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[GreatWyrmGold]

Cast the spell on Thuun, letting him fly! And, you know, move under his own power. When he wakes up. Until then, it'll make him easier to carry without dragging him!

You'll have to concentrate on the spell, which will likely incur a penalty to other magic until Thuun wakes up and can control it himself. You're not quite good enough to let the running spell just sit at the back of your mind, unlike with alacrity. Hold it for a few turns and it'll become second nature, though.

Dang. I need to figure out how to enchant stuff, or bind it to his will, or something.

Huh. I was about to tell you what'd happen on a six when I remembered you have a dynamic bonus. Damn, I wanted him to fly off Team Rocket style.

Like I don't have enough of an undeserved reputation for horrible miscasts.

[Niccolo]

We're blasting of againnnnn... *ping*

It's much less funny when you figure out so much electrical interference would give them constant strokes, not to mention how many fractures and spine breakages they might have had.

It's a show that features a magical turtle that could solve every water shortage problem forever, another that can punch you so hard you hit the moon and a special move that not only renders entire money-based economies broken but is perfectly legal and used only for the purposes of beating others up..

I don't see why logic would even apply.

[Mighty_Soulz]

((What I can't quite work out is how BFEL's character is even still alive, even in a dream sequence. Didn't his legs just get ripped in half?))

[Execute/Dumbo.exe]

We're blasting of againnnnn... *ping*

It's much less funny when you figure out so much electrical interference would give them constant strokes, not to mention how many fractures and spine breakages they might have had.

It's a show that features a magical turtle that could solve every water shortage problem forever, another that can punch you so hard you hit the moon and a special move that not only renders entire money-based economies broken but is perfectly legal and used only for the purposes of beating others up..

I don't see why logic would even apply.

Also a hive mind fungus colony inside a nigh indestructible shell whose juices from fruits out inside its body is normally seen as completely healthy and totally not infected with fungus colonies.

Quick! Everybody start talking about Pokemon from their description alone!

[Niccolo]

((What I can't quite work out is how BFEL's character is even still alive, even in a dream sequence. Didn't his legs just get ripped in half?))

They were previously roasted quite thoroughly into something approaching well-done. That tends to destroy any chance of him bleeding out. Although given the way his opponentsfellow adventurers are going, he's probably going to die soon.

[Pancaek]

"Well, that was almost as unpleasant as that time I was in the middle of sea when both the flu and scurvy broke out amongst the crew. Fun times and explosive Diarrhea for all."

Go to here the shiny is at. Inspect shiny. If shiny seems harmless enough, acquire shiny

[Harry Baldman]

"So... do we take the legs with us? They seem rather well-done. Maybe we can find a use for them."

Grab roasted legs. They shouldn't be too hard to remove from the ground, right? And if they are, just break off whatever pieces I can and pocket them for later.

[BFEL]

((What I can't quite work out is how BFEL's character is even still alive, even in a dream sequence. Didn't his legs just get ripped in half?))

((Cauterization via lava. Hell of a procedure ))

[Niccolo]

"So... do we take the legs with us? They seem rather well-done. Maybe we can find a use for them."

Grab roasted legs. They shouldn't be too hard to remove from the ground, right? And if they are, just break off whatever pieces I can and pocket them for later.

Lyu Brak. Itinerant priest, amateur apothecary, cannibal.

[Mighty_Soulz]

Lyu Brak. Itinerant priest, amateur apothecary, cannibal. definitely not a surgeon

Only as long as he doesn't plan to eat them, methinks it would burn his mouth....

[Niccolo]

Only as long as he doesn't plan to eat them, methinks it would burn his mouth....

God I hope not. Some priest he'd be.

[USEC_OFFICER]

"Shit. Uh... if you want to carry his legs around, do it. You aren't putting them in my pack though."

Carry Thuun to the carriage and put him in it.

[Niccolo]

- Turn 23: Nope, No Plot -

Cast the spell on Thuun, letting him fly! And, you know, move under his own power. When he wakes up. Until then, it'll make him easier to carry without dragging him!

(1+1) Thuun just sorta flops around a bit.

"So... do we take the legs with us? They seem rather well-done. Maybe we can find a use for them."

Grab roasted legs. They shouldn't be too hard to remove from the ground, right? And if they are, just break off whatever pieces I can and pocket them for later.

“So… uh… Hm.” You decide to try and tear the bits of roasted flesh from their earthen prisons, even though there is no story ever which started with that line and ended well.

You try and grab the leggy bits by the flesh, but no dice; it just sorta tears off more. Ew. Probably best to leave them there. What the hell were you going to do with dead and cooked legs, anyway?

Rations?

"Shit. Uh... if you want to carry his legs around, do it. You aren't putting them in my pack though."

Carry Thuun to the carriage and put him in it.

You pick up the flopping not-quite-corpse of Thuun and lever him into the charred carriage. Nobody’s sure why, since the horse probably bolted as soon as the monsters showed up and the carriage driver was riding the horse.

The village nearby might just have another horse in it? Hopefully? And driving the carriage can’t be too hard.

"Well, that was almost as unpleasant as that time I was in the middle of sea when both the flu and scurvy broke out amongst the crew. Fun times and explosive Diarrhea for all."

Go to where the shiny is at. Inspect shiny. If shiny seems harmless enough, acquire shiny

You recount the truly horrifying story for anybody who will listen; strangely, everyone avoids you afterwards. Nobody will make eye contact with you. So you shrug and leave to investigate the shiny in the woods.

(4) Well how about that. It’s a bracelet. Looks like a Limerete one, too! A band of copper, inscribed with sharp designs in a style favoured by some of the smaller Limerete islands. It shimmers in the golden sunlight as you pick it up; a small tingle passes through your hand. It’s probably worth a fair bit!

Coooooool.

Take the advice of the dead Sun God and get the hell out.

You back away from the vista in front of you before turning and bolting through the door and passing into blackness. As you do so, the voice whispers into your mind again. ”Very well, young mage… I shall release your mind back into the web of dreams. We shall meet again…”

The blackness around you thickens and tears. You fall and land face-first on rock. You stand woozily and dust yourself off - really wishing for once you’d dream about clothing - before looking around.

Huh. The rock is something black, but not obsidian… It smells a bit like the bubbling, black pits that spell doom for anything that wanders into them. It’s laid in neat… lines. It’s a road? Maybe? You’ve never seen a road like this. Buildings soar up around you, just like the one you lay upon some time ago. This must be how they appear from the ground?

You hear a weird sort of hissing, whirring sound from your right. A man is sitting at a table, the first man you’ve ever met in this weird dream, apart from the elves from the strange message. The table is a simple wooden affair. The man is playing with a child’s spinning top; that’s where that whirring sound is coming from. Weird.

The buildings are gone. Just… gone. it’s like you took your eyes off of them and they evaporated like a puddle in the sunlight. You’re standing in hard-packed sand now and the light is dizzyingly bright from marble walls around you… Ah. it’s a coliseum. And you’re apparently the main event.

The mayor of Shas Isa is watching you.  A horde of him is watching you. Seven feet tall and built like an ox, an army of hulkified mayors are hooting and yelling as they cheer your demise from the stands.

There is a loud rumble from behind you. You turn to look and see a carriage bearing down on you! The carriage is carved in the shape of a drago-wait, no, it actually is a dragon. Breathing fire. And it looks hungry.

Through all of this, Cyrus had been standing around watching the surroundings.

Spoiler: The Players (click to show/hide)

Lyu Brak (Harry Baldman)
Profession: Priest
Status: Ew.
Inventory:
Staff (Bronze-Capped)
Religious Necklace
Warm Priestly Robes and Pants
Warm Priestly Shoes
180 gold
10 Jimsonweed Fruit
Bits of Thuun’s legs
Wounds/Status: You're perfectly healthy!
Abilities: [Boundlessly Cheerful] [The Good Priest] [Not that faithful] [Righteous Litany (2/6)]

Baldur Bergfalk (USEC_OFFICER)
Profession: Mercenary
Status: Sticking Life mages in strange places
Inventory:
Broken greatsword
Worn leather jerkin (and normal clothes)
Worn leather boots
Bear fur cloak
300 gold
Wounds/Status: [Burned Left Hand (Palm) (4/8)] [Slashed left eye]
Abilities: [Skilled Bargainer] [Guileless] [I'm Not Right Handed]

Lao Thuun (BFEL)
Profession: Warrior Mage
Status: Still dreaming. Seriously dude, wake up.
Inventory:
Blunted bronze sword
Leather armour and boots
Acolyte's Suncloak
210 gold
Wounds/Status: [Totally Mutilated Legs] [Coma]
Abilities:
[Enduring] [Atoner] [Spellsword]
Spells:
[Life Spell: Wisp]
Magical Experience:
[Ea: 0] [Wi: 0] [Fi: 0] [Wa: 0] [Li: 2] [Fo: -1] [Lt: 0] [Sh: 0]

Felice Nasib (Pancaek)
Profession: Seaman
Status: Finding shinies
Inventory:
Repaired Shortbow
Eighteen Arrows
Razor-sharp Dirk
Nautical Longcoat and Boots
313 gold
Shiny Copper Bracelet
Wounds/Status: You're perfectly healthy!
Abilities:
[Fearless] [Not a Landlubber] [Trick Shot]

Ekoka (GreatWyrmGold)
Profession: Wanderer
Status: Nope!
Inventory:
Cracked shillelagh
Wanderer's Cloak
Sturdy Clothes and Boots
Length of Rope
Flint and Tinder
380 gold
Wounds/Status: [Splitting Headache (1/2)]
Abilities:
[Survivalist] [Dual Focus] [Slow Cast] [Maladjusted to heat] [Guiding Spirit]
Spells:
[Wind Spell: Alacrity]
Magical Experience:
[Ea: 0] [Wi: 1] [Fi: 0] [Wa: 0] [Li: 0] [Fo: 0] [Lt: 0] [Sh: 0]

[Execute/Dumbo.exe]

Look, you really don't need to update this quickly, I'm not complaining but... You know, sleep is nice once in a while.

I'm just joking really, but wow, you update quick and with high quality at an unnerving rate, also, I'm very interested in that small throwaway text about the shiver going through his hand.

[Niccolo]

Dude, I'm the same timezone as you, just about. I live on the west coast, it's only 5:30 pm here

But anyway, thanks! Nice to know I'm maintaining good quality. Compliments are always welcome; they're wonderful for my ego.