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Author Topic: The Derail Games: A game of Awesome Chess.  (Read 171693 times)

Lukeinator

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Move up and take cover behind car, overwatch if possible.
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http://www.bay12forums.com/smf/index.php?topic=135480.0 My second FOOTBLEED game.
This thread is Bay12 incarnate.


Like the mermaid bones farm and the Kill-your-baby machine.

fractalman

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from now on, if a wall-attacker wishes to summon a permanent ally, add (summon) to the start of your wall-related post rather than saying "summon x"-the latter will result in a simple attack.

to the munchkins: I had to 'fudge' the damage on this round a bit. half-broken calculator and no cards to roll. 
Quote
Take break, then eat guards.
You do 48 damage! The wallmasters are destroyed and unable to retaliate! 7 additional damage is done to the wall bypassing all security systems, weaknesses, and immunities.  wallmasters don't taste that great, but who cares!

Quote

make highly poisonous chocolate spiders that make you fat and stunned forming them out of the wall, then position them around the dungeon.


If only you’d spoken that bit about greater good to the wall, rather than to the air.   (hmm….)
Still, the wall understands, somewhat, and gives you an impressive 553 bricks to work with. You only waste 53 bricks during the crafting process, leaving the spiders with 500 hp.  You got really lucky, the GWM wasn't actually expecting someone to tap into the wall.  (GWM=Grand Wall Master. note: GWM cannot be targeted.)


wall:
999988282-560=
999987722 hp

hairline cracks: 2/6
cracks:1/10
made of chocolate bark.
The wall is now resistant to naive attempts to simply eat it. It is made of chocolate bark, not Hershey's chocolate.
stunned players: none

other units:
wallmasters:DEAD
maze:
125 hp.
Doubles stun duration of wallmaster(now deceased :(). Protects any units within.
Spiders:
Hp: 500
Patrolling interior of maze
standard attack: poison bite. Stun(1) lethargic(2). 
special: poison player if eaten (no dice roll). stun(1) lethargic(2)
Vulnerable: being eaten x3. (secret weakness) x20.
Composed of semi-liquid high-fat chocolate bark.
« Last Edit: January 16, 2014, 04:39:31 pm by fractalman »
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This is a masterwork ledger.  It contains 3719356 pages on the topic of the precise number and location of stones in Spindlybrooks.  In the text, the dwarves are hauling.
"And here is where we get the undead unicorns. Stop looking at me that way, you should have seen the zombie deer running around last week!"

Elephant Parade

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Heal wall. I still want to know why I was stunned.
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fractalman

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you summoned one too many wallmasters (specifically, you got a jack...I...may change which cards stun you during an attack on the wall/summoning a unit to be only 2's, aces, and kings).

you replace a mere three bricks.
wallhp: 999987725

« Last Edit: January 16, 2014, 04:47:11 pm by fractalman »
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This is a masterwork ledger.  It contains 3719356 pages on the topic of the precise number and location of stones in Spindlybrooks.  In the text, the dwarves are hauling.
"And here is where we get the undead unicorns. Stop looking at me that way, you should have seen the zombie deer running around last week!"

Execute/Dumbo.exe

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(summon) use the at least half of the given bricks to form some more wallmasters! Making them also dangerously high in fat content, causing stuns from eating them!
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He knows how to fix River's tiredness.
Alan help.
Quote
IronyOwl   But Kyuubey can more or less be summed up as "You didn't ask."
15:52   IronyOwl   Whereas Dungbeetle is closer to "Fuck you."

fractalman

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Thanks.  [/slightly sarcastic]. Now I have to devise actual mechanics to convert base damage into summon hp...
-you have been granted a free courtesy round while the GWM puts your summon on hold.
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This is a masterwork ledger.  It contains 3719356 pages on the topic of the precise number and location of stones in Spindlybrooks.  In the text, the dwarves are hauling.
"And here is where we get the undead unicorns. Stop looking at me that way, you should have seen the zombie deer running around last week!"

Elephant Parade

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Cast a spell of protection upon the wall!
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mastahcheese

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  • Now with 20% less sanity and trans fat!
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Make a flamethrower and melt the dang choco-spiders.



We're just waiting on Darkpaladin again, no worries.
« Last Edit: January 16, 2014, 09:53:14 pm by mastahcheese »
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Oh look, I have a steam account.
Might as well chalk it up to Pathos.
As this point we might as well invoke interpretive dance and call it a day.
The Derail Thread

flabort

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Turn up the power of the Sun.
Just as a reminder, the odds for the X-COM game are:
3:4 they die in <=7 turns
1:2 (2:4) they die in <=5 turns
1:4 they die in <=3 turns (next turn is 3rd turn, iirc)
1:4 they survive >7 turns
1:6 they complete the mission

And as another reminder, anyone can bet tokens. You start with 50 if you haven't bet fl-ABORT tokens before, and may bet more than you have as long as it's a real number (no i or infinity, those both count as 1). And also they aren't real money, etc. etc. but I plan on using them in a mid-far future RtD.
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The Cyan Menace

Went away for a while, came back, went away for a while, and back for now.

mastahcheese

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Well, I doubt it'll be three turns, since they just used up the second one by sitting there doing nothing.
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Oh look, I have a steam account.
Might as well chalk it up to Pathos.
As this point we might as well invoke interpretive dance and call it a day.
The Derail Thread

fractalman

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Cast a spell of protection upon the wall!

you reinforce the walls overall hp by 136 hp!
The cracks in the wall are temporarily inaccessible!(1)

Make a flamethrower and melt the dang choco-spiders.


You fire your flamethrower, doing 158 damage!
300-158=142

The spiders attempt to bite you!
7v10.
The spiders manage to bite you, stunning you and bloating you!
Turn up the power of the Sun.


A critical hit! You somehow get a hold of a dial for the sun, but when you try to crank it up past 10, you get shocked!  stunned(1).

At least you did 185 damage, and rendered the wall vulnerable to being simply eaten again. unfortunately, this has also applied another one-turn patch to the cracks in the wall (cracks off +1)

wall hp:

wall:
999987725-185+136
=999987676 hp

hairline cracks: 2/6
cracks:1/10
The cracks are non-functional!(2)

made of chocolate bark, softened by the sun.
The wall can be eaten freely again...but perhaps there's something else you'd like to try?

other units:
wallmasters:DEAD...for now.
chocoalte wallmasters: pending.
Maze:
125 hp.
Doubles stun duration of wallmaster(now deceased :(). Protects any units within.
Spiders:
Hp: 142
Patrolling interior of maze
standard attack: poison bite. Stun(1) lethargic(2). 
special: poison player if eaten (no dice roll). stun(1) lethargic(2)
Vulnerable: being eaten x3. (secret weakness) x20.
Composed of semi-liquid high-fat chocolate bark.

stunned players:
mastahchees(1) bloated(2)
flabort(1)
Logged
This is a masterwork ledger.  It contains 3719356 pages on the topic of the precise number and location of stones in Spindlybrooks.  In the text, the dwarves are hauling.
"And here is where we get the undead unicorns. Stop looking at me that way, you should have seen the zombie deer running around last week!"

Elephant Parade

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Power up my magic!
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mastahcheese

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Cast "Unbloat Self"
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Oh look, I have a steam account.
Might as well chalk it up to Pathos.
As this point we might as well invoke interpretive dance and call it a day.
The Derail Thread

fractalman

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Cast "Unbloat Self"
you are stunned, nothing happens. :(
Power up my magic!
congratulations!...
you gain a +25% boost to your next move.

wall: 999987676 hp

hairline cracks: 2/6
cracks:1/10
The cracks are non-functional!(2)

made of chocolate bark, softened by the sun.
The wall can be eaten freely again...but perhaps there's something else you'd like to try?

other units:
wallmasters:DEAD...for now.
chocoalte wallmasters: pending.
Maze:
125 hp.
Doubles stun duration of wallmaster(now deceased :(). Protects any units within.
Spiders:
Hp: 142
Patrolling interior of maze
standard attack: poison bite. Stun(1) lethargic(2). 
special: poison player if eaten (no dice roll). stun(1) lethargic(2)
Vulnerable: being eaten x3. (secret weakness) x20.
Composed of semi-liquid high-fat chocolate bark.

player status:

mastahcheese: bloated(1)
elephant parade: +25%power(1)
« Last Edit: January 16, 2014, 11:44:46 pm by fractalman »
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This is a masterwork ledger.  It contains 3719356 pages on the topic of the precise number and location of stones in Spindlybrooks.  In the text, the dwarves are hauling.
"And here is where we get the undead unicorns. Stop looking at me that way, you should have seen the zombie deer running around last week!"

Elephant Parade

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Fire a laser at the heroes.
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