Hey guys, delay me a turn, I just got really ill this morning and am not sure when I'll get to play DF again...
Gosh-darnit.
Fine, I'll start my turn. I'll be taking my own sweet time updating though.
Part 1: What the Dwarf Christ1st o' Granite, 262So I been gettin' might bored sitting outside the fort, yes? So nobody can blame me for going back inside against orders when the bridge came back down, yes? I mean I am the highest ranking military official, so I see no reason why I can't make decisions like that.
Anyway, so I went inside. And everyone was dead. Yep, everyone. There are only 39 dwarves left. Not to mention the fabric of reality's gone all wacky again and the place now looks, somehow,
even more like a goblin's arse then it already did.Since our previous Overseer obviously has gone of the deep end, I'm in charge now. Jackal says we should instate Marshal law. Who the hell is Marshal Law? I decided everyone should just listen to me since I'm the militia commander instead.
So, for posterity's sake, allow me to describe what the lads in the Guard have termed a '
clusterf*ck of legendary porportions':1. We have no food. Well, no food for vamps. If Asmoth wasn't so popular among the others I'd have her off'd fer forcing this curse on us. Better not tell anyone that.
2. We have no rooms assigned to our mayor and queen! They'll be going absolutely
bonkers! Maybe it isn't too late to lock meself back outside the fort?
3. Morale is so low cockroaches would need to bend over to see it.
4. A bunch o' folks have started describing themselves as "Rhakenists". I have no idea what that means, but seeing as Rhaken's current platform consists of sitting in a coffin and getting eaten by worms, this probably isn't a good thing.
5. Some goon flooded our bloody metal stockpile and sank what looks like half our arsenal into it. The area smells vaguely like well-cooked pork, which is both alluring and disturbing.
6. Nobody labelled the level to seal off the corridor to hell...
which isn't sealed. There's literally nothing between the demonspawn and us.
7. A dozen o' us are wounded. I can't remember how that happened, but we need us some crutches and diagnosis, ASAP.
8. Since all the crimes in the fort have been blamed on the queen, I have no excuse to track down Karius and
beat that little drip to a pulp for dumping this on me.Also of note, there's garbage litterally all over the fort. In between pieces of litter, you'll find a good billion chicks. They'll likely be covered in their own damn excrement.
I look at our stocks and almost vomit in disgust.
Adamantine crossbows. Most of our arms and armor submerged in lava.
If I didn't know precisely where hell is (slightly beneath Steelhold) I'd assume I was in it. As it currently stands, we'll probably get there soon enough.
OOC: Where the hell is the lever for the bridge over the trenches and the bridge to hell? BTW, can someone walk me through fixing the graphics? The current settings in my init file match the regular ASCII, but it won't go back to normal.
Also goddamn. This place is actually screwed. Like, revert-level screwed. The next siege to roll around will probably finish us.
In layman's terms, we're boned.