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It was inevitable

15 (42.9%)

Winners don't do drugs

6 (17.1%)

I'll be back

2 (5.7%)

Drink the Kool Aid

6 (17.1%)

Groovy

3 (8.6%)

Insane in the membrane

3 (8.6%)

Total Members Voted: 35

[Sir Elventide]

♚The Doll Prince: On the Doorstep ♚

Napoleon smiled at Svajoklis. It was not often that the Doll Prince met someone who shared a common interest with the most renowned Frenchman the early modern world had ever seen. Clearly, Napoleon has much to live up to, being pretty obscure up until now. However, he'd possessed the intellect and the will to make things happen so all is not lost.

"I do intend to make good on my word, Monseigneur Svajoklis," Napoleon answered, giving a respectful bow.

As Svajoklis inquired out loud on how best to break through a door and deal with any enemies on the other side, Napoleon rubbed his chin. Usually, the best way to go about in this situation by to use explosives, either to blow the door and surprise the ambushers with a bum-rush while they're distracted by the shrapnel and smoke or to pry the door open normally and throw in an explosive to kill and maim the enemy. However, as they were inside a huge spaceship inside what is basically a literally drowned universe. Instead, he would have to do this the old-fashioned way.

"No doubt the enemy are waiting on the other side of this door to charge anyone who open it," Napoleon finally said. "Fortunately, there is a two-pronged way to counter or at least soften up this eventuality. Here's what we can do: I will summon a detachment of combatants in front of the door while the volunteers open the door, taking care not to be in front of it when they do so, instead being off to the sides. Once the door is opened, the enemy will no doubt swarm  whoever it sees first, in this case being my detachment. They will clash with my detachment, which will hold firm, allowing the one's who'd opened the doors to either pinch the enemy group with an attach from both sides or fall back to a safer location. If everything fall into place, not only will the enemy lose the element of surprise but will lose many if not all of their numbers in a trap they rushed headlong into."

Pausing, Napoleon continued, "Of course, if the enemy decide to bid their time and let us walk into whatever trap they lay for us, allow me to see some of my combatants into the room. There, I will scout out the room for the enemy, seeing and hearing everything the scouts sense, and will either find them or blunder into their trap. This will force them to waste their efforts on expendable units that I can replenish effortlessly and the rest of my detachment can hold any who try to leave the room through this door."

Execute the plan if the others agree. If someone has a better plan, use dolls to help out.

[DarkArtemisFowl]

((Sorry for the short post. My laptop has been broken and I've had to send it in for repair. I'm posting from phone.))

Continue with the Eastern Gate option. Make getting everyone out safely a priority. Their forces shouldn't be concentrating on us, as we're not the main threat to them.

[ANGRY_DEMON_NOISES]

((Since my first character was a boring edgelord, I present you, Straia.))

Spoiler: Crickey! (click to show/hide)

Name: SIV7 (STEVE IRWIN V7)

Ability: By eating an animal whole, SIV can gain it's most famous attribute. He also has minor animal empathy powers.

Appearance: A fusion of man, beast, and Steve Irwin, its teeth are like needles, it's skin is as dark as night and its hat quite dandy mate.

Bio/Personality info: Oi, so you want to learn my story mate? Well, I was born in the year 2500 during the Second Emu war, those lil' buggers are tricky cunts I tell you. So the Prime Minista, or Andy as we like to call him, called some blokes and told them to make a superweapon, and that's me history mate

.

[Xantalos]

((Since my first character was a boring edgelord, I present

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

you, Straia.))
Name: SIV7 (STEVE IRWIN V7)
Ability: By eating a living organism smaller than itself, SIV7 can gain it's most notorious attribute, like the web fluid organ thing of a spider or the smooth and dumb brain of the Koala, or the evil mind of the nefarious Emu.
Appearance: A fusion of man, beast, and Steve Irwin, its teeth are like needles, it's skin is as dark as night and its hat quite dandy mate.
Bio/Personality info: Oi, so you want to learn my story mate? Well, I was born in the year 2500 during the Second Emu war, those lil' buggers are tricky cunts I tell you. So the Prime Minista, or Andy as we like to call him, called some blokes and told them to male a superweapon, and that's me history mate

.

((...I'd like to ask you for permission to write an extended backstory for this dude, keeping to the same general sort of thing. For some reason this is making my muse scream at me with ideas.
...
Know what, I'm gonna do it regardless, your choice whether you accept it or not of course.))

[ANGRY_DEMON_NOISES]

((Feel free mate, I can't stop ya bloody muse.))

[Xantalos]

Spoiler: The Wild Man, Protector of Nature, Steve Irwin (and also wizard X-COM) (click to show/hide)

The world as we once knew it died in mutagenic fire. Spurred by the ever-widening gap between ideologies on opposing sides of the political spectrum, pushed and prodded by exceedingly wealthy corporations and individuals with nothing better to do with their time, worldwide war broke out between the nations of the Old World, a war like nothing seen before or since. Global nuclear holocaust was just the beginning; as opposing superpowers grew more and more desperate, old projects better left dead were dug up, remnants of an institutionalized attempt at harnessing the occult. Thus did swarms of techno-organic horrors flood out of the Divided States to clash against the elemental legions of Super Serbia. Cults to ancient horrors sprung up in the geopolitical madness of world war 3, and cthuloid entities crawled out of the sea to put an end to all humanoid life. They purged the coastlines and swept five hundred miles inward before being halted by a desperate coalition of shamans, wizards, and amateur occultists from the world over, banding together into an organization known as WIZ-COM. Elite teams of immortal wizard commandos struck out at the global clusterfuck for hundreds of years, rescuing the sparse survivors and reforming governments as they went.

When they finally managed to cross the writhing sea of animate bleach and reach Australia's shores, it was with understandable surprise that they found the place mostly unchanged. Sure, the outback was now full of strange sand monsters, flying vampire iguana bat hornet swarms, and other ridiculous amalgamations of nature's savagery, but this wasn't anything to frazzle the friggin' Aussies of all people. Sure, they'd bunkered down and turned their major cities into walled fortresses like most of the rest of the world, but a fair portion of their population lived outside of the walls, coexisting somehow with the mutagenic environment. They claimed they warded off genetic drift and spiritual corruption with some arcane concoction called Vegemite.

Australia's main issue after the first magical bombs had dropped was the way it had affected the emus. For some reason the increased magical radiation in the air had unlocked some vestigal evolutionary evil encoded in the DNA of the creatures, turning them into cunning, evil creatures with an appetite for pecking humans to death and a visceral thirst for the destruction of organized humanoid society. They had begun raiding human settlements almost immediately, and had been advancing their technology, population, and level of organization as the years went on. The tempo of their raids was increasing every year, and they were growing closer and closer to breaching the walls of some of their major cities. It was for this reason that the arrival of WIZ-COM was welcomed. The Australian Prime Minister, an enigmatic being known only as Andy, came to an accord with the organization: Australia would join WIZ-COM and devote resources to their fight against magical evil in exchange for their aid in completing a project they'd been working on for decades with no success. WIZ-COM agreed eagerly and sent their best alchemists and arcane theorists over to the labs in Sydney.

With WIZ-COM's help, the Australian's project began to see some progress for the first time in a long time. Spurred by the visions of well-respected surfer shamans, the Aussie government had been attempting to recreate a bodily vessel for a great Australian hero from times long past, who saw the plight of the animal kingdom under the tyranny of the emu from the spirit world and wanted badly to end their reign of terror. With WIZ-COM's menagerie of magical resources, Australian ingenuity, and a sample of the hero's genome miraculously kept preserved through the ages, the body was constructed and the host spirit summoned into his new corpus. In the year 2500, Steve Irwin was born once more.

In life this Australian legend had known nothing but respect and admiration for all species of animal, seeing their joyous ferocity as an expression of the wondrous variety of life. He had died as he lived, experiencing the natural world without restraint or regret, and traveled to the afterlife content. But the emergence of the emu threat had disturbed him, for these were no longer natural creatures - some evil from another dimension was exerting its effects through the conduit of the emu, and would seek to suborn the natural world that he held dear under their merciless heel should they triumph. Ir-Win would not let such a fate pass, and so was granted a second existence, fused with the essence of beasts most ferocious and gifted the ability to take the best of the natural world into himself. Thusly empowered, he dove into war against the emu, and the tales of his battles against the devious creatures are a thousandfold.

((More writing than I've done all day on my own project constructing an origin story for Magical Flesh Golem Steve Irwin. Muses are odd.))

[ANGRY_DEMON_NOISES]

((Oi, that's  pretty buggering good mate, good on ya))

[ANGRY_DEMON_NOISES]

((Bump))

[Lenglon]

((Bump))

((chill. you've seen the size of Paris's updates. those take a long time to write up. Don't worry, Paris has never failed us, it just takes a bit for updates to come, especially when he's busy.))

[ANGRY_DEMON_NOISES]

((Okay, also now I just realized insects are really fucking OP and will probably give SIV the best powers and attributes...Crikey!))

[Sir Elventide]

((Okay, also now I just realized insects are really fucking OP and will probably give SIV the best powers and attributes...Crikey!))

((At the cost of being susceptible to bug spray, no doubt. ))

[ANGRY_DEMON_NOISES]

((Lofting a 100 times his bodyweight is a good tradeoff  ))

[Egan_BW]

((...That's assuming that you don't get smacked in the face by square-cube law. Smaller is better proportionally, but that does not mean that smaller is better.))

[ANGRY_DEMON_NOISES]

((Damn you Square Cube Law!!!))

[Sir Elventide]

((Damn you Square Cube Law!!!))

Of course, you can just tell physics to go [expletive] itself. If I can create a character who can call forth dolls out of thin air without requiring their equivalent in matter, then you can create your bug Aussie too!