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[squidgen]

BEWARE: beyond these words lies a tale of stupidity and newbishness. You have been warned

So, a few days ago I discovered DF, watched a few tutorial videos, and decided to start a fortress. The beginning was fairly tame, with digging out a fortress, cutting down trees, discovering you could direct your military to kill random wildlife, etc. It all started to go downhill when 1. Some keas snuck into my fortress and 2. My butcher left on break and left a corpse to rot in the fortress. Dwarfs could not eat or drink because they hung around those stockpiles. eventually, a dog ripped it apart but not before the damage was done, and I experienced my first tantrum. Yay. Some idiot dwarf decided to walk into the sealed off butcher room and unleashed miasma and flies into the fortress, and I got to witness my second tantrum. Double yay.
I managed to recover, until I saw this message:
Random dwarf interrupted by donkey head hair/ ox left ear hair.
I don't know why dwarfs were terrified by random undead hairs, but they were. I then looked at the unit screen and saw several kea corpses moving around, as well as a mutilated raven corpse. After several HOURS of searching and attempting to kill undead hair, I found the necromancer who was apparently also a trader in one of my cadge traps. I sic'd my military on him and tried to restore order to the bedroom level, where a mutilated undead raven was giving people nightmares. What I didn't notice was that the military couldn't kill the necromancer through the cage, and several died of hunger/thirst. I then looked at the looming tantrum spiral, then at my shoddily designed fortress, and abandoned it.

You may now make fun of my newbishness.

[slothen]

that's awesome.  A typical tale of newb woe would have ended with dwarves dying of thirst and trantruming over Keas and Miasma, but you threw in the undead too.  Also soldiers expiring on a forsaken assignment to kill an immortal being held invulnerable inside the pocket universe that the game's simulation of cages.

[JimboM12]

Welcome to fucking Boatmurdered Dwarf Fortress! Hope you like miasma!

This kinda thing is expected of your first couple of forts, and good job on not giving up and actually building a fort (even if it failed). I welcome you to the forum and membership to one of the most depraved collection of magnificent bastards ever to play computer games.

You should take a look through the hall of legends and read some of the classic community games.

[Matoro]

Those bloody keas. I hate them too.

[Bobnova]

Man, this made my morning.
That's pretty classic

[Rogue Yun]

Some idiot dwarf decided to walk into the sealed off butcher room and unleashed miasma and flies into the fortress

Note to self: on my next fortress have more than one door on my butcher shop : )

[Kumis]

I just make sure pretty much everyone has butchering enabled, as well as having 2 or 3 butcher shops even for a small fort, to save hunters hauling a huge carcass in, and then deciding to haul it back out again.


I'm yet to work out how to stop necromancers from destroying all my fortresses, though. This fort I'm going to see if dumping bodies into a deep pit is viable.

[Bobnova]

Minecart quantum stockpile at the bottom of a deep shaft.

Or, my current setup, minecart quantum stockpile that I channeled to the surface above (to make it a "surface" tile that never generates miasma) and then roofed back over.
Actually I installed floor bars up on the surface for the RP factor (ventilation), not sure if necros can "see" through the floor bars to animate things, so far they've tried to walk in the front door instead.
Alternatively, I built a necromancer trap outdoors, don't know if it works on necros yet but it definitely works on dumbass herbalists.
There's a refuse pile with some misc. junk in it, a 1 tile wide walkway with empty space on one side and a wall on the other, with pressure plates linked to a heavily pressurized water supply above.
Step on the pressure plates, release water, wash necro (or herbalist) into the holding pen.
It's awfully sloppy, I'd do it differently if I did it a second time. I'd like a necro to show up and test it now.

[Hetairos]

Ah yes, cages. A possible pinnacle of dwarven reality warping. You can put a goblin in a glass one, fill it with water, put the cage in the water, and the goblin won't drown.

Speaking of keas, one of the gods of my dwarves takes the form of a male kea.

[EvilBob22]

Minecart quantum stockpile at the bottom of a deep shaft.

Or, my current setup, minecart quantum stockpile that I channeled to the surface above (to make it a "surface" tile that never generates miasma) and then roofed back over.

This is my typical M.O. for refuse (although I do it closer to the surface, with the only path there through a bunch of war dogs and citizens).  I also usually build my butcher shop right next to it and do the channel out an re-roof trick on it too.  It never generates miasma and is close to whatever animals are brought in.

Actually I installed floor bars up on the surface for the RP factor (ventilation), not sure if necros can "see" through the floor bars to animate things, so far they've tried to walk in the front door instead.

They can see through and animate things through vertical bars, and even windows.  I'm not totally sure on floor bars, but I wonder if the deepness of your pit made it too far to see anyway.

Alternatively, I built a necromancer trap outdoors, don't know if it works on necros yet but it definitely works on dumbass herbalists.
...snip complex trap...

Necros are not trap avoid, so a simple cage trap will work on them.  It sounds like that happened in the original post.

Speaking of the OP, I'd say you did quite well.  You made some noob mistakes, but that is to be expected.  Welcome to the !!FUN!!.

[squidgen]

I am still wondering how a random donkey hair caused mass panic in my store rooms. Oh, and thanks for all the welcomes! Currently I am murdering all the monkeys on my map after one got into my fortress. Hopefully, no necromancer will show up this time.

[dewboy]

I've been playing this for like 1 1/2 years and never found any undead. you my friend, are ballzy for a newb.


Welcome to the MADNESS. 

[Loud Whispers]

It's always the birds...

[Bobnova]

My air vent thing is only 3 or 4 z levels from surface to refuse, but I don't think any necros have showed up since I installed it.
Previously it was outdoors, which didn't turn out very well.

Automated traps are more fun than cage traps

[EvilBob22]

I am still wondering how a random donkey hair caused mass panic in my store rooms. Oh, and thanks for all the welcomes! Currently I am murdering all the monkeys on my map after one got into my fortress. Hopefully, no necromancer will show up this time.

That does seem a little extreme when you put it that way.  What is happening is that it is hostile to your civilization, and citizens run away from hostiles, even when they are really weak -- although there are some exceptions to that rule.