((Hehe. I do hope my fancy gear won't burn me down because of a bad roll. But still...))
Screw Holocaust. Burn anyone who comes in sight before I die myself.
Grab a bit of rebar and beat the nazi with it if he tries to attack me. Otherwise/afterwards, try to find a sports car in the hospital parking lot. Hey, it was underground, so it probably survived!
Comrade P (4) vs Fniff (1)
Fniff runs into the ruins of the hospital, looking for a melee weapon. And by melee weapon, I mean a chunk of metal. Fniff is very nearly seized by a bout of gastrointestinal distress, but fortunately the MedCo cocktail working his way through his lower intestines manages to spare his dignity.
This is fortunate, since dignity is all that remains to him as Comrade P lights him up like a series of nuclear explosions lights up everything everyone loves and cares about.
Comrade P:
8 turns to live!Fniff:
Symptom suppression utilized!Fniff:
Died in a fire!Eat the bomb.
(1)
Random Symptom Table: (3)
I love it when the dice conspire against players. WAIT I'M BREAKING THE FOURTH WALL DON'T LOOK AUGH
...
Drawing on the talents of your ancient and proud line of circus performers, you unhinge your jaw and get to work. It tastes like dust and government surplus as it works its way across your tongue, but feels like accomplishment and victory when it finally slips past your gullet and slides down your throat.
It is
much more painful on the way back up.
You collapse in a quivering heap of spew and blood, muscles spasming from head to toe as you disgorge the bomb like an anaconda which has just checked into a weight loss center. Your throat is scraped raw with bile, then with pokey plastic bomb casing bits, and then with bile again. After a moment which feels like an eternity but really only takes one turn, you get up on all fours to regard the slick sticky bomb baby you just ejected from your mouth.
It begins to beep.
7 turns to live!Symptom exhibited: Vomiting! 2/15Crawl out of rubble, vomit up the nasty stuff.
(4)
You successfully crawl out of a nondescript pile of rubble. You also successfully cough up the dust, debris, insulation, and little pieces of stone which had been lodged in your throat. For good measure, you force yourself to vomit up anything you might have swallowed; glass microfibers can be deadly, and you don't know if the building was up to code in terms of asbestos content.
There, now you'll only die of the radiation!
9 turns to live!Oi, we ought to have 15 minutes before the radioactive particle start to drop. Unless this was a neutron bomb, of course.
(1)
Random Symptom Table: (1)
Sitting up from your dusty ruin-covering, you scratch your head, wondering how anyone could possibly be exhibiting symptoms of radiation poisoning this quickly. Maybe it's some kind of highly advanced population-clearing bomb? Maybe the fallout is coming from the first bombs to fall, and not the subsequent detonations. Maybe the rubble shielded you from the heat and other immediately-lethal bits of the explosion, but the radiation penetrated into your little apocalyptic cocoon. Maybe the invisible Turn 0 was the 15 minute window you had to work with, but you spent that getting not-pinned-under-your-cheating-ex-wife's-mercedes-that-you-paid-for-with-the-alimony-what-a-greedy-bitch. Maybe the GM hasn't done a lot of research and is working off a hastily Wikipedia'd entry on ARS.
Your musings are interrupted when your eyes start to bleed. Also your face. Not, like, the orifices
on your face, your face is just sort of oozing blood.
9 turns to live!Symptom exhibited: Bleeding! 3/15Run from the Nazi to the drug store/other convenient supply dump!
(1)
Random Symptom Table: (7)
You watch the inexplicable Nazi inexplicably incinerate a fellow survivor. Okay, maybe that's explicable, Nazis are known for that kind of societal cauterization, right? Whatever, the important thing is you do not want to be anywhere near the guy using his last few moments of life to murder people.
Unfortunately, as you turn to flee the scene, you are gripped with a headache. Headache is probably not a good way to describe it though, since it is thoroughly incapacitating. It's as if somebody had bathed each and every nerve receptor in your brain with an absurd amount of radiation and now all of those nerve endings are dissolving, and forcefully telling your brain that they are dissolving.
Wait, no, that's exactly what's happening.
8 turns to live!Symptom exhibited: Headache! 4/15Become one with the fallout. Assume my ultimate form.
(6)
As the fallout begins snowing down on the devastated remains of your local community, you run around like a kid on a snowday, catching little flakes of glowy dust on your tongue. Oh, what a wonderful worlllllld!
Unfortunately, even though you have perhaps the most carefree apocalyptic frolic you've ever had, it seems that- WAIT NO HERE IT COMES!
YEAH ENERGY... tongue? Maybe you should have caught the glowy dust on more immediately useful bits of your anatomy. Though actually, this is incredibly painful.
9 turns to live!Energy tongue! Because radiation is basically science magic?Become a mutant
(1)
Random Symptom Table: (2)
You aren't sure, but you think that radiation is basically science magic, and God seems to be in agreement so you focus on mutating.
The lining of your stomach begins to dissolve!
It's okay, it's a slow death. All you feel is an intense sense of nausea, like your stomach is trying to crawl up your throat and out of the liquified goo your internal organs are becoming. Incidentally, you also have a bit of heartburn.
9 turns to live!Symptom exhibited: Nausea! 5/15Have been in a nuclear bomber when bomb detonated, drop payload as the blast hurls me out of the sky onto the hospital.
(2)
You take a moment to think about your life.
You don't exactly recall which government/terrorist group/paramilitary organization/evil omnicorporation/secret society you work for. They all tend to blur together after a while. Whoever they are, you're not sure why they ordered a series of nuclear detonations over this city. You're certainly not sure why the bombers are all flying so close to one another; a guy could get radiation poisoning flying this close to Ground Zero!
Well, no biggie, you just have to drop your bomb, watch it fall, and zoo-
Your bomb explodes prematurely.
The plane tumbles end over end, falling to earth like a flaming irradiated Icarus. Somehow, you manage to eject, and you fall away from the plane through a fresh cloud of fallout. Luckily, your chute deploys!
Unluckily, you are now strapped to a giant target as you fall toward a city full of for-the-moment-survivors who probably aren't too happy to see you.
9 turns to live!Search the rubble for a bit of priest.
(4)
Feck.
The church is completely destroyed. A bit of rummaging proves that the congregation is also completely destroyed. Well, they were a bunch of filthy sinning gobshites anyway. Though speaking of filthy sinning gobshites, you
really need a priest to perform the Last Rites before your skin falls off.
Luck! Under a big piece of rock (not unlike the boulder which was used to entomb Christ our Savior,) you find most of a cassock! And also a right hand! Everyone knows that's the holiest hand!
8 turns to live!