>POTATO
[6]
KJ has selected potato!
Go potato!How to use potato as weapon?
>THROW >EAT
>POOP ON >ACTIVATE TIME GRID
Find out what point in the series I am at. Also have a status page for character.
Before anything happens. Without spoiling anything that will happen. So yeah.
((What point are you at?))
Head to Heliopolis on a heading that won't get the fleet shot at. Also find put how many ships I have.
[1]
Your ship is followed by Tyranids. Now they're attacking Earth.
"...Did you hear that? Follow me, I sssmell prey..."
Searches for mysterious-yet-informative voice's source.
Also, the thread can pretty much be summed up by this piece of music.
[5]
Stop that! You're breaking the fifth wall now!
And you're in front of the narrator, which is me. Great.
Challenge the knight to a race on my custom racetrack.
[1]
He bashes the poop out of you instead. It's actually batman, what a twist.
Use the revenues from my french fries empire to lobby the Raptor Empire into breaking the quarantine and dealing with all the stuff rampaging around Earth.
[2]
Although they like war, they aren't fucking stupid.
"THE EMPEROR GAVE HIS LIFE FOR YOU! THE LEAST YOU CAN DO IS RETURN THE FAVOR!"
FOR THE EMPEROR!
[2]
There is no emperor, there's a council. Everyone is confuse.
Infiltrate the Pentagon as stealthily as possible.
[2]
"I WANT TO COME INSIDE SO GET OUT OF THE WAY OF MY 50-METRE TALL ZERG MONSTER"
Engage Dapper Science! Its pretty much drunk science but tea is used to initiate the intellectual trance rather than alcohol
[2]
You make a top hat. Lame.
Potato thing:
Locate & dig through the research notes & user manual I undoubtedly writ out. Particularly the research notes and their language section.
Lego:
Accept the scrub's challenge, beat him on his own track!
[6], [5]
You find the research note-they're written in ancient falmer. THAT ISN'T EVEN A REAL LIFE LANGUAGE
Meanwhile, after bashing the blocks outta the guy, you steal his car and beat his lap time.
Regain consciousness, crawl toward nearest medic.
[4]
All bedda! Probably.
Try Again
((Deja vu))
[3]
YOU GET THROUGH THE FIRST WALL! VICTORY!
Military! Balls!
Kill guards and get the GM's remote
[6]
Guards are kill. You find the saferoom. It's filled with thousands of couches.
LOLHow do people even know the remote to be in the Pentagon without metagaming? I haven't told anything about my findings to anyone in-character.
HERESY! Potato strike to the face for everyone.