Ursus wakes up on the morning of the second day hungover, red eyed and murderous with rage.
Lap realises that, actually, he was the child of Bret Hart, after all. He sets out to find his natural father.
Lap Umomen decide to use his name as an excuse to get into lap-dancing in the nearest tavern.
Maim the other team's squire. Using an AP, convince the nobles that the other team started it. Completely ignore Sir Sam's armour.
((Convincing will have to wait for the Joust period))
Defend my squire. Use Ursus's skin as a cape.
I leap to the defense of my ursine squire, focusing solely on defense with my shield ...
If I see any hooligans brawling in the stables or whatever quarters we knights share, attempt to arrest the aggressors! We aren't savages, and we knights need to stick together if we want to be civil! The thievery of last night did not go unnoticed! (there must be deplorable rapscallions about for them to have absconded with our picnic basket!) Also, send for help in such a case!
Rolling to choose one Lap suggestion,
odd is the first suggestion and
even is the second suggestion.
2 … Lap attempts to start a career as a lap-dancer at the Nantes tavern.On the morning of the second day, young Lap decides to make some money for his team and wanders the streets of Nantes looking for opportunities. He finds a sign outside the tavern that reads, “Looking for lap
dancers, apply inside.” He wanders inside and talks to the barman, who looks at him with curiosity and wonder.
“Hmmm. Our customers don't usually go in for your type. But maybe. Who knows, right? But first, you need to work the pole. If you got what it takes, you can move to the back lounge.”
Lap is shown a polished floor to ceiling wooden pole and told to practice before the evening. He climbs to the top of the pole and slides back down several times because, well, nobody told him what to really do. Knight Hemingsworth of House Tinklebottom walks in for a morning tipple, and sits to admire the youth's monkeyness.
Lap rolling against Eloquence (5) … 4 … Success!He calls from the top of the pole, “Hey, Monsieur, how am I doing? Can I get an advance on tonight's work?” The barman looks up at young Lap dangling from the rafters and is severely impressed with how high the young Squire has climbed, and tosses up a small bag of shillings. “Do that tonight and ye shall be rewarded!”
Team Uhh! Gains 10 shillings.Ursus walks into the bar. The barman immediately cowers behind his counter and calls out, “We... err.. w..ww..we got no picanic baskets here, Monsieur. P... p … please leave us!” Ursus ignores the French dolt of a bartender and focuses on Squire Lap, up a wooden pole that looks, from Ursus' position, remarkably like a tree. He knows what to do. But before he can reach the base of the dancing pole, Antoine charges into the tavern and blocks the beast in the name of decency. He threatens Ursus with all kinds of animal cruelty, especially making use of his pelt, and stands his ground. Ursus is enraged, and stands on his hind legs and roars savagely.
In barges Knight Samuel “Stone Cold” Stone, hearing his squire's call, hands on hips, brandishing a shield and talking trash straight off the bat. ”Whose da fool dat wants to mess with my Squire?! You be enterin' a world of pain!” And makes to whale on Antoine in defense of Ursus' honour, a poor bear away from his home and family who, it has to be said, has been caught doing absolutely nothing by other contestants up to this point.
Royal Rumble in Nantes Tavern!A four man fight, two on two. Knights are rolling Shieldery, Squires Brawling. Let the games commence!
Antoine rolling against Shieldery (5) … 9 … Failure!
Lap rolling against Brawling (3) … 10 … Failure!((Ouch... not looking good...))
Stone rolling against Shieldery (9) … 6 … Success!
Ursus rolling against Brawling (9) … 3 … Success!((If only those rolls had been the other way around))
Team Braggadocio certainly talks big and this morning they delivered on those promises, threats and general comments asserting self-superiority by giving a good thrashing to Antoine and Lap. The knight suffers from a mild concussion from being whacked over the head by Stone in a highly illegal but crowd pleasing chair smashing move. The squire suffers from leg bites that really really hurt, and Ursus ate his right shoe.
Antoine Lancery -1
Lap Charm -1Hemingsworth is shocked at the outcome, as honour and decency has lost out to brash knavery. He stands up and shouts, “We aren't savages, and we knights need to stick together if we want to be civil! The thievery of last night did not go unnoticed!” And then in a slightly less manly, though still noble, fashion, “And, err, can anyone help me incapacitate and arrest this hooligan knight and squire tagteam?” He looks around but the tavern is empty at this hour. He suspects that even were it at peak time in the evening, the presence of a barely non-wild grizzly bear would have emptied the tables anyway. He goes it alone...
Hemingsworth rolling against Shieldery (6) ... 4 ... Success!
Stone rolling against Shieldery (1) ... Critical Success!
Hemingsworth makes a decent swipe at Stone with his poxy buckler, but the farmboy-wrestler turned knight pulls off a stunning reverse chokeslam facebuster with a little support from Ursus, to instant applause from the barman.
Stone rolling to-hit ... 4 ... Right arm!
Stone rolling to-damage ... 4 ... Non-trivial!Though it was really only for show, the move goes wrong and Hemingsworth twists his arm out of place, tearing his elbow ligament. He cannot really move or do anything with his right arm without serious amounts of pain and cursing.
Hemingsworth Lancery - 3And so Stone and Ursus leave the wrecked tavern together, tables broken, chairs splintered and knights and squires laying in waste. It was a good morning's work.
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Topic: Medieval Jousting Heroes - Stage 1 - Nantes - Day 1 (Read 27935 times)