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[Kilojoule Proton]

I know many of you will probably correct the thread title to "Dwarf Football." Really, it is probably better that it stays "Dwarf Soccer," as you will see here.

First, put this in a new creature file (e.g. creature_ball.txt):

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

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creature_ball

[OBJECT:CREATURE]

[CREATURE:SOCCERBALL]
    [DESCRIPTION:A small, lightweight, and spherical pet known for its invulnerability. It is commonly kicked around by practicing dwarves.]
    [NAME:soccerball:soccerballs:soccerball]
    [CASTE_NAME:soccerball:soccerballs:soccerball]
    [CREATURE_TILE:'o'][COLOR:7:0:1]
    [PETVALUE:1][NATURAL]
    [NOT_BUTCHERABLE]
    [LARGE_ROAMING]
    [NO_EAT][NO_DRINK][NOSTUN][NOFEAR]
    [NO_SLEEP][NOEXERT][NONAUSEA][NOPAIN][NOT_LIVING][NO_DIZZINESS]
    [NO_THOUGHT_CENTER_FOR_MOVEMENT]
    [SWIMS_INNATE][SWIM_SPEED:3000]
    [EXTRAVISION][MUNDANE]
    [COMMON_DOMESTIC][PET][IMMOBILE]
    [PREFSTRING:invulnerability]
    [BODY:BASIC_1PARTBODY_THOUGHT]
    [TISSUE:BALL_TISSUE]
        [TISSUE_NAME:ball tissue:NP]
        [TISSUE_MATERIAL:INORGANIC:ADAMANTINE]
        [RELATIVE_THICKNESS:1000]
        [HEALING_RATE:1]
        [INSULATION:200]
        [VASCULAR:0]
        [PAIN_RECEPTORS:0]
        [TISSUE_SHAPE:LAYER]
    [TISSUE_LAYER:BY_CATEGORY:ALL:BALL_TISSUE]
    [CREATURE_CLASS:BALL]
    [BODY_SIZE:0:0:100]
    [MAXAGE:50:80]
    [ALL_ACTIVE]

Next, put this in an inorganic materials file (e.g. inorganic_ball.txt):
inorganic_ball

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inorganic_ball

[OBJECT:INORGANIC]

[INORGANIC:ANGERSTONE]
[USE_MATERIAL_TEMPLATE:STONE_TEMPLATE]
[STATE_NAME_ADJ:ALL_SOLID:angerstone]
[STATE_NAME_ADJ:GAS:anger gas]
[DISPLAY_COLOR:4:7:1][TILE:3]
[SOLID_DENSITY:500]
[MATERIAL_VALUE:1]
[MAT_FIXED_TEMP:10001]
[BOILING_POINT:10000]
[IS_STONE]
[SYNDROME]
    [SYN_NAME:ANGER]
        [SYN_AFFECTED_CLASS:BALL]
        [SYN_CONTACT]
        [SYN_INHALED]
        [CE_ADD_TAG:CRAZED]

Then, put the following in a reaction file (e.g. reaction_ball.txt):

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reaction_ball

[OBJECT:REACTION]

[REACTION:ANGER_BALL]
    [NAME:Start game]
    [BUILDING:GAMESTARTER:NONE]
    [PRODUCT:100:1:BOULDER:NONE:INORGANIC:ANGERSTONE][PRODUCT_DIMENSION:150]
    [SKILL:LEADERSHIP]

You will need a workshop for boiling the anger stone, so here is what I used (put it in a building file, e.g. building_ball.txt):

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building_ball

[OBJECT:BUILDING]

[BUILDING_WORKSHOP:GAMESTARTER]
    [NAME:Gamestarter]
    [DIM:1:1]
    [WORK_LOCATION:1:1]
    [BUILD_LABOR:HAUL_ANIMALS]
    [BLOCK:1:0]
    [TILE:0:1:3]
    [TILE:1:1:3]
    [COLOR:0:1:6:7:0]
    [COLOR:1:1:4:7:1]
    [BUILD_ITEM:1:ANY_RAW_MATERIAL]

Finally, remember to add the following to your entity:

Code: [Select]

[PERMITTED_BUILDING:GAMESTARTER]
[PERMITTED_REACTION:ANGER_BALL]
This mod adds a small, cheap, and indestructible monster called the soccerball. All major entities sell it as a tame potential pet. To make it aggressive and kickable, I recommend pasturing the soccerball on a hatch surrounded by Gamestarter workshops above the field. Make sure that hatch has already been linked when you gas the soccerball. It will take a few tries to drive the soccerball into a pre-game berserk frenzy, and you will know when this has happened because there will be a sudden flood of interruption spam. With two different squads stationed on opposite sides of the field, pull the lever linked to the hatch under the ball. Alas, there is little you can do to keep the dwarves using only their feet to kick the ball.

Stadium notes:

• Civilians can see through fortifications and will stampede if the ball gets too close
• You can force the civilians to watch the game easily by building the seats as a massive dining room
• Dogs (and other animals?) will attack the ball ineffectively, which can be a FUN thing if they push the ball into a crowded tunnel
• A berserk ball is forever, so it would be wise to make a recycler with minecarts or something

ADDITION:
Should this be moved into the Mod Releases sub-forum?

ADDITION:
The soccerballs can survive dragonfire.

[Deon]

Alas, there is little you can do to keep the dwarves using only their feet to kick the ball.

But sir, that sounds like American Soccer, not like football at all.

Also, amazing idea .

[My Name is Immaterial]

I wonder what happens when you release a bunch into the goblin hordes.

[Kilojoule Proton]

Alas, there is little you can do to keep the dwarves using only their feet to kick the ball.

But sir, that sounds like American Soccer, not like football at all.

Also, amazing idea .

Thanks.

I wonder what happens when you release a bunch into the goblin hordes.

Typically, any non-(berserk soccerball) non-civilian will attack the soccerball ferociously until the ball leaves the attacker's vision range. Most likely, the goblins will end up attacking the ball until it falls into a pool or something.

I wonder if giving the ball candy flesh and skin was a bit too much, given that you can really only kill it by encasing or cave-in or atom smasher...

[Hugo_The_Dwarf]

this would be a popular sport among the hammerdwarf teams

[Kilojoule Proton]

It turns out that cyclopes also love playing dwarf soccer. Possibly, they will even love it enough not to attack the unfit haulers.

[The Bastard of France]

Well...
This is...
Unexpected...
This may just be the least sadistic thing I've seen on this forum

[Kilojoule Proton]

If kicking a non-sentient blob of candy is not sadistic enough, there is always the option of adding pain receptors or making it so that you need a boiling rock reaction to turn dwarves into soccerballs or both at once.

[Meph]

One question for you: Why?

[Hugo_The_Dwarf]

I've modded things that make be ask myself that question too. Only response is a little devil on my shoulder saying "because you could"

[Kilojoule Proton]

One question for you: Why?

Option 1: Pretty much because I can.

Option 2: We have giant sponges, which are reasonably rare and definite cause for panic. What would happen if we made a bunch terrestrial and harmless (beyond minor bruising) and still capable of spreading massive, precisely controllable panic?

[Sergarr]

controllable

panic

Dohoho.

[Kilojoule Proton]

The panic is actually fairly controllable, if you prepared hatched gutters or something. Maybe you could even use it for ballistic bowling or golf or something.

[Meph]

Is dwarf soccer extremely good to train combat skills? (you can also make a killswitch, a reaction that runs dfhack "slayrace football")

[Kilojoule Proton]

Testing...

Yes, and far too good (for balance). Do you know of ways to reduce experience gain from combat?

As for the killswitch, perhaps simply removing [CRAZED] would be enough? After all, slayrace seems to affect all matching creatures on the map. If there is a transformation-limb loss-retransformation syndrome and a proper materials cost for generating the balls, calling slayrace may not be too bad, and this makes it more time-consuming to pasture a bunch of the balls at the gate for the purpose of distracting titans or megabeasts or other annoyances. Maybe the killswitch can even be a lethal seasonal suicide interaction of some sort.

I will definitely hack around with these new possibilities once I get back to a non-Mac terminal. Thanks for the ideas!

For reference, getting to Legendary Fighter/Wrestler from unskilled recruits can take much less than a year, and this is terrible.