Power in his hands, thylacines on his mind, dura mater crackling with the bubbling potential for destruction that he intends to unleash,
Dave, lacking any unused brain power with which he could create a clever one liner before he massively relieves his tension over all of these underwear creatures, merely shouts out something he's always wanted to say to someone before their head exploded from his sheer visage.
"BEHOLD MY POWER, FOR I AM DAVE!" he screams, arms turned skyward, palms bent forward, hips cocked at a fashionable angle, and with a single forward bop of his head, unleashes hell!
[Dave's affinity roll: 6-->3-1+
3]
The ground shakes and groans, and from underneath Dave's feet a crack begins to form. The black, moldy earth rises upward, elevating Dave higher and higher, and the crack grows deeper, wider, spreading out over the battlefield in a spiraling shape, the assembled underwear warriors looking at each other, wondering whether they should do something. A rumbling that only a legion of subterranean marsupials of mysterious origin at his beck and call could produce.
With a mighty roar, he lets the thylacines flow! The ground is torn open along a spiral, underwear warriors and their mounts alike separated from each other by the coils of the magical river that winds round and round again. Confusion overtakes the battlefield as the maneuver comes completely out of left field, magic both unknown and untested among the ranks of the warriors!
And then, to top it off, their mounts start actively rebelling in the moment of confusion, impaling their riders on suddenly-grown blades, then throwing them into the river still spreading around and even branching into yet more smaller spirals, before commencing the immediate and violent stabbing of the footsoldiers present - this, naturally, is not good for morale, or numbers, or any other worthwhile positive thing that a side can have on the battlefield during wartime. Dave notices the underwear master in the distance, shouting orders while wounded, and wonders if he really needs to do more, or if he's already done all he needs - after all, it's an impressive job he's performed here - the river's still going around, in fact, only stopping at the wall of the fortress itself. And the thylacines are looking positively ferocious this time, too.
* * * * *
Ever a crowd pleaser,
Larry gives the Oldthinker a taste of some good magic - the best there is, in fact - the magic of hats.
"You want to see some magic? Sure!"[Larry's affinity roll: 4+1]
And with the snap of the fingers, a pile of hats suddenly manifests before the Oldthinker, who seems impressed.
"Awethome thtuff," he says, taking a rather pristine tan campaign hat like you'd see on a stereotypical park ranger from out of the pile, putting it on. Larry has to say, he wears it well.
"You could make thome good money off thith kind of thing."* * * * *
THE DUNKER, though injured, knows the cure to all his ails - magic!
"Urgh. Well, I noticed that that leyline thing heals wounds. I suppose I'll go up there again, just not so far," he explains as he tries and, with the help of his new friends, succeeds at getting up.
"Sound plan," Joanie observes while the ginger guy smirks. The three of them then move to the nearest staircase, helping the fat man up the fiendish adversary that several flights of stairs represent. It is indeed a painful journey, he finds.
"So, who're you then, redhaired guy?" he asks as they ascend the second floor.
"Me? I'm Nigel," the fellow says, his own name passing his lips with slight distaste.
"I'm technically still the night watchman for this school, though I'm guessing not for much longer.""I wonder why. You did such a stellar fucking job at, Nige," Joanie observes bitterly.
"Yeah, yeah. We'll see how you do when somebody drops two goddamn asteroid of yetis and meth-heads on your turf.""You left out the part where a sixteen-year-old beat the living crap out of you and stole all your stuff after getting the drop on you in an empty hallway.""Hey, he had another guy with him. Big one, he was.""I bet he was. Bigger than you, anyway, not that that's some achievement for someone over 14."Nigel just grumbles as they reach the rooftop, and THE DUNKER stands tall to face the leyline, and waits. In a moment it occurs to him that, while he could heal at the regular human rate just standing near a leyline, he can just as well just harness it the proper way, like Joanie seemed to back then. And it does seem to work much better that way, THE DUNKER feeling good as new within mere moments!
* * * * *
John, guessing that even a man like James needs his beauty sleep, looks out for danger all about him - fortunately, there is none that he can see, aside from the weird mass down the hall, which seems to have somehow mended itself in the time period while John was asleep.
Needless to say, some 20 minutes pass much like a venerable grandmother, and John then tries to wake up his companion, who budges pretty easily.
"Uh? Mary?" he mutters as he slowly wakes, but seems a little disappointed to only see John.
"Oh. John. So, it's time?"John assures the man that yes, it's time, and the two of them sleepily pick up the bench and commence the plan they had beforehand - ram the mass until it gives way. And with a single mighty charge, the two men manage to rip right through the mass without any sort of problem, not even getting a significant amount of any ichor on themselves, not that that there is much to begin with.
On the other side of the mass there seems to be an administrative wing, filled with non-doctor offices - there's an on-site lawyer's place, the office of some other administrative staff, and even the Chief of Medicine's office. Quite a lot of places to explore here. And with this bench in his and James' hands, John is fairly sure he can't be stopped.
* * * * *
Eta, hoping that her absolutely terrible ability at physical activity, honed through years of having a naturally decent metabolism and no real need to perform any feats of athletics, tries to get her second wind along with Lois.
"Maybe if we, like, make it a race or something?" Lois suggests, but this is promptly ignored in favor of serious matters. Gritting her teeth, Eta tries to force herself upwards.
[Eta's body roll: 1-->4-1]
In fact, her attempt is so forceful that she manages to yank out one of her handholds, which causes a cascade of events ending with her losing her balance and falling a whole meter, then landing on her tailbone, which hurts like an absolute bitch, to put it mildly, though nothing feels particularly broken.
[Lois' body roll: 1-->1]
"Uh, you okay?" Lois asks absently, not even looking at the pillar while ascending further - a poor decision that causes her to miss a particular spot with her foot, then lose her balance, followed by a wholesale fall, filled with utter panic as she tries to grab for the pillar vainly.
Words can hardly describe the trajectory of her fall, so awkward is it - a flailing attempt at a rapid backflip of sorts that ends up with her making the second worst landing she could have possibly made, her body basically flopping on the ground while twisted in an unfortunate way that causes her head to be slammed like a hammer into the hard ground in what looks like an extremely painful way - for a sudden fearful moment, Eta hopes that was not a crack she heard just then, and quickly moves to look at her friend.
Lois, fortunately, isn't dead from the looks of it, but she is definitely out cold.
* * * * *
Thanking his Lord for the wonderful help,
Halesey vacates Potato Heaven post-haste, arriving back in the sinful mortal world, knowing that it is indeed time for him to arrange a new sort of date. He dials Linda's number, which he somehow feels he knows after speaking with God, and waits for an answer. It comes soon enough.
"Um, yes? Hello?" the voice of Linda comes in at the other end, a little sad.
"It's me!""You! Why, I...!""Yes! Me! I called you to tell you that I, from the bottom of my heart and soul, am sorry, for I have been most ungentlemanly to you this evening!""You what?""I have done you wrong, my dear, but rest assured that I will make amends! Tomorrow we shall meet!""Why would I-""At the Green Diamond! In the evening! About 7 P.M., for that is a lucky number! That gives you exactly nineteen hours to make your decision, but rest assured that I will be waiting there, hoping that you can give me but one more chance to prove myself worthy of you! For now, farewell - whether you choose to come or not, know that I shall be thinking of you!" Halesey says, and then, on a roll, hangs up. If it's meant to be, it will happen - this he knows. Now he only has to avoid time-consuming misadventure on the latter half of tomorrow, make it there on time and not make a complete ass of himself in front of the love of his life. Shouldn't be too difficult, should it?
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Topic: The Forgotten Art: Approaching the Nexus (Read 271178 times)