have to try to wedge it into the door itself.
The orange serves as a secondary weapon, applied directly to the eyes, (sliced-side first). Might want to wrap it in your shirt to minimize evaporation before use.


Everything in your average high school computer lab. New LCD plastic monitors with integrated computer, (no tower), fluorescent lights, no windows, cinder block walls w/ high-gloss paint, some teaching supplies & printers/copy machine in the corner. Chairs are wheeled & upholstered plastic. Desks are plywood.

[Helgoland]

Use as CIA torture chamber by putting on trololo 24/7 and locking the door.

A rusty nailfile.

[Delioth]

Stabbity. Extra damages if they didn't/couldn't get a Tetanus shot.

[GrizzlyAdamz]

A couch.
You have a wide array of tools & supplies to work with, but they're tethered to 30'x1'x1' concrete slab that's been embedded in the ground. The tools are anchored with thin adamantium chains.
You don't have a lava smelter nor adamantium-rated cutting tools.
No you don't have magic either.
Just a couch & supplies.

[Arcvasti]

Hide underneath couch. Try to ambush people while underneath the couch. Bonk head on underside of couch. Never said it had to be a weapon against THEM...

A [metric]ton of feathers.

[Delioth]

I'd like to do something more creative, but can't.
Choking Hazard.

Wireless Headphones

[UnicodingUnicorn]

Low frequency sound can kill.

Fluffy wambler (No one said it had to be real)

[Donuts]

Toss it at someone.

A tiny stick.

[blazing glory]

Jab it in the eyes.

A small amount of skin flakes.

[CaptainMcClellan]

Give someone with a dandruff allergy an allergy attack.

The avatar of the next poster.