Print

Please login or register.
1 Hour 1 Day 1 Week 1 Month Forever
Login with username, password and session length

[shoeless]

I was so naive, stumbling through that first fort several months back.  I made countless rookie mistakes; the top mistake was naming my dwarfs after my wife and kids.  It was only summer of the first year.  My fond of ale fisherdwarf named for my wife was out netting some scrumptious pike from the river running outside our fortress.  The alligator... it's menacing teeth ... latching on to her ... overtaking her ... too much ... too strong ... blood everywhere... in the river... on the shore...  her slain corpse tattered on the sand...

Why didn't I understand this prophesy earlier?  This game devoured my wife.

There was a time when I helped out with raising my children, cooked dinners, cleaned up, and vacuumed.  I even walked the dog on occasion.  Time wasters.  I now do those things quickly and without pleasure only to gain some goodwill tokens from my beautiful wife so I can play DF unhindered by scowls and interruptions.

Unfortunately, my wife decided this Friday would be a good night to get a babysitter for the kids and spend a night on the town, drinking and carousing with friends.  Does that mean no DF?  But it's the weekend...

Help me make it through the night.  I'm already OCD-ing on the horrific path-finding dumped on my circuits by the horrible layout of our city's downtown.  Thankfully, there is enough booze stockpiles layered about, but the untrapped and unmoated outer layers of the downtown have me already looking over every shoulder.

Please, give me advice on how I can real world DF to attain my fix and appease Almok.

[el Indio]

Shoeless looses a roaring laughter, fell and terrible!

[JimboM12]

Now when you say "real world DF" I think you should grab a pickaxe and tunnel a fortress under your house, going down about 10z or so before you hit the first cavern. Assign your wife to farming and get her working on your first crop of plump helmets or if your going above ground first, get her working on wild strawberries. Cage your children so goblins won't steal them and butcher the dog for tallow biscuits.

....Ok I took this pun way too seriously, lol.

If your friends are pc gamers, get them into playing DF. After going on length about how gobbos killed your first wardog and you responded by carving the dog into bolts which you then used to kill said goblins. And about dwarven atomsmashing some trash. And about having fey moods which result in insanity when you can't find any shells. And yadda yadda yadda...

[TD1]

And always remember; it is the yadda yadda yadda's of DF which make life interesting.

If the wife wants to go downtown, you go too. But subtly,oh so subtly, indoctrinate her into the world of DF. Find a way to multiplayer adventure mode, then bring her downtown in the leading capital, showing her the king as you do so. Then gently prompt her. Say "Now, dear. Which did you prefer? Going RL downtown, or going DF downtown?" And if she says RL Downtown, introduce her to Dwarven ale. That'll hook her.

Good luck in your endeavour to bring the word of DF into the world, brother. May you succeed!

[G-Flex]

Jesus christ.

[MrsStick]

My hubby got me into DF...then abandoned his for MineCraft.

Now we're in the exact opposite situation! I spend every waking minute thinking about/wanting to play DF (which, since I am in class, is a bad thing).

[Footkerchief]

drinking and carousing with friends

You have to admit it's pretty dwarven.

[The13thRonin]

Dwarf Fortress in relationships is like hidden fun stuff... Mine it too much and here come the demons.

[DG]

I think the subject line takes out the award for best click-bait that I've seen on these forums.

[nasobema]

Dwarf Fortress in relationships is like hidden fun stuff... Mine it too much and here come the demons.

This is one of the best quotes I've seen in the forums! so true ... 

[shoeless]

Dwarf Fortress in relationships is like hidden fun stuff... Mine it too much and here come the demons.

Absolutely true.  If I can figure out how to sig this bad boy, I'm doing it.  I'd also like to explain to my wife why this is hilarious, but she'd likely just tilt her head, ask if this is about the 'stupid dwarf game', call me a nerd, and walk away.

Edit:  Sigged.

[BigD145]

My hubby got me into DF...then abandoned his for MineCraft.

Husband has been possessed!
I'm sorry your husband had a strange mood and ended up making a useless trinket out of useless materials without gaining any experience in the process.

[Mictlantecuhtli]

My hubby got me into DF...then abandoned his for MineCraft.

Now we're in the exact opposite situation! I spend every waking minute thinking about/wanting to play DF (which, since I am in class, is a bad thing).

The horror.

[Ruhn]

Keep an eye on the real life architecture to get inspiration for fortress design!
Also, beware of an Ambush by the Humans.

[TD1]

Keep an eye on the real life architecture to get inspiration for fortress design!
Also, beware of an Ambush by the Humans.

Or, if you had an especially good time carousing and getting drunk, watch out for ambush by the elves. The knife-wielding elves.