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Option 1
- 7 (21.2%)
Option 2
- 11 (33.3%)
Option 3
- 5 (15.2%)
Option 4
- 10 (30.3%)

Total Members Voted: 16


Pages: 1 ... 35 36 [37] 38 39 ... 134

Author Topic: The Derail Games: A game of Awesome Chess.  (Read 170246 times)

mastahcheese

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Wait, so it's an interactive LP as a mock forum game?
You say this like I haven't done this before.
Logged
Oh look, I have a steam account.
Might as well chalk it up to Pathos.
As this point we might as well invoke interpretive dance and call it a day.
The Derail Thread

flabort

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Wait, so it's an interactive LP as a mock forum game?
You say this like I haven't done this before.
He has done it before. I correctly divined what he was asking for volunteers for and didn't want to volunteer until I'd seen how it works one more time...
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The Cyan Menace

Went away for a while, came back, went away for a while, and back for now.

Zanzetkuken The Great

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  • The Wizard Dragon
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Be the leader of the Goblin Republic.
Check on treaties
Check on military strength of Republic
Get known details of nearby nations
Logged
Quote from: Eric Blank
It's Zanzetkuken The Great. He's a goddamn wizard-dragon. He will make it so, and it will forever be.
Quote from: 2016 Election IRC
<DozebomLolumzalis> you filthy god-damn ninja wizard dragon

mastahcheese

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Wait, so it's an interactive LP as a mock forum game?
You say this like I haven't done this before.
He has done it before. I correctly divined what he was asking for volunteers for and didn't want to volunteer until I'd seen how it works one more time...
I was actually having this be the last test before making an actual thread in the LP sub-forum.
That one will be on normal difficulty, rather than impossible, the way this one is.
Logged
Oh look, I have a steam account.
Might as well chalk it up to Pathos.
As this point we might as well invoke interpretive dance and call it a day.
The Derail Thread

fractalman

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take cover behind the mailbox/trashcan. 
-Not the best cover, I imagine, but I don't even see the aliens yet...
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This is a masterwork ledger.  It contains 3719356 pages on the topic of the precise number and location of stones in Spindlybrooks.  In the text, the dwarves are hauling.
"And here is where we get the undead unicorns. Stop looking at me that way, you should have seen the zombie deer running around last week!"

Elephant Parade

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Drop a grenade right in front of me, blowing up the whole team.

Hide behind the truck.
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mastahcheese

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I'm going to go ahead and put up some advertising here for Mainspring.
We could always use more crewmen and ship designers.
Just waiting on Darkpaladin109.
Bump.
So how about them fan arts, EP?
Put me down for 150 fl-ABORT tokens that EP, DP109, Luke, and fractal will get killed in my X-COM game within 7 turns.
Popcheck.
Logged
Oh look, I have a steam account.
Might as well chalk it up to Pathos.
As this point we might as well invoke interpretive dance and call it a day.
The Derail Thread

Elephant Parade

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I'm going to go ahead and put up some advertising here for Mainspring.
We could always use more crewmen and ship designers.
Just waiting on Darkpaladin109.
Bump.
So how about them fan arts, EP?
Put me down for 150 fl-ABORT tokens that EP, DP109, Luke, and fractal will get killed in my X-COM game within 7 turns.
Popcheck.
I have this thing from a while ago that I keep forgetting to post.



MERRY JANUARY
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highmax28

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I think mastacheese is right; I think I'm going insane just looking at how epic and ridiculous your artworks are... Keep it coming! :P

Enter as Terminator Squad from space hulk! Purge the Xenos! (Is that like space hulk? It sounds and looks similar)
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just shot him with a balistic arrow, i think he will get stuned from that >.>

"Guardian" and Sigfriend Of Necrothreat
Jee wilikers, I think Highmax is near invulnerable, must have been dunked in the river styx like achilles was.
Just make sure he wears a boot.

darkpaladin109

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Hide behind truck.
((Couldn't post earlier, sorry.))
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Dorsidwarf

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Chapter 2: Bloodmoon

Unite the independent unaligned states into the Last empire, become emperor of it.
Your fledgeling empire is slaughtered by a coalition of states. So are you. You are dead.

Be emperor of my empire here. the northern reaches one, or at least the ruler of that place.
You are Greg Rothild. Before war broke out, you were the opposition leader for the Northern Reaches. Now, you're a sub-lieutenant on the Rear Lines, about six miles of twisting trench from the no-man's land. You have 100 men under your command, standing orders to recieve and direct troops for the front, a mission to defend Wreckton rail station, and a telephone line to battalion HQ.

Have pet elephant. Ride it into battle.
You briefly entertain thoughts of heading the local city, Vok, and stealing an elephant to charge across the no-man's land wire. Over-technician Fredrick Kirdef shouts at you to stop daydreaming a few minutes of glorious carnage later.

Bug captain Vash into giving me my mission
Vash snarls at you when you barge in on a meeting, and assigns you three men and a 'mission'. By which I mean, get a lift over to the even more brutal fighting of the Western Goblin Front, sneak across five hundred yards of barbed wire, machine gun posts, and artillery, kill a cat, and get back. Alive. The men are, understandably, very angry about this.

Give Lieutenant Rilk mission to assasinate Mister Tad, a cat serving the enemy forces.
He made you cross, so you gave him a suicide mission with literally no purpose in the unlikely case of completion. You feel pleased with yourself briefly, then get back to receiving the actual mission brief from HQ. You are to infiltrate the northern Lines, and seize the Wreck from enemy hands. This will be ludicrously dangerous, albeit with a massive potential payoff in strategic terms. You are feeling margainally less smug about sending one of your lieutenants to his death, but he's already left by the time you leave the dugout to apologize.

Sacrifice to the Norse gods and ready the longships. Everyone still armed with an axe? Or are we in a later time where axes got upgraded to guns?
You smash a bottle of fine champagne on the bow of your AM-'Longboat' submarine, and prepare to dive. You are Beth Trikslow, a Valhallan submarine commander. There are four submarines in your pack, and your orders are to harry Goblin military shipping off the South Isle. The submarines are armed with thirty 'Axehead' torpedoes each, and an eighty-millimeter deck gun.

Dig in, and have my men create a bunker to reduce incoming fire.
After checking that the Goblin's aren;t actually attacking, you ask the soldiers to pick up shovels. A few hours of work later, they've a series of zig-zag trenches down to waist height along about a half-mile of the Line. The other companies who are watching the no-man's land are grateful, as this severely reduces the chances of them suddenly exploding due to artillery, or keeling over after sniper fire. You put tin sheeting over your dugout to keep the rain out, and stack wooden crates on the floor to keep your feet out of the mud.

I have two flashlights.  I (naively?) assume that since both flashlights are part of my starting equipment, both have decent battery life.

Start using one flashlight in tandem with fine brush in the vicinity of the word fragments.

You start examining the fragments of metal with the words engraved into it. They seem somewhat similar to words in your notepad, so you examine them more closely. After some serious comparison between confirmed letters and the symbols, you determine the first shard to have 'MA*N C*M*-', ending in a smashed, jagged edge. The other is really very damaged. After closer inspection of it, it seems like the metal was smashed off something, possibly by the force of the Crash.
((You have ONE flashlight, and two word fragments.))

Patrol for mice, rodents, vermin, and enemies to the state.
The rats are refusing to come out in the rain, and you ate all the mice.


Split my men into three parties, one each under each of my sub-inquisitors, and one under myself, split up and investigate the three nearest fires.
You take your lackey to the largest fire, and in the charred wreck of the building where it started, you find a thick safe and a spiked implement, as well as what appears to be half of a skull, twisted and covered in slagged roof tile.

Popcheck.
The Free Cities comprises of roughly one and a half million citizens.

Be the leader of the Goblin Republic.
Check on treaties
Check on military strength of Republic
Get known details of nearby nations

You are sadly not the leader of the glorious Goblin Republic. You are an underclerk in his office. Your name is Kik Filnass. You know that you are neutral with Valhalla currently, and at war with both the Free Cities and the North Reaches. The complex, shifting political state in the unaligned zone is barely even worth paying attention to, let alone recording. Some dictator was overthrown yesterday apparently, and his conquerors then started shooting each other.
The Goblin Republic is of course the mightiest. Twenty-seven divisions split into five armies across two fronts. All other nations are worthless, and will be brushed aside at the Republic's convenience.

You read the Leader's mail. You are fairly sure most of that is trash.



Spoiler: Goblin Republic (click to show/hide)

Spoiler: North Reaches (click to show/hide)


Spoiler: Valhalla (click to show/hide)




Map of the Torn Isle



Map of the Lines






[/center]
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Quote from: Rodney Ootkins
Everything is going to be alright

Xantalos

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Go patrol among the company. Try to raise morale amongst the troops.
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Sig! Onol
Quote from: BFEL
XANTALOS, THE KARATEBOMINATION
Quote from: Toaster
((The Xantalos Die: [1, 1, 1, 6, 6, 6]))

highmax28

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Quote
You smash a bottle of fine champagne on the bow of your AM-'Longboat' submarine, and prepare to dive. You are Beth Trikslow, a Valhallan submarine commander. There are four submarines in your pack, and your orders are to harry Goblin military shipping off the South Isle. The submarines are armed with thirty 'Axehead' torpedoes each, and an eighty-millimeter deck gun.
Blockade the island; nothing gets in, nothing gets out. Fire on anything that does so. If they send forces, fire off torpedoes. If they send in shipping and cargo vessels, fire off the deck guns until they surrender or they are sunk. If they surrender, take all their goods and hold them prisoner. Send them to the mainland for slave labor and questioning. Strip them of all arms and ammo as well, sending them mainland as well.
Logged
just shot him with a balistic arrow, i think he will get stuned from that >.>

"Guardian" and Sigfriend Of Necrothreat
Jee wilikers, I think Highmax is near invulnerable, must have been dunked in the river styx like achilles was.
Just make sure he wears a boot.

Elephant Parade

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Begin construction of elephant mech. Wonder what happened to giant war machine being constructed in previous game.
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Coolrune206

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Call in extra supplies to build machine gun turrets that barely just have guns poking out of the trenches. Arrange for some soldiers to have rockets in case of armored attacks.
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"You are a shameful gaggle of cowards who has made a mockery of the challenge, but you have avoided death. Sit and eat."
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