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[Remuthra]

Become king of Not-Hell.

You are kicked in the face by a mime.

Use charisma to become leader of Guantanamo Inmates, initiate rebellion.

(1) You offend the local gang leaders with your presumptiveness. Before anything can happen, though, you are taken away for questioning. Electrotherapy is more fun when it's combined with water torture!

Mind Control in my favor on all NPC's.

(4) You mind control George Bush and the entirety of Congress.

FLEE TO ITALY, SUMMON SCYTHER SWARM, REFOUND ROMAN EMPIRE

(5) You flee to your secret base in the Alps, from whence you send out a psychic rallying cry.

Far away in Canada, your call is answered.

The Radioactive Mutant Caribou Grim Reapers are coming. Be afraid.

Engage Zanzetkuken in rap battle.

(6) You challenge Zanzetkuken to a Celestial Rock-off. Both of you are transported to the Astral Plane and given +5 Electric Guitars of Riffing and +2 Pants of Grooving. Let the ultimate battle begin.

[Elephant Parade]

Climb out of hell.

[Remuthra]

Climb out of hell.

You're not in Hell.

As a side note, I'm using real dice now!

[Xantalos]

Play every rock song ever made at once.

[Elephant Parade]

Climb out of hell.

You're not in Hell.

As a side note, I'm using real dice now!

Climb out of not-Hell.

[Remuthra]

Play every rock song ever made at once.

(15+5) Cthulu is impressed, and wishes to make you a recording deal. Your Reputation increases!

BATTLEOFFREPUTATIONOMETER:

<============================================================================================================================================>

Climb out of hell.

You're not in Hell.

As a side note, I'm using real dice now!

Climb out of not-Hell.

You hit your head on a low-hanging street sign and are knocked unconscious. ((You can't succeed at anything until you get rid of the Dice Curse.))

[Xantalos]

Make dat recording deal!

[Elephant Parade]

Play every rock song ever made at once.

(15+5) Cthulu is impressed, and wishes to make you a recording deal. Your Reputation increases!

BATTLEOFFREPUTATIONOMETER:

<==============================================================================================================================================================>

Climb out of hell.

You're not in Hell.

As a side note, I'm using real dice now!

Climb out of not-Hell.

You hit your head on a low-hanging street sign and are knocked unconscious. ((You can't succeed at anything until you get rid of the Dice Curse.))

Fail to remove curse.

[TCM]

Use electroshock to gain electrical superpowers. Subsequently take over Guantanamo.

[GreatWyrmGold]

Pull Excalibur out of the White House, thus crowning me as King President of the United States.

(4) You take a walk towards the White House, and the lady of the reflecting pool tosses you the legendary Sword Bureaucracy, cutter of red tape, wielder of the governmental contract, which George Washington was said to wield. And yes, it is a lightsaber.

*high-fives Remuthra for knowledge of Arthurian lore*

Be a Senator.

(4) You become a third-party senator.

We're not taking this game very seriously, are we?

Time to slash Nazi communist terrorist Vietcong, for America!

Type extensive report explaining all the problems with this. Also:

(2) The FBI arrest you for two counts of free speech and one count of telling it like it is. You are taken to Guantanamo Bay for questioning about your terrorist nature.

...Um.

(5) You flee to your secret base in the Alps, from whence you send out a psychic rallying cry.
Far away in Canada, your call is answered.
The Radioactive Mutant Caribou Grim Reapers are coming. Be afraid.

Why? I'm nowhere near Europe, they'll probably drown on the way, and if not they'll have to get through the Swiss military first.

Use electroshock to gain electrical superpowers. Subsequently take over Guantanamo.

...Why not.
Aid action. Also gain superpowers.
Prepare my court case which points out all the things wrong with the case. Contemplate just bouncing the exact same charges back at the FBI. Like, the whole FBI.

[Dorsidwarf]

Become the KING OF THE BRITISH EMPIRE.

    annex LICHENSTEIN

[Remuthra]

Pull Excalibur out of the White House, thus crowning me as King President of the United States.

(4) You take a walk towards the White House, and the lady of the reflecting pool tosses you the legendary Sword Bureaucracy, cutter of red tape, wielder of the governmental contract, which George Washington was said to wield. And yes, it is a lightsaber.

*high-fives Remuthra for knowledge of Arthurian lore*

Be a Senator.

(4) You become a third-party senator.

We're not taking this game very seriously, are we?

Have you seen the original reason for creating this game? It was never meant to be more than a distraction.

Time to slash Nazi communist terrorist Vietcong, for America!

Type extensive report explaining all the problems with this. Also:

(2) The FBI arrest you for two counts of free speech and one count of telling it like it is. You are taken to Guantanamo Bay for questioning about your terrorist nature.

...Um.

You expected the continued protection of your First Amendment rights after 9/11? What gave you that idea?

(5) You flee to your secret base in the Alps, from whence you send out a psychic rallying cry.
Far away in Canada, your call is answered.
The Radioactive Mutant Caribou Grim Reapers are coming. Be afraid.

Why? I'm nowhere near Europe, they'll probably drown on the way, and if not they'll have to get through the Swiss military first.

...That action has nothing to do with you.

[GreatWyrmGold]

(5) You flee to your secret base in the Alps, from whence you send out a psychic rallying cry.
Far away in Canada, your call is answered.
The Radioactive Mutant Caribou Grim Reapers are coming. Be afraid.

Why? I'm nowhere near Europe, they'll probably drown on the way, and if not they'll have to get through the Swiss military first.

...That action has nothing to do with you.

So? Why should anyone be afraid? Pretty much everyone except that one guy is in the New World. And they still have to cross an ocean, a mountain range, and the Swiss before getting there.

[Remuthra]

(5) You flee to your secret base in the Alps, from whence you send out a psychic rallying cry.
Far away in Canada, your call is answered.
The Radioactive Mutant Caribou Grim Reapers are coming. Be afraid.

Why? I'm nowhere near Europe, they'll probably drown on the way, and if not they'll have to get through the Swiss military first.

...That action has nothing to do with you.

So? Why should anyone be afraid? Pretty much everyone except that one guy is in the New World. And they still have to cross an ocean, a mountain range, and the Swiss before getting there.

Yes. And Canada is directly north of you. Not across an ocean, a series of mountains, and the Swiss.

[GreatWyrmGold]

Um...the Alps are in Europe.