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[n9103]

Nice job Blaze.
Masterful Wordsmithing, to have crafted a thread with such levels of confusion, while in the course of trying to remove the confusion.

Now... to decide if I'm creeped (as if), confused like most (a bit I think), or impressed (the effort on the avatars alone warrants it).

In any case, Carry On.

[mastahcheese]

At first, I thought the OP made perfect sense.
Then I kept reading, and got really confused.
Then they posted more info, and I was like "oh, this makes sense now".
And then I kept reading, and said "I'm so confused again."
Then they posted some more, and by this point I'm going "WTH is this?"
I'm not entirely sure where I stand on this now.

[Sheb]

I must say, this is slowly getting into creepy territory. I was uncomfortable with people calling you fat before so yeah. Best giveaway ever. :p

So how is the first snackless week going?

Oh And practice my piñata-fu!

and I'd like to nominate Running With Rifles too. Man I hope I win this one.

[Chaoswizkid]

Hold the phone. Also the paddle. I mean, holding it would be required for use of it, but whatever. Pause.

This gave me a giveaway idea that's kinda side-ways.
Posters request commission art. Artist creates art. Instead of paying the artist the money for the commission art, the money is added to a giveaway fund, the rules of which I'm not totally concerned about. This requires something more complicated than what Bay12Forums allows, and also lots of good will. It's just something I thought of and I figured I'd mention since it sounded neat in my head.

Alright. Resume.

You know, I used to be pretty darn good at baseball.
Grin and a swing

[Blaze]

I'm not intentionally trying to creep anyone out, it's just my sort of humor.

Being fat is pain. I just take it literally.

Aside from Steam, I think that Desura has a gift system I can use without installing anything.
KoDP uses GoG though, which I have no idea how to work.
Donations to Toady and other indie developers (such as Sami/Unreal World) are perfectly acceptable.

Essentially, so long as I don't have to download anything and the site/payment method isn't too questionable, I can fund it.

[Aklyon]

GoG is entirely site/email-based, except for game installers you download.

[Zangi]

GoG is entirely site/email-based, except for game installers you download.

You don't even need to use the installer...

[Shakerag]

Oh, I see how this works.  Kind of.

: I was certain the function of this thread was fairly straight forward. May I ask which portions confuse you?
Or may you're just too stupid to explain properly.
: I'm sorry for being stupid and unintelligible and not having proper thread-sense!

Some of us understand what you're getting at.  Obviously everyone else is just too distracted by how fat you are to follow along.

So in keeping with the theme, I nominate I Have No Mouth, and I Must Eat Scream on Steam for $4.99 to be given away to a random person who wants it.  Because obviously if you had no mouth, you couldn't keep cramming food in there, fatty.

Oh, and I enjoy the humor.  Maybe you could aspire to be a professional comedian, like Chris Farley, John Candy, or John Pinette.  I'd say you'd fit right in with them, but then there are likely a lot of things you don't fit into anymore.

[Chaoswizkid]

Process of purchasing/obtaining things on GoG:
Find it on the site.
Add to cart.
Checkout.
Input payment information.
Buy.
Game is added to digital library similar to Steam.
Go to digital library.
Click on the game.
Choose to direct download the game's installer through your browser, or download a download manager from GoG to get the game.
Done.

I don't know how gifts work, though. Also, your card might be locked when you first try to buy a game through GoG. Their billing servers are located in Cyprus, which is a popular place for gambling and scamming servers to be set up, so some credit card comanies/banks treat the purchase as suspicious behavior. If it does happen, just a simple call saying that you were purchasing a game online from Good Old Games and answering a few questions about other stuff you bought recently should fix the problem.

[Gunner-Chan]

I can say I'm actually rather fond of this sadist/masochistic variety of humor. I'm kinda checking this thread off and on to see if more has shown up.

I'm gonna double up the nomination for IHNMaIMES Shakerag suggested. It fits the theme very well.

By the way, is the paddle required or may I bring a sledgehammer? Or a chainsaw? There's more than one way to lose weight.

[IronyOwl]

I'll throw in for liking/understanding the humor/setup as well. :3

Step 1: Aquire Paddle.
Step 2: Beat dead horse. Well, horse-sized object displaying corpse-level exercise habits and zombie-style feeding patterns.

[infiniteseq]

Was / will be the option to donate the money to snack funds of those "already fat & not caring" considered ? ;-)

What about the adopt-a-dwarf program ? You know, there are a lot of dwarves who still haven't recovered from when the economical crisis left them homeless, and worse, sock-less and booze-less.

But [semi]-seriously, I don't know how much time there is until Blaize starves / beats herself to death, so start voting for equal split between Toady and Sami, who are both doing a lot of work, on games they give for free, and since both AFAIK live off donations, could use some snacking money.

[Sheb]

Who's Sami?

[Glloyd]

Who's Sami?

UnReal World dev. Play it if you haven't already. However, I'd be inclined to donate the lion's share to Toady, seeing as this is HIS forum that we're discussing this on.

[nenjin]

I can say I'm actually rather fond of this sadist/masochistic variety of humor. I'm kinda checking this thread off and on to see if more has shown up.

That's what I've been doing too, but from the other direction. It's an fun twist on giveaways but the way you're attacking yourself is a little disturbing. Love thyself!