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Author Topic: Most Brutal/Badass Things You've Done Thread  (Read 52771 times)

Nopkar

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Re: Most Brutal/Badass Things You've Done Thread
« Reply #45 on: January 20, 2014, 07:02:15 am »

This is a story I tell frequently to all new DF players in my area, among others.

I once had an adventurer. He had traveled continents and slain mighty titans. None could stand before him! His skills were legendary, his attributes that of a deity. He was perfection incarnate


He was traveling through an abandoned castle. In its courtyard resided a small herd of Horses, not more than 20. I happened to pass too closely for their liking and one of them kicked at me.

"How dare this lowly creature strike at one such as myself!?!" my adventurer yelled! "I shall teach this cretin the meaning of PAIN"

I sheathed my weapon and shouldered my shield...I then punched the horse so hard in the face that it died instantly. by this point of the story they're usually pretty amused. I then go on to describe my anger at its feeble corpse and decide to punish the rest of the herd. I pick up the body of the horse and hurl it at the nearest horse.

Combat logs describe a gruesome scene:

Flying horse corpse strikes the horse in the abdomen, impaling it.
Horse corpse loses hoof x2, right front leg, back right leg, head.

I then proceed to pick both corpses up and duel wield them in a horse slaughtering rampage...



I have no failed to gain a single new player yet.
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Gallahan

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Re: Most Brutal/Badass Things You've Done Thread
« Reply #46 on: January 21, 2014, 11:46:38 pm »

Well, not much. One time I created a human outsider. This, of course, means that she started off with a copper spear, a large copper dagger, and no clothes whatsoever.

After procuring myself a shield from a local elf I've mained, I took a few steps in the overworld and accidentally discovered a lair. I went in like a fool and encountered a dragon. Quite surprisingly, I managed to get a few hits in until it happened: the dragon charged me, knocking me down and ripping my shield arm off my body. He then took advantage of my dazed state and set me ablaze when I rather ineffectively tried to run.

After three or so turns of burning alive, I was no longer dazed... But I knew I was doomed. So I did the only thing I could: I threw my goddamn copper spear at it in defiance... And it got the dragon in the head. Then I bled to death.

Future adventurers will find a dead dragon with a spear lodged in its head and ashes everywhere. My adventurer, Xenias Aurabeast, died as a hero that no one will ever know since her body was incinerated.
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Tawa

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Re: Most Brutal/Badass Things You've Done Thread
« Reply #47 on: January 22, 2014, 08:48:41 pm »

Weird, everyone who plays outsiders always seems to start as a female character. As far as I've read.

ANYWAY

A few days ago, in case you didn't read the Draw your Adventures post, I ran through a door and killed a leader on the other side in one smooth motion.

Of course, since that doesn't work well with real physics, I instead pictured him beating the door down with his sword and smashing the leader's head at the same time.
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Grombardrim

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Re: Most Brutal/Badass Things You've Done Thread
« Reply #48 on: January 24, 2014, 03:39:32 am »

My Elf adventurer found a Labyrinth while I was on my way to the capital, so I decided that my very first adventure would be in there.  I grinded for a bit, got an Iron Longsword and Iron Shield, recruited a bunch of expendable meatshields noble companions, and went back to destroy whatever foul beast had claimed the Labyrinth.

The Minotaur somehow spawned behind me (there were only dead-ends between me and the stairway, I had checked all of them!) and charged my humans.  The first I knew of it was a small message saying "The -Iron Pick- has lodged itself in Human Spearman's upper body!"  Now, I knew from the wiki that Minotaurs had really good weapon skills with most forms of weaponry, but tended to be unarmed.  This one had a fucking Iron Pick.  And I, being an Elf, was UNARMORED.  At this point, I was thinking "oh shit oh shit oh shit."  The Minotaur smashes its way through my lackeys, then starts boasting about its kills (five Elves like myself, and the three humans I had just fed to it's meat-grinder).  I'm pretty much resigned to having to make a new Adventurer now.  So, the Minotaur charges.  I dodge.  It attacks.  I dodge.  It attacks again.  I do-wait, is this a wall behind me?  FUCK!

With no other options, I start attacking.  And hit it in the leg.  Then in the lower body.  Then in the head.  And again, and again.  The badass, however, is not my Elf.

THE MINOTAUR DIED OF BLOOD-LOSS FROM IT'S LEG BEFORE I COULD BREAK THROUGH ITS HEAD!

Edit: I proceeded to edit the raws so that I could make myself a *Minotaur Leather Cloak* (I have Wanderer's Friend installed).
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Cthulhu

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Re: Most Brutal/Badass Things You've Done Thread
« Reply #49 on: January 25, 2014, 12:37:33 am »

I modded the game so human hearts were gougable, then put all my skill points in wrestling and tore out people's hearts.
tower,
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Shoes...

Astrid

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Re: Most Brutal/Badass Things You've Done Thread
« Reply #50 on: January 25, 2014, 05:14:21 am »



I think that sums it up pretty nicely.
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Tawa

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Re: Most Brutal/Badass Things You've Done Thread
« Reply #51 on: January 25, 2014, 10:42:37 am »

I modded the game so human hearts were gougable, then put all my skill points in wrestling and tore out people's hearts.
tower,

That reminds me of a goofy flash animation I once saw about a guy who died over infinity times.
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Signs

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Re: Most Brutal/Badass Things You've Done Thread
« Reply #52 on: January 25, 2014, 01:20:12 pm »

My adventurer only had two kills, a jaguar that was terrorizing a neighboring village and a lone goblin. I was traveling to a town when I was ambushed by three men. Drowsy, hungry, and thirsty I started to flee. Before crossing the river an alligator started attacking one of my pursuers. The alligator tore off his leg and finished him off. The alligator set his sights on a mace man, wrestling with him until they both fell into the river. I was fighting a warlord, making sure to dodge their attacks rather than initiate. The warlord dodged my attack and fell in the river, giving me enough time to think out my next moves. The warlord regained their balance and came back at me. JUST after the warlord left the river, it froze, encasing the mace man and alligator in ice. Somehow I was able to to strike down the warlord, surely by sheer luck.

Anyways this was by far my most exciting encounter, and I have no idea how my adventurer was able to kill a warlord. :D
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Grombardrim

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Re: Most Brutal/Badass Things You've Done Thread
« Reply #53 on: January 25, 2014, 05:01:50 pm »

Not at all badass, but certainly brutal.  I went into an Elvish Keep's dungeon on my latest adventurer (who had a full set of Masterwork Adamantine armor, I might add), and found a room with a single Ant Soldier Woman Blowgunner.  I ripped her blowgun out of her hands, and let her beat hopelessly at me with her four hands to train my Armor and Shield Use skills.  Eventually she got collapsed from exhaustion, at which point I took out my weapon, a large serrated Adamantine disc, and promptly sawed her arms and legs off before leaving her to bleed out.
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cyberTripping

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Re: Most Brutal/Badass Things You've Done Thread
« Reply #54 on: January 25, 2014, 05:33:09 pm »

Not at all badass, but certainly brutal.  I went into an Elvish Keep's dungeon on my latest adventurer (who had a full set of Masterwork Adamantine armor, I might add), and found a room with a single Ant Soldier Woman Blowgunner.  I ripped her blowgun out of her hands, and let her beat hopelessly at me with her four hands to train my Armor and Shield Use skills.  Eventually she got collapsed from exhaustion, at which point I took out my weapon, a large serrated Adamantine disc, and promptly sawed her arms and legs off before leaving her to bleed out.

I'm assuming you gain these things through a custom reaction, and if so, could you share it? I'm not too good with reaction making.
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Grombardrim

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Re: Most Brutal/Badass Things You've Done Thread
« Reply #55 on: January 25, 2014, 06:04:48 pm »

Sure, here are the raws (be advised that this is a cheat, if you want "legit" Adamantine armor I'm sure there are mods to let you buy it or something):

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

You need to add them to the "reactions.txt" document if you want to use them.
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Starweaver396

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Re: Most Brutal/Badass Things You've Done Thread
« Reply #56 on: January 25, 2014, 07:53:17 pm »

   [PRODUCT:100:1:WEAPON:ITEM_WEAPON_MORNINGSTAR:INORGANIC:ADAMANTINE]
    [PRODUCT:100:30:AMMO:ITEM_AMMO_ARROWS:INORGANIC:ADAMANTINE]
   [PRODUCT:100:30:AMMO:ITEM_AMMO_BOLTS:INORGANIC:ADAMANTINE]
   [PRODUCT:100:1:WEAPON:ITEM_WEAPON_BOW:INORGANIC:ADAMANTINE]
   [PRODUCT:100:1:WEAPON:ITEM_WEAPON_CROSSBOW:INORGANIC:ADAMANTINE]

These will be utterly worthless. They are either blunt weapons or projectiles, all of which need to be heavy to deal real damage. And you forgot pants.  :P

All my megabeasts are dead, so I'm wandering around killing night creatures. Whole families of night creatures. With twenty followers. And no armor cause I'm an outsider and bigger than a human.
Edit. Killed ten kobolds before they got me. They filled a page in the historical figures.
« Last Edit: January 26, 2014, 01:53:05 pm by Starweaver396 »
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...a limbless, headless, bloodless and mutilated dwarf torso that is nevertheless kept alive through benevolent faerie magicks. He is blind, helpless, and in excruciating pain, and yet does not die...
E: I should point out that this is all because of Starweaver giving me inspiration   Aren't you happy with yourself, Starweaver?

Duul

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Re: Most Brutal/Badass Things You've Done Thread
« Reply #57 on: January 25, 2014, 10:41:25 pm »

I recently started a 100 year world for my adventurer and was given a quest to kill a crime boss in the catacombs of a local town. However, having just started, I had no armor and even less skill with my weapon, but I continued on with desperate hope. When I arrived in the catacombs I was immediately crippled with 2 bolts to my legs, along with around 7 bolts to the upper body. Although I was incredibly lucky that none damaged my spine or nervous system, the horrible pain caused me to pass out almost immediately when I tried to fend off my attacker. It took me at least a day to crawl out of that dungeon into the safety of the fortress above, with the crossbowman torturing me every step of the way up. When I finally got out, I slept for hours to recover my injuries, but when I woke up, boy was I pissed. I cut every single finger and toe off that crossbowman, and when he passed out from the pain, I waited for him to wake up before I gouged his eyes out with his own crossbow bolts. It was one of the most satisfying experiences I've ever felt in this game.
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Grombardrim

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Re: Most Brutal/Badass Things You've Done Thread
« Reply #58 on: January 26, 2014, 05:15:09 am »

And you forgot pants.

Actually, I just realized, the armor raws will be basically worthless to anyone who isn't me.  I have modded boots (ITEM_BOOT_THIGH) that cover the upper leg, modded breastplate (ITEM_ARMOR_FULL) that covers the throat, modded gloves (ITEM_GLOVES_HIGH) that cover the upper arms, modded shield (ITEM_SHIELD_TOWER) with a bit higher block chance (I tend not to use it unless I meet a lasher though), and a modded chain shirt (ITEM_ARMOR_MAIL_DRESS) that covers the entire body.  So unless you have those in your raws, trying to run "Armor Time" will crash DF.  To fix that, change them to the non-modded versions, so the new raw would be:

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

Also, thanks for the info about ranged weapons, I thought that Adamantine ammo would be more effective (more armor-piercing ability), and unless you get into melee with a ranged weapon, the material it's made of really doesn't matter.
« Last Edit: January 26, 2014, 05:17:37 am by Grombardrim »
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ChildofSolitude

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Re: Most Brutal/Badass Things You've Done Thread
« Reply #59 on: January 26, 2014, 12:24:21 pm »

Weird, everyone who plays outsiders always seems to start as a female character. As far as I've read.

It's because they spawn naked, I'd imagine.
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