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Total Members Voted: 16


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Author Topic: The Derail Games: A game of Awesome Chess.  (Read 171979 times)

mastahcheese

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Re: The Derail Games: Where da wifi at?
« Reply #1545 on: June 29, 2014, 12:31:37 pm »

BUMP BUMP

Screw it.

You can feel yourself laying against a hard metal.
You can't see anything.
What now?
Logged
Oh look, I have a steam account.
Might as well chalk it up to Pathos.
As this point we might as well invoke interpretive dance and call it a day.
The Derail Thread

NAV

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Re: The Derail Games: Where da wifi at?
« Reply #1546 on: June 29, 2014, 12:40:58 pm »

Lick metal. Identify metal by flavour.
Logged
Highmax…dead, flesh torn from him, though his skill with the sword was unmatched…military…Nearly destroyed .. Rhunorah... dead... Mastahcheese returns...dead. Gaul...alive, still locked in combat. NAV...Alive, drinking booze....
The face on the toaster does not look like one of mercy.

darkpaladin109

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Re: The Derail Games: Where da wifi at?
« Reply #1547 on: June 29, 2014, 12:42:53 pm »

Lick metal. Identify metal by flavour.
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mastahcheese

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Re: The Derail Games: Where da wifi at?
« Reply #1548 on: June 29, 2014, 02:24:34 pm »

You realize that you are laying facing upwards.
As you try to turn your head to reach it, it bumps into a wall.
It seems that you are in a very, very cramped location.
A high pitched whine begins, and starts to grow in intensity.
Logged
Oh look, I have a steam account.
Might as well chalk it up to Pathos.
As this point we might as well invoke interpretive dance and call it a day.
The Derail Thread

flabort

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Re: The Derail Games: Where da wifi at?
« Reply #1549 on: June 29, 2014, 03:06:58 pm »

Whine at the same intensity.
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The Cyan Menace

Went away for a while, came back, went away for a while, and back for now.

NAV

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Re: The Derail Games: Where da wifi at?
« Reply #1550 on: June 29, 2014, 04:38:57 pm »

Logged
Highmax…dead, flesh torn from him, though his skill with the sword was unmatched…military…Nearly destroyed .. Rhunorah... dead... Mastahcheese returns...dead. Gaul...alive, still locked in combat. NAV...Alive, drinking booze....
The face on the toaster does not look like one of mercy.

highmax28

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just shot him with a balistic arrow, i think he will get stuned from that >.>

"Guardian" and Sigfriend Of Necrothreat
Jee wilikers, I think Highmax is near invulnerable, must have been dunked in the river styx like achilles was.
Just make sure he wears a boot.

darkpaladin109

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Elephant Parade

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Re: The Derail Games: Where da wifi at?
« Reply #1553 on: June 29, 2014, 07:59:28 pm »

Attempt to do a Moonwalking Worm to surprise the spambot.
Error: unknown command.

Learn report spell as we kick the spambot in the face!
That's not how you learn a spell!
>kick
[roll: 16-4 vs. 12][roll: 4]
You kick the spambot, inflicting 4 damage. Critical hit! The spambot is stunned! You have unlocked Tutorial: Critical Hits!


Wait until Toady One finds us  proceed to grovel if executable.
Noncombat commands will not be executed in combat unless they have a majority vote.

Spoiler: Critical Hits (click to show/hide)
« Last Edit: June 29, 2014, 08:09:32 pm by Elephant Parade »
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Zanzetkuken The Great

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Re: The Derail Games: Where da wifi at?
« Reply #1555 on: June 29, 2014, 11:02:25 pm »

Are completely arbitarily thought up games still welcome in this thread?  It's been awhile since I was last here...

Spoiler: Anyway, the game (click to show/hide)
« Last Edit: June 30, 2014, 12:03:23 am by Zanzetkuken The Great »
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Quote from: Eric Blank
It's Zanzetkuken The Great. He's a goddamn wizard-dragon. He will make it so, and it will forever be.
Quote from: 2016 Election IRC
<DozebomLolumzalis> you filthy god-damn ninja wizard dragon

4maskwolf

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Re: The Derail Games: Where da wifi at?
« Reply #1556 on: June 29, 2014, 11:10:18 pm »

For Zanzet: 4maskwolf on team troll.

flabort

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Re: The Derail Games: Where da wifi at?
« Reply #1557 on: June 29, 2014, 11:56:04 pm »

For Zanzet: Flabort on team Me Gusta.

I delayed to long. Update for Roll to Wifi may take longer than usual. But I am now working on it.
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The Cyan Menace

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Scotsmen

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Re: The Derail Games: Where da wifi at?
« Reply #1558 on: June 30, 2014, 12:03:41 am »

Oh. Yes. I am in. Scotsmen on team Rage!
Logged
As he waits to be unrestrained and taken backstage, he can't help but think I miss my fun bits.

flabort

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Re: The Derail Games: Where da wifi at?
« Reply #1559 on: June 30, 2014, 12:19:10 am »

Kill inferior robot using eye lasers.
[5]The robot is inferior to your biomechanical hybrid cyborg powers. You melt it down to reveal your own still beating heart inside, rapidly sprouting the parts to build a second you out of the molten robot.
You are then immediately destroyed yourself by acid and lightning. [1] Your clone does not retain your memories, just your desire to kill humanity. And is not fully formed. And you didn't manage to uplink yourself to a nearby wifi signal because there weren't any, so you basically lost all your possessions and your identity.

USING METKNOWLAGE, DESTROY ELEPHANT PARADE'S HACK ON MY ROUTER
[2]You fail to have Metknowlage. The little paperclip guy suggests, did you mean Metaknowledge?

Secure my computer from hacking, then pack up and go home to get a nice dinner and a good night's sleep.
[4]You succesfully install redundant firewalls and security. You go home and eat something ethnic, and then go to bed for the night. The noise of the neighbors battling it out with eyelasers is keeping you up, though.

Figure out who stole my wallet. Then kill EXTERMINATE him. And take his wallet. And mine too.
[1] You come to the conclusion that you wallet was stolen by the president of the United States. You hijack a helicopter and fly to the capitol.

Halfway there! WORK MORE! GET PAID!
[3]You do a little more work and then fall asleep. Your face lands on your laptop keyboard, and closes your browser. Nothing else bad happens.

Have giant robot be immune to eye lasers. Then anihilate EP with wizard powers.
[6] The robot is immune to eyelasers by regenerating if it gets destroyed. However, this only causes it to start turning into a clone of EP when he destroys it. [6](seriously?) You call down the wrath of shenanigans, and blow up the original EP in a shower of lightning and pure acid from the sky.

Buy not as cheap router return home
You get the  DuLuxxo brand wireless router. [3] You barely remember to get a cable to go with it so it works, but forget to get the things that make it so that your phones don't explode when you plug them in now.

keep the money, drop the id (while trying not to leave fingerprints?)
dropping stuff is a free action, right?
run jog for the hills.
You sort through the guy's wallet right in front of his house. He rushes past without noticing you, so you just throw his ID back through his open door. You guess he left his door open. [2] You nonchalantly walk back home. No running or jogging, certainly not towards any hills. You're not fit enough. You whistle a little tune.

Spoiler: Status (click to show/hide)

Did I miss anyone?
« Last Edit: June 30, 2014, 12:31:59 am by flabort »
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The Cyan Menace

Went away for a while, came back, went away for a while, and back for now.
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