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[xana55]

Take a moment to think back on all your past fortresses and the dwarves you've lead to destruction or victory. Think on it for a few moments then pick from all your history the most brutal act of violence, the most violent injury or death, and the most disgusting thing that you've ever had happen in any fortress. Perhaps Armok shall be pleased with your offering of stories or enraged by there inadequacy, give it a go and see what happens.

...

In other words I'm a little board tonight and had an idea to collect yet more stories of wacky violence.

[InfinityOrNone]

Nope. My fortress was tantrum-spiraling and my thresher (read: hauler) was about three squares away from where the migrant popped up when he went insane. The migrant wave actually stopped after the guy got wacked. I can see it now...

Urist McMigrantOne: So, this is Goldenage, eh? Looks like things are coming along smoothly enough.
Urist McMigrantTwo: Good thing, the wife and 12 nobles are starting to get antsy. Hey, who's that?
Urist McMigrantOne: Greeting, good sir! We have come to join your wondrous fortre-
Urist McThresher: RAAAAHGAA! *Punches Urist McMigrantOne's brains out*
Urist McMigrantTwo: I WANT TO LIVE! *flees*

[itg]

During a zombie siege some dwarf years ago, I had a newish recruit run off to tackle a about a dozen zombies on her own. Needless to say, it didn't go well for her, and she quickly got a few limbs broken and passed out. The zombies proceeded to literally bash her face in for days before I could get the rest of her squad to stop chasing this one random zombie and rescue their fallen comrade. She lived, thanks to her =adamantine helm=, but helms don't protect the face area. Let's just say she won't be winning any beauty contests...

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

[Spacespinner]

I have a vampire with a masterwork wooden spear and another vampire with an artifact bone sword that I've locked outside of the fortress. Everyone inside lives in peace while these two super soldiers (every attribute and skill maxed) slowly kill invaders by themselves which takes a LONG time and a very messy combat log due to inferior weapon materials, but they never get fatigued due to being vampires so they fight forever. It's hilarious and I really want to get a named wooden spear with a few thousand kills.

[Spacespinner]

Another gold one was a tantrum spiral from .31 iirc where a pet giant bat wrestled a battle axe off someone and proceeded to kill a few dozen people with it. It actually was using the weapons for the kills and got titles.

[Angel Of Death]

I once had a fortress where anyone who was incapable of working or had sub-par stats was impaled and had their corpse hauled off into a mass grave. It worked out rather well at the beginning, but then the mass grave became full, and the pissed off ghosts ended up making things very complicated.

[KingBacon]

A few months back, (back when I still used danger rooms), I had my first encounter with an unfortunate syndrome from a FB. It had deadly blood see, and my military dorfs had been quite hacky slashy all over the cavern gate. About 10 minutes after the battle all of my military dorfs (and war dogs) began to suddenly hemorrhage explosively. One moment they are walking, no sign of distress or injury, then BOOM BLOOD EVERYWHERE.
I told my mom about it and she laughed.

 

[enolate]

Not particularly disgusting, but quite brutal and hilarious. I had a very well trained hammerdwarf face off against an undead giant spider. The spider ripped his arm clean off, though he did manage to kill it. He was too wounded to do anything and not wounded enough to be willing to go to the hospital. So he just stood there till he got absolutely miserable. Then he began to tantrum. But picking a fist-fight is no fun in the middle of nowhere. No. So he marched back to the fort to pick a fight with another military dwarf, still trailing blood from his arm. But that seemed to snap them both back into sanity, and the fist-fight sadly turned into sparring. He never did go to the hospital, just led his squad to victory holding a silver hammer and shield in one hand and bleeding out the other. Didn't seem to matter.

Did I mention that his dislike was cave spiders? Not sure I blamed him.

[Button]

Disgusting, eh?

In 0.31, I had a FB with a slow necrosis breath. Slow-acting enough that the dwarves stayed alive for months while the surgeons worked on them. The hospital was invisible under a thick cloud of miasma. I don't think even the most skilled surgeon could have saved any of them - it was rot of the whole body, including the brain. Maybe if they had started with the vital organs, but for some reason they always seemed to start with the eyelids...

Anyway, nearly a full squad of soldiers laid up in the hospital, slowly rotting alive while the rest of the fortress kept coming in to bring them food and drink and medical care. Eventually one of the haulers snapped and started a fight with one of the surgeons.

After that fort I started making individual rooms in the hospital, both for patient management/triage, and for not letting the miasma get everywhere.

[Ora_the_Owlish]

My first-ever Unwelcome Visitor was a web-shooting, flying Savannah Titan. For some reason, I figured it'd make an easy catch--just send my military in to clobber it to unconsciousness on top of a cage trap, and then free silk forever! Here's how the plan worked:

1. Savannah Titan passes airlock and reaches the Depot. All is going according to plan.

2. Savannah Titan suddenly stops moving right in front of the Hall o' Traps. What gives?

3. Idiot McOverseer decides some luring is in order, sends out a squad. A melee squad.

4. Webbing everywhere. Marble depot repainted red.

5. Civilian dwarves hear the call of the socks. Savannah Titan rushes into the trap corridor. The two sides meet over the weapon traps. The Savannah Titan webs some dozen+ dwarves, costing them their TRAPAVOID.

THE SEVERED PART FLIES OFF IN AN ARC

(Of course, this caused a tantrum spiral as my furious mob of dwarven children started biting off fingers or whatever. The Titan didn't even bother going deeper into the fortress.)

[evictedSaint]

I used to have a penchant for mutilating prisoners of war, then releasing them.

Always just one, though.

I can't count how many times I've sent back only one lone goblin from a siege force of 50+, missing his legs and arms.

[escondida]

My last fort had an FB, a huge, noseless goat. It belched and croaked, and had deadly (and semi-solid) spittle. Thankfully, it only got one kill, a miner who distracted it while everyone else ran inside. It toyed with him for days, tiring him out by spitting gobbets of horrible gunk at him (which he would bat away with his pick). Finally, it cornered him, systematically broke every bone in his body, and then stood over him...and spat. Thankfully, I never found out what the effects were, since the force was enough to cave in his skull, but what a way to go. Looking up at a scabrous, deformed goat as it belched up who knows what, and having no way to escape because of the extreme pain from all the broken bones, and then the last image before death is a monstrous glob of phlegm.

[Sabretache]

A curious chain of events where a miner is thrown into the air by a bridge and looses grip of his pickaxe. The pickaxe flies through the air and severs some poor dwarfs arm. That dwarf then stands there for a while before falling into the moat.

[deepdowner]

I only just started playing and I don't progress before I have the fort in a state I want, so I only just breached the caverns, but sealed them off until I have at least SOME sort of military (and docs as well I think).

So yesterday I had a goblin thief discovered who made a run for it, but only until he got near Urist McHunter, who took one shot at him and hit him in the chest which propelled him backwards and into the mountain wall, so he lost his consciousness. So my Hunter takes a few more shots in, each followed by the goblin giving into pain and fainting again, only to wake up for the next shot. It seems Urist aims for another body part each turn, while the goblin tries to crab away whenever he gets up again, pouring blood all over pasture area.

I stopped constructing my military training room to watch, until suddenly Urist loses all interest and hauls his previous prey inside, leaving the fainted goblin in his trace of blood.

Disappointed I watch the goblin thief get up again to slowly crab away, with every bodypart torn and red, blood everywhere until he reaches the edge of the map.

I'm not sure if that means Urist McArcher for his deeds, or no promotion into the military because he let the goblin live. 

[WanderingKid]

He never did go to the hospital, just led his squad to victory holding a silver hammer and shield in one hand and bleeding out the other. Didn't seem to matter.

This made me laugh far harder than it probably should have.

Worst I've had was some poor goblin from an ambush who met one of my carpenters out in the wild collecting wood.  The carpenter proceeded to break both its arms before smashing every tooth out of the goblin's mouth with his bare hands.  At some point the ambush had broken and this poor sap started trying to run, so the carpenter proceeded to break his legs.  He then bit him to death, mostly through the stomach.  Same carpenter in an earlier ambush one punched a goblin snatcher that popped up.  That made me laugh, too.  "'eh?  A goblin?"  WHUMP.  *wipes brain splatter from knuckles off on handkerchief* "Stupid pests.  Now, let's get that lumber."

So far I haven't really ended up with one of those awesome stories that some folks seem to get, unless you count stupidity like letting a firebreathing FB in because you didn't realize you breached a cavern and it gets into the hospital... then the legendary dining room where ALL the booze is stored...