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[tahujdt]

The Computer is my friend!

Yea, though I walk through the shadow of the valley of Communism, I fear no mutant scum;
for Thou art with me;
Thy cameras and Thy Internal Security troopers they comfort me.


Friend Computer! How should we send in our applications to you?

Your firend, the Computer, has thoughtfully provided a Semiprivate Messaging System accessible in the upper right corner of your PDC.

Friend Computer! Commie Mutant Traitors have hacked the printout to spread disinformation about the PDC operating system. They replaced your statement that the SMS was accessible in the upper-left corner with the false statement that it was accessible in the right corner.

[Remuthra]

The Computer is my friend!

Yea, though I walk through the shadow of the valley of Communism, I fear no mutant scum;
for Thou art with me;
Thy cameras and Thy Internal Security troopers they comfort me.


Friend Computer! How should we send in our applications to you?

Your firend, the Computer, has thoughtfully provided a Semiprivate Messaging System accessible in the upper left corner of your PDC.
[REVISED AS PER EDICT 12904.1421.24.4.12.6]

Friend Computer! Commie Mutant Traitors have hacked the printout to spread disinformation about the PDC operating system. They replaced your statement that the SMS was accessible in the upper-left corner with the false statement that it was accessible in the right corner.

I'm afraid I don't know what you're talking about, citizen.

[tahujdt]

The Computer is my friend!

Yea, though I walk through the shadow of the valley of Communism, I fear no mutant scum;
for Thou art with me;
Thy cameras and Thy Internal Security troopers they comfort me.


Friend Computer! How should we send in our applications to you?

Your firend, the Computer, has thoughtfully provided a Semiprivate Messaging System accessible in the upper left corner of your PDC.
[REVISED AS PER EDICT 12904.1421.24.4.12.6]

Friend Computer! Commie Mutant Traitors have hacked the printout to spread disinformation about the PDC operating system. They replaced your statement that the SMS was accessible in the upper-left corner with the false statement that it was accessible in the right corner.

I'm afraid I don't know what you're talking about, citizen.

I must have been the subject of Commie mutant traitor sabotage.

[GreatWyrmGold]

As I am not experienced in pharmaceutical correction, I would not risk making a diagnosis on my own, when doing so could result in danger to the medicatee. You are suggesting that I use my own pharmaceutical knowledge, which would result in danger, which is treason. You are suggesting that I engage in treason, which is treason.

How do you know that medication is a suitable treatment at all, then? Such dangerous medical advice is treason. Also, how was I to know you had no medical training? Friend Computer will surely forgive such an error in judgement, for why would I assume a fellow citizen would make such recommendations without any idea of what to properly give? After all, such actions are also treasonous. You could also have given a general classification or such of the type of medication you see as appropriate; any citizen can do such. Failure to do so indicates that either you do not know, which indicates a lack of proper education, which indicates that an error occurred during your training and you did not report it, which is treason; or that you know but are withholding the information, which is treason. Furthermore, your implications of my treason are false, and treasonous.

Your creation of a hypothetical Troubleshooter without proper representation of him as such could convince other citizens that he actually exists. My traitorous false accusation, for which I beg my friend, the computer, for forgiveness, was based on your failure to properly represent GreatWormGold-G-GWG-1 as a fictional character.

Are you implying that you believed I was GreatWyrmGold-G-GWG-1, despite the fact that the said individual is a Green-clearance dragon and I am a Red-clearance Troubleshooter? This indicates severe hallucinations, which are an indication of either a severe mental defect on your part, which mandates the recall of your clone line for testing to make sure you do not all possess such a defect, or of use of hallucinogens, which are provided only by members of certain secret societies; thus, you are either a member of such a society--which is treason--or you are aware of such an individual yet did not report him, which is treason. Furthermore, your claims of improper representation are claims of treason, which rest on me mentioning the hypothetical dragon's name. Such an accusation is obviously false, as fictional individuals such as Teela-O-MLY, created by Friend Computer, may be discussed without worries of treason, as fiction is not inherently treasonous. Accusing one individual of treason and implying such for uncountable numbers of Alpha Complex citizens is treason. Finally, your misspelling of the name of said individual is also treason, as even small errors allow mutant commie traitors to breach the defenses of Alpha Complex.


Incidentally, Remuthra, why haven't you answered the questions I PM'd you? I require the information I requested to complete my Troubleshooter, and impeding such efforts is treason.

[Remuthra]

Incidentally, Remuthra, why haven't you answered the questions I PM'd you? I require the information I requested to complete my Troubleshooter, and impeding such efforts is treason.

Woe unto those who wish to harm the efficiency of Alpha Complex and the Computer! A treasonous Commie sabotage has prevented my New Messages Alert Notification from performing its sacred duty to inform me of these urgent requests. Rest assured, an answer is being prepared with utmost haste, and an IntSec team has been dispatched to investigate the error.

ADDENDUM: A helpful citizen has supplied the Complex with a highly advanced Application Requisition Database. All enterprising citizens are recommended to use this highly efficient system.

http://www.paranoia-live.net/forms/cpucentral.htm

Please use acquired Standard PDC Namespaces for completion of form requests.

[GreatWyrmGold]

The message has been received and the creation will commence once this citizen's un-treasonous and in fact entirely non-Paranoia-related duties are complete.

[Dorsidwarf]

This loyal citizen of Alpha Complex has sent in his application slip to Friend Computer




_______________________________________________________
Shall we post a 'santized' version of our character sheets here, IE: The bits other players should be able to see. Not that my character has anything on his sheet he shouldn't, obviously.

[Remuthra]

This loyal citizen of Alpha Complex has sent in his application slip to Friend Computer




_______________________________________________________
Shall we post a 'santized' version of our character sheets here, IE: The bits other players should be able to see. Not that my character has anything on his sheet he shouldn't, obviously.

All Application information is confidential. Willful dissemination of any information gleaned from a Troubleshooter Application, or indication of the previous act of doing so is impolite and may be considered a violation of security clearances, which is treason.

[tahujdt]

As I am not experienced in pharmaceutical correction, I would not risk making a diagnosis on my own, when doing so could result in danger to the medicatee. You are suggesting that I use my own pharmaceutical knowledge, which would result in danger, which is treason. You are suggesting that I engage in treason, which is treason.

How do you know that medication is a suitable treatment at all, then? Such dangerous medical advice is treason. Also, how was I to know you had no medical training? Friend Computer will surely forgive such an error in judgement, for why would I assume a fellow citizen would make such recommendations without any idea of what to properly give? After all, such actions are also treasonous. You could also have given a general classification or such of the type of medication you see as appropriate; any citizen can do such. Failure to do so indicates that either you do not know, which indicates a lack of proper education, which indicates that an error occurred during your training and you did not report it, which is treason; or that you know but are withholding the information, which is treason. Furthermore, your implications of my treason are false, and treasonous.

Your creation of a hypothetical Troubleshooter without proper representation of him as such could convince other citizens that he actually exists. My traitorous false accusation, for which I beg my friend, the computer, for forgiveness, was based on your failure to properly represent GreatWormGold-G-GWG-1 as a fictional character.

Are you implying that you believed I was GreatWyrmGold-G-GWG-1, despite the fact that the said individual is a Green-clearance dragon and I am a Red-clearance Troubleshooter? This indicates severe hallucinations, which are an indication of either a severe mental defect on your part, which mandates the recall of your clone line for testing to make sure you do not all possess such a defect, or of use of hallucinogens, which are provided only by members of certain secret societies; thus, you are either a member of such a society--which is treason--or you are aware of such an individual yet did not report him, which is treason. Furthermore, your claims of improper representation are claims of treason, which rest on me mentioning the hypothetical dragon's name. Such an accusation is obviously false, as fictional individuals such as Teela-O-MLY, created by Friend Computer, may be discussed without worries of treason, as fiction is not inherently treasonous. Accusing one individual of treason and implying such for uncountable numbers of Alpha Complex citizens is treason. Finally, your misspelling of the name of said individual is also treason, as even small errors allow mutant commie traitors to breach the defenses of Alpha Complex.


Incidentally, Remuthra, why haven't you answered the questions I PM'd you? I require the information I requested to complete my Troubleshooter, and impeding such efforts is treason.

Friend Computer has in his infinite wisdom assigned a general code of Medication to any correctional activity that involves pharmaceuticals. I would, of course, not know what medication to suggest for my misguided comrade, because Friend Computer had decided in his aforementioned infinite wisdom that I would not need that knowledge. You are suggesting that Friend Computer forgot to provide me with everything I needed.

My mistaking you for the misrepresentedly fictional person GreatWyrmGold-G-GWG-1 was due in part to the fact that you had failed to represent yourself as Red Clearance. If you had added anything in your forum profile that designated otherwise (as I have done), then the fault would be entirely mine.

[The Froggy Ninja]

PTW

[GiglameshDespair]

Actually, I don't have the spare time to join another forum game. My apologies, Friend Computer.

[Remuthra]

The Computer is disappointed by your inability to devote yourself to the High Cause of rooting out Commie Mutant traitors, but understands the tendancy of Alpha Complex's devoted citizens to overburden themselves with selfless duties. It has been requested that you are informed that there is always a need for Troubleshooters, especially due to the [CLASSIFIED]% mortality rate. If you should feel the calling to serve the Computer, do not hesitate to apply. Only you can finally achieve eternal and ultimate peace, happiness, and efficiency!

[GreatWyrmGold]

Friend Computer has in his infinite wisdom assigned a general code of Medication to any correctional activity that involves pharmaceuticals. I would, of course, not know what medication to suggest for my misguided comrade, because Friend Computer had decided in his aforementioned infinite wisdom that I would not need that knowledge. You are suggesting that Friend Computer forgot to provide me with everything I needed.

There are many non-medication treatments, however. An individual such as yourself suggesting one class of treatments over another despite his lack of medical treatment is acting treasonously. You do not need that knowledge because you are not to provide that advice. Providing advice against Friend Computer's wishes is also treason.

My mistaking you for the misrepresentedly fictional person GreatWyrmGold-G-GWG-1 was due in part to the fact that you had failed to represent yourself as Red Clearance. If you had added anything in your forum profile that designated otherwise (as I have done), then the fault would be entirely mine.

All current Troubleshooters in this thread are clearly identified as Red clearance at this time. Failure to read the Op is treason.

Actually, I don't have the spare time to join another forum game. My apologies, Friend Computer.

Please enter a retirement booth at your nearest convenience. Failure to enter a retirement booth in a timely manner is treason.

[tahujdt]

Actually, I don't have the spare time to join another forum game. My apologies, Friend Computer.

Please enter a retirement booth at your nearest convenience. Failure to enter a retirement booth in a timely manner is treason.

Friend Computer had previously declared that he would not force anyone who was busy to become a Troubleshooter, because they had already selflessly overburdened themselves in his service. You are giving an order contrary to The Computer, which is treason. In addition, you falsely accused another citizen of treason, which is treason.

[GreatWyrmGold]

Actually, I don't have the spare time to join another forum game. My apologies, Friend Computer.

Please enter a retirement booth at your nearest convenience. Failure to enter a retirement booth in a timely manner is treason.

Friend Computer had previously declared that he would not force anyone who was busy to become a Troubleshooter, because they had already selflessly overburdened themselves in his service. You are giving an order contrary to The Computer, which is treason. In addition, you falsely accused another citizen of treason, which is treason.

Au contrare. Giglamesh was expressing disinterest in not merely being a Troubleshooter, but in participating in Alpha Complex activities of any sort. A citizen who does not wish to participate in participating in Alpha Complex activities of any sort is instructed to enter a retirement booth in a timely manner, so as to receive a pleasant retirement. Making false claims about Alpha Complex policy is treason. Moreover, defending a treasonous citizen is treason. Moreover, accusing a loyal citizen of treason is treason.