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[Man of Paper]

I'm talking about those situations where you can't help but laugh because it's Dwarf Fortress, of course (incident) would happen.

For example, the inspiration for this topic. I've got my best fort ever currently up and running (meaning I actually have a military AND struck spoilerite in the same fort). My first gobbo ambush occurs and I send The Paints of Trampling, consisting of a speardwarf commander, an axe dwarf, a mace dwarf, and the star of the squad hammer lord. She was pretty good at her job, having fistfought an elephant while migrating into the fortress and took an Ettin and giantess down on her own. So when she charged the goblins behind the captain everyone figured there'd be a massacre.

There wasn't.

You see, one of the goblins had a crossbow with silver bolts and took a shoot at the commander. I watched as he dodged like a badass and I breathed a sigh of relief. And then I saw the hammer lord lined up eight squares directly behind the commander. I continued to watch as the bolt collided with the hammer lords domepiece, and I couldn't help but think that a large part of me expected that to be the only possible outcome. Typical Fuggin Dwarf Fortress.

[viewtifulrexx]

I was trying to build a wall around some farming area and kept getting the message "Construction canceled, creature present" every time I unsuspended it. Finally, I went to watch what was happening. My dwarf was continually going to build the wall, and standing right where the wall was supposed to go. "Oh hey, I can't build a wall here, there's a dwarf in the way!"

[kibaseviltwin]

there's a demon invasion in my fortress a demon whom slew all my legendary soldier dwarves was slain by a nine-year old who was promptly named militia captain

[Cedwyn]

Young bull fights a badger.  Looses 1 leg, 3 feet.  Can't move.  Survives many years and grows into a adult bull.

[Adrian]

I survived everything from ambushes to forgotten beasts.
Then a single kitten was killed by a badger boar and a tantrum spiral began.

[voodooattack]

[smurfingtonthethird]

Testing a magma cannon incorrectly made it fire backwards, taking out my control room and dining room. Burning dogs everywhere.

[Burtjoneson]

Pulling a lever to test out a bridge and having my mechanic walk right over it just in time, catapulting over a cliff and into my lava pit. Such is life for your average dorf.

[Xantalos]

I got a quest to kill myself.
The village then massacred themselves on the end of my pick. As I stood on a pile of corpses, I contemplated completing the quest.
Dorf Fortress.

[WaffleEggnog]

I remember setting up an atom smasher to help my FPS a while back when I played DF a lot more. Well, as soon as I gave the order to pull the lever, about 30 kids, 4 elephants, 27 kittens and a bonecrafter decided to go fuck around under the bridge.

RIP.

[VerdantSF]

I forgot to check on the dragons I had guarding the cavern entrance from forgotten beasts.  Up to that point, they had killed off any forgotten beasts without any trouble.  Of course, when I finally hotkeyed back down, all four of my adult dragons were dead .

[Caiburn]

Aban Osorgeshud, Miner cancels Store Item in Stockpile: Interrupted by Llama wool.

[Lielac]

Aban Osorgeshud, Miner cancels Store Item in Stockpile: Interrupted by Llama wool.

Was he storing the llama wool?

[magmaholic]

Furry much ?

[mastahcheese]

So I actually got around to digging out a channel under my fort so I could get fresh water and fish without having to go outside.
Sounds like a flood waiting to happen, right?
Nope, friggin dorves put in the wall grates like I told them too, but then a dwarf decided to tantrum the hinges off, and I got killed by marauding alligators that swam through the opening.
I first got suspicious when all of my fishermen went mysteriously missing.