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[Xantalos]

You are not helping your case.

What case?

The case that you would be a non-terrible god.

I already swore that I would destroy or harm the world! All I'm here for us to watch X do stuff, and if I can free her up to do some unscrupulous things with my 'anything goes' morality, so much the better!

[IronyOwl]

I actually think my record speaks best for my becoming a god.

I'm not familiar with it.

...well I'm familiar with some records, but I assume they're not very representative if you're bragging about them. :I

I already swore that I would destroy or harm the world! All I'm here for us to watch X do stuff, and if I can free her up to do some unscrupulous things with my 'anything goes' morality, so much the better!

...

IronyOwl for Turn 3!

"We're not Xantalos!"

[Xantalos]

*grumblegrumble*
If a solemn oath meant solely to reassure you guys that I wasn't going to break the story isn't enough, which I had no intention of doing in the first place, isn't enough, what is?

[IronyOwl]

*grumblegrumble*
If a solemn oath meant solely to reassure you guys that I wasn't going to break the story isn't enough, which I had no intention of doing in the first place, isn't enough, what is?

Well, needing to take an oath like that in the first place puts you back a fair ways.

But otherwise, like I said: Something you'll do right, not just something you'll avoid doing wrong. I would consider corrupting a paladin via apathy to count as violating the latter, personally.

[Xantalos]

Well, paladins take on the moral code of their god, don't they? I'll just say that for this game my moral code is whatever the player decides, letting her actions be more diverse!
Also, I didn't need to take that oath, but I did because I didn't want this to happen:
*holds up badly put together sock puppet of GWG*
^{Xantalos is tricking us! He just wants to destroy the world again like he did in several minimalist RTDs! We shouldn't let him apply for godhood nyah nyah nyah!}

[Weirdsound]

Chill guys. None of you are becoming gods... on turn 3 anyway

Anyway, I might put up some specific mechanics for Chemistry. Should I? Or would you rather keep it a stat of mystery?

[Xantalos]

I was planning to apply when we meet a priest anyhow.
Stat of mystery for me!

[IronyOwl]

Mmmyyyyyysssssssssssteryyyyyyyyy

I mean, if you want to that's fine, but without knowing how it works I'd guess it's better as a mystery feature.

[GreatWyrmGold]

I already swore that I would destroy or harm the world!

Um...

All I'm here for us to watch X do stuff, and if I can free her up to do some unscrupulous things with my 'anything goes' morality, so much the better!

...

IronyOwl for Turn 3!

"We're not Xantalos!"

GreatWyrmGold for Turn 3!
Between my track record, my accountability, and the fact that I can come up with positive reasons, I am the Positive Candidate.
Be Positive.

Aw, no godhood? Oh well, at least we're not adding an omnicidal moron to the pantheon.

[Xantalos]

You're tempting me, GWG. You're tempting me.

[Weirdsound]

Prelude: Storming the Castle

Turn 3

Okay, the bad news is this game seems to have sucked me in a bit. I guess we shall start the next battle then. X, since you were a whiny little girl about it, why don't you show off your new pog and reveal where that treasure trove is at?

"Oh mighty Chindook, I your most humble... and now your most sexy... servant invoke your name! Reveal to me the secrets of this retched pit, so I may smite these wretched adorable elephant-dragon people, escape their den of nastiness, and save my governor from the wicked Demon Viceroy! I WANT SOME FREAKING TREASURE PLEASE!"

Divine geographical knowledge rushes into your head.... you now know exactly where a treasure trove is...



...and it is nowhere near you.

Anyway, time to start the battle. In this room are three cutebolds. They are spread out this time, so picking them apart one by one is an option. One of them is glowing green and particularly nasty looking. Albus again fails to find a bonus foe.

"Alright players, lets get me through this one alive. That glowing one dosn't look much tougher than the others, so I'm not worried. I mean it has decent looking gear, but I'm still a fully equipped Paladin. I'd check its entry under enemy stats below to be sure, BUT FOR SOME REASON I CAN'T READ ANYMORE!"

---

Party Stats:

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

Name: Quigleyurk-the-Jobfic, ov-Zantmydsawp 'X' *Current Main Character*
Race: Halfling
Level: 4
Survive 2 more combat encounters to level up!

HP: 14/14
Movement: 4 meters per round (Currently Using Albus' Movement)
Weapon On Hand: Dwarven Shortsword (+5 Attack Bonus, 1d10+3 Damage)
Armor: Halfling Sized Platmail With Shield (AC 16)

Other Items:
Steel Shortsword (+4 Attack Bonus, 1d8+1 Damage)
Dog Leash
6 days worth of halfling sized meals

Abilities:
Divine Dog-Rider: You and your gear are never burdensome to a properly saddled and friendly riding dog.
Chindook’s Dungeon Sense: Once per dungeon you may choose to reveal a Treasure Trove, a Recruitment Chance, or a Bonus Boss on the Dungeon Map.

Spells:
Lesser Healing (Melee Range or Self, Heals 3d6+2 HP, 2 uses per dungeon)
Holy Fireball (6m Range. Inflicts 2d6+1 Damage, 2 uses per dungeon)
Summon Lesser Holy Beast (1 use per dungeon)

Chemistry:
scapheap +2
GWG +2
IronyOwl +5

---


Name: Albus
Race: Canine
Level: 3
Survive 1 more combat encounters to level up!

HP: 12/12
Movement: 8 meters per round (Currently Ferrying 'X')
Weapon On Hand: Teeth (+3 Attack Bonus, 1d8+2 Damage)
Armor: Thick fur and swift reflexes (AC 14)

Other Items:
Dog Saddle
Dog Harness

Abilities:
Hunter: At the start of each encounter Albus has a 1/6 chance of finding a bonus foe. A bonus foe found this way is generally no more dangerous than the other foes in the fight, and drops cool swag when it dies.
Tracker: Albus has a 3/5 chance of being able to track any scent he picks up. The chance is lower if the thing you are tracking is taking active steps to avoid being tracked.

Spells:
None Yet

Chemistry:
None Yet

Battle Map:

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

1 Meter = The size of X's Token on the map

Enemy Stats:

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

Kobold Cutebold

A charming creature that loves nothing more than killing and eating halflings. It wields a fangs and a knife. It wears animal skins if anything at all. Please ignore my fingers on the pog, I photographed it myself.

Attack: +2 Base Attack Bonus, 1d6+1 Damage
Defense: AC 9, 7 Max HP
Opportunistic Attacker: When making an attack of opportunity, a Cutebold gains a +4 bonus to attack roll and damage

---

Kobold Nuclear-Cutebold

A charmingly radioactive creature that loves nothing more than killing and eating halflings... or mutating them. It wields fangs and a mace of uranium. It wears uranium chain-mail. It conveniently carries lead carrying cases for its gear, so that the party can safely loot its stuff.

Attack: +4 Base Attack Bonus, 1d10+1 Damage
Defense: AC 13, 9 Max HP
Opportunistic Attacker: When making an attack of opportunity, a Cutebold gains a +4 bonus to attack roll and damage
Hero-Deoptimizer: When a radioactive NPC scores a hit on a party member, that party member gains a minor but PERMANENT debuff

Dungeon Map:

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

Map Key:
The brown boxes are rooms...
A room containing a sword in a stone alter is a Treasure Trove...
The lines show which rooms connect to each other...
The main character represents the parties current location in the dungeon...
The exit sign is the dungeon exit you are trying to reach

[Xantalos]

FIREBALL THE GREEN ONE

[IronyOwl]

FIREBALL THE GREEN ONE

Yeah, I'll second this.

When it does get within range we should make sure both X and Albus attack it before it gets its turn.

[Xantalos]

Aye. Permanent debuffs = bad.

[Dariush]

Who wants to bet that we found the Big Bad of the whole story arc? I bet the everything of the next dead PC.