Resources Acquired: 4 Guardogs.You decide to build 4 more Guardogs, because you never know.
Harshly, you grab Psysquid -a squirming Psysquid- by the ear and pull him out of the same room your daughter is in. Afterwards, you look at him.
"I...Go change! Get something else! I don't care if it infringes Cthulhu copyright or what, but change into something proper! You look like a moronic perverted flasher and if I ever see you wearing something like this near Cerulean again, I will personally castrate you and make sure you never get to--"
Halfwards through your string of insults, you realize Psysquid is squirming on the ground in ecstasy.
You then bring a hand to your face.
"You dressed like this on purpose, didn't you?"
"MORE. Your evilness Overlordness, please more!"
"Go. Change."
"Immediately."
With that, he disappears as fast as light, before reappearing few minutes later -he already had a change prepared, the diabolical squid!
Dark green and black robes, with the neck surrounded by a Victorian-like 'gorge' and with frilly sleeves to let his tentacles out if he so wishes.
The symbol of your Evilness is stamped on the robe's chest, and beneath it is a minor symbol of a tentacle around a brain.
Apparently, your Dark Advisors have heraldry down to pat.
"That's...fine, I suppose," you murmur, before gazing at him seriously.
"You know, I never asked you..." you begin. "What of your past?"
"My...past?"
"Yes," you nod. "What of your past?"
"My...past," Psysquid blinks, before bringing his right hand to his chin. "I...admit I try hard not to remember it," he speaks slowly, for once completely serious with his voice soft. "I mean, it's not like anyone's going to care now that I'm a monster...I had an average job and a normal family...I was a security guard, my name was Bob Smith -Yes, I know it's the most common American Surname, but we're in Hero World, so it's not the same- and no, I wasn't...so 'turned on' by insults back then," he shakes his head.
"I had the usual run-of-the-mill overweight wife, you know the type that always has some type of mask on the face or some sort of strange thing in her hair? Yeah, well...it was normal, my son is off to university...it was a boring life, a normal life," he shrugged. "I'm glad it changed, otherwise...Well, you know how depression hits? Well, it hits hard you know? Knowing that in twenty years you'll be doing the same repetitive things you did twenty years before...it's maddening, I tell you...Maddening."
Then he chuckles, "But that's enough of Bob the Security Guard. I am Psysquid, the Dark Advisor of Incognito now. I left my past behind...and I don't regret it even for a single moment. Every day is so much fun now!"
You gently pat him on the shoulder, and that's when you realize his eyes are humid. "It's just..." he cracks, "sometimes I wonder how my son's doing, or if he found a sweetheart or something...but then I remember, they teach it in every school after all...monsters don't have families. They're created by evil overlords to bring forth death and despair...so really..." he wipes away his tears. "sorry your evilness, it won't happen again."
Then he politely excuses himself.
You grimace, and then you head over to the Sad System.
You grab a pickaxe. Then some bars of precious metal.
You start to feel slightly cold as you add in gems, magical and not together with luxury items.
Your skin itches, as a few socks and the corpse of a rich guy -now nothing more than a rotting mass- enter the altar.
You're really starting to believe this is a bad idea.
You then grab the cat, the animals from the zoo that still remain...
The shadows around the altar start to grow even darker, if that is possible.
Then you pour a generous dose of booze, some metal spikes and some hair from your stubble.
You don't know why you write a 'Store Item in Stockpile' note, or why you then place it in the mixture...
What you know, is that then you pray to whatever dark god there is that you will not fail to control the results.
And then, you begin the summoning.
I call you forth...from the deepest depths of nothingness and evil, from the darkest places ever to be generated. COME! I SUMMON THEE!
You are...The ground trembles, as fire and magma erupts from the altar, burning and sizzling the contents until a charred obsidian lump remains...which soon starts to crack and give way.
Your voice trembles as you bring up your unholy rosario.
it's...it's...Then the obsidian cast breaks apart.
1d12= 8 + 1(Unholy Rosario) + 1 (It's habit) + 1 (Sad System)= 11
The thing that emerges...is a strange brown mass of pulsing flesh and fur.
It quivers, before spikes emerge from its entire body hidden by the fur.
You have no idea what the thing is...
It slowly looks around for a moment, before gripping at the dirty room and suddenly moving to tidy it up quickly.
What the hell is it?
"Ehm...what are you?"
The Dark Minion stops and looks at you for a moment, cocking its head to the side.
Its spikes retract.
"
IT."
You summoned an IT!You don't need many objects to summon something. It actually has the opposite effect. Fewer but more specific you use, the better.
As a Hint, 'if a normal person saw all those things on a table, what would he think of' is the correct thought-process.
We all know of dwarf fortress. Average guy doesn't. You want a dorf...what would an average guy associate with a dorf?
You then head over to Chemista, who gives you one appraising gaze before smiling. "Oh, you mean the bioweaponry? Of course," she's actually smiling as she says that. "It's a virulent biologically engineered virus," she shrugs, "But here's the catch..." she smiles, "It only works on monsters."
"So...someone wanted to empower the heroes association with it?"
"Maybe," she replies, "Or maybe they wanted the monstrous heroes to die...you know, 'Heroes should only be human' purists and whatnot."
"Is it in a safe place now?"
"Of course," Chemista rolls her eyes. "It's hidden beneath the DANCE DANCE Ultimate of Gamington. You know, the one filled with holes from his..."
She snorts. "I'm joking." Then she smiles. "I hid it beyond the second star in the nightsky, reachable only with the use of a flying fairy..."
You give her a glare.
"Fine, fine!" she huffs. "I'm re-purposing it to kill only humans. When that will be done, we'll have the ability to wipe out of the trace of the world an entire city..." she snickers. "It will be glorious."
Then she cocks her head to the side. "Of course, I will await your orders before deploying it...but we will have that ability...
soon."
You head towards Lord Gamington, who unfortunately isn't dancing...but sighing while looking forlorn.
"What's the problem?" you ask him, only to see him stand upright and to attention.
"Your evilness!" he remarks. "IT's...well, I think it's the last mission. The animals are good and all for destruction but...they don't know the meaning of the word mercy. I'm not making it a fault of theirs, but...I don't like it."
"You want to stop having animals as your underlings?"
"I'd rather have Cogs, your evilness. I feel an affinity with them," he smiles, "Maybe even a flesh-cog or two? We never got around to building more...well, there's Coghuahua of course but..."
"I'll see what I can do."
"There's no need to worry though, your evilness! I am your must trustworthy partner in dance-dance-evil after all! Should you jump and leap in the air like a dashing swan, I will do my utmost to catch you!"
"That sounded..."
"Adorable, I know!" he smiles brightly then. "Coghuahua says I'm so kind-hearted it will cloy her cogs one day."
He giggles. "I think she likes me," he whispers like a two years old. "You think she likes me?"
You roll your eyes.
You could actually program her to like him.
"Why don't you ask her?" you remark, before patting him on the back. "Go and fight on, Gamington!"
"Yes sir!"
You walk into your daughter's room, only to find her staring at a picture of her team. Her old team.
She exhales, her jelly fingers touching gently the glass that separates the photo from her fingers. She smiles bitterly, and then starts to whisper.
"Die."
You still before announcing your presence.
"Die." she whispers again.
"Die. Die.
Die. Die. DIE. DIE. DIE. DIE. You have to DIE. DIE. DIE!" she throws the picture against the wall, taking a deep shuddering breath.
"Die. And stay dead," she croaks out, sniffling.
You take a few steps back, and then 'stomp down' hard as you walk in next. She smiles at you as if nothing is wrong, the picture of her old team still on the floor.
"Hey dad!" she smiles, slinking close to hug you. "How're you doing?"
"Fine," you reply, "What about you?"
"Oh, I'm good!" she smiles. "Was just thinking...you know, about my old team..." she hums, "Could we meet them again one day?"
"Why do you ask?"
"Because they'll become Heroic heroes, right? And when they do, we'll have to kill them, right?" she blinks. "So...when we have to kill them, I want to be there."
"Cerulean..."
"Please daddy? Pretty please?"
"I'll think about it."
"You're the best!" and with that, she hugs you again.
"I have to ask...aren't you worried about Psysquid?"
"Why? He's the best uncle ever! He even plays hide and seek with me when I ask! HE always finds me though..." she pouts. "I think he's cheating somehow."
"What of Chemista?"
"Mom? What about her?"
"Her vocabulary is...quite colorful."
"She speaks in colors?"
"No, I mean...the bad words..."
"Ah, the insults...I grew up with worse!" she smiles brightly. "Training to become a magical heroine isn't easy dad, the instructor called us all bad names and starved us sometimes too!" she looked to the side. "You're not going to starve me, are you?"
You shake your head. You actually never asked about her own past now that you think about it.
"What...was it like?"
"What?"
"Growing in the orphanage, as a magical girl..."
"Oh it was kind of funny!" she giggled, "We started in twenty-five, we all had to show how cute we were and do little tricks like playing cutely or moving around in frilly dresses. If you weren't cute enough you dropped out of the selections and went back to the orphanage, or became a side-kick. Those who passed -and I was among them- became the magical girl team...training was hard. We had to always be cute, nice, with a smile on our face..." she smiles brightly, "One day, they had us keep this face for the entire training time. If you didn't smile, they broke your teeth and sent you back."
She giggled. "It was agonizing," she shook her head, "But you know...it was better than the orphanage."
She shudders. "At least the rooms were warm and fluffy, and you had toys in there!"
She looks at you, "Dad? Why are you shaking?"
"Nothing," you reply with a strained smile. "Just thinking..." about who to murder.
After a moment of silence, Cerulean breaks it by asking a question.
"Can I have my magical staff now?" she pouts.
"Not yet," you reply, moving to leave slowly, after returning her hug.
She pouts, but then waves you goodbye. You see as you're leaving, with the corner of your eyes, her form move to the old picture of her team...and then slowly start to digest it in the acids of her stomach.
Sending a message to Cheerie might be problematic. You don't know where her lair is or how to contact her...but maybe she follows the news. You could always make a public announcement too...
You are still in Upkeep.
Do something else, or move to Mission Selection?