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[Argembarger]

Beats me.

We are definitely !!AT WAR!! with the goblins. Or, at least, the embark screen said we were.

[Monitor Lisard]

This post totally needs more updates.



"Goblins? Well, that was expected. Those green douchebags have been tryin' to take over dwarven business sinse the queen died." - Lisard snickered - "Heck, we're the first trading outpost that tries to rebel against goblin trade laws. Better get ready for a siege. Gotta buy myself a crossbow or a battle axe."

[Argembarger]

...'Argembanger'?

those green bastards

[Monitor Lisard]

...'Argembanger'?

those green bastards

"ARGEM-WHAT? They're paying for that."

Dwarven portraits aren't my strongest part. Still, I decided to do some. Here's Borderlands-style Argembarger. If you like it, I can do other dwarves.

[Argembarger]

((that dwarf looks suspiciously like me IRL))

[Argembarger]

Diary of 'Argembarger' Arrosudil

11th Galena, 551

The badger men are out in force, making a big show of going berserk, and then backing off. Just like coward goblins would.

The giant hamsters are out too, and the giant peach-faced lovebirds. What kinda place is this, anyway?

Since Saint doesn't seem to have any skills worth anything, I've decided to make him our first useless noble vital bureaucrat. He can take care of work orders and count all the crap we've been piling up over the weeks. He can even be our broker, for whatever that's worth. He can have a table at the little dining room. When we get some chairs in. Eventually.

<sup>Humble farm of destiny.


Humble (unfinished) dining area of destiny.</sup>

Our food supply is stable. I've been personally leading the efforts to gather as much workable stone as possible. There's a lot to do around here! But most importantly, I've been keeping our stonecutters and masons working round the clock. Half the fortress is on stone hauling duty. It's glorious.

<sup>Humble mines of destiny.


The best fuckin' fortress ever.</sup>

We're working outside, for now. It's easier that way. I have enough to worry about without concerning myself with piddling things like 'urban planning'.

-Argembarger

[Argembarger]

Diary of 'Argembarger' Arrosudil

15th Timber, 551

It should be about time for our brothers to bring us our first shipment of delightful goods.

^Hmmmm....

Yeah, time to cut down the forests. Just in case.

^{Fuck 'em.}

-Argembarger

[Argembarger]

Diary of 'Argembarger' Arrosudil

28th Timber, 551

Oh, yay

^{Oh, yay}

^{Obvious flattery.}

I knew they would recognize our excellence! I... didn't expect it to happen this soon, but whatever, I'll take i-

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

^{holy idräth singing fish}

...this season only

everything must go

-Argembarger

[Argembarger]

Diary of 'Argembarger' Arrosudil

27th Moonstone, 551

^uh

Well, fuck you too! Go home to your stinking goblins! Take your worthless junk with you! You're just lucky that you have some kind of bizarre force field keeping us from seizing your goods. Cheap bastards.

Seriously, Diary, they wouldn't even sell us a little bit of cheese for all of these lovely crafts?

Just wait until they come back next year. They'll know we mean business.

And by business, I mean... business.

^{What we want.}

^{What they want.}

I told them to bring as much of every possible thing that they could next year. Because they'll see.

-Argembanrger

((Seriously, I was pretty helpless to do any trading at all this time. I'm tempted to relax the broker requirement... but I don't want to. Once our fortress is exorbitantly wealthy, we should be able to actually pull these kinds of trades off at the drop of a hat.

However, I think that our Dwarven caravans are naturally going to be an exemption to the Buy All Or Seize rule... since they can't actually be seized from.

Oh, and yes, I did set all possible trade goods to max priority. Sorry next player! It was actually kind of fun to do. I just held 6 and 2 down, and tapped + every time a list got finished. Simple and easy and entertaining to observe.))

[Argembarger]

Diary of 'Argembarger' Arrosudil

1st Granite, 552

Well... I've personally had enough of this whole management thing. I can't be wasting my time telling everyone what to do, when I could be helping them get crap and make crap to sell crap to crappy dwarves! No one listens to me, anyway. I told everyone to dump their clothes in the garbage, and I forbade them from wearing anything but their own pants, but no one cared. Maybe if they did what I told them, we would have been able to secure a good deal with those merchants.

Oh well. I'm heading back to the mines. I'll let Dwarven Democracy decide who will take up my burden.

And as Dwarven Democracy is wont to do, I fully expect a nearly random filling of the vacuum of power.

Maybe we won't get killed by fucking goblins.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Here's the save.

http://dffd.wimbli.com/file.php?id=7774

Full exports of the fortress are included in the save download.

Good luck, Dwarvinator!

Sorry for the poor state of the fort. It's actually been quite some time since last I played with any degree of seriousness.

[Dwarvinator]

Just letting you know I'm on it.
Just looking here I think you've done a smashing job setting up. Nice to see that big reservoir and fields already in place. I have a cunning plan which may, unfortunately, result in the populace being reduced to wearing Elven cod-pieces. Such is the whim of an Oniomaniac...

[Dwarvinator]

I like the way the beds have been left up against a wall in the main entryway. How considerate to leave hapless dorfs in such an unrivaled situation to be murdered in their beds! Also there only seems to be one thieving pad trade depot - perhaps a little re-modelling is required, since there doesn't even appear to be a single door in the place.
I have drafted pretty much everyone into the militia known as The Bold Dyes. An awe-inspiring name if ever there was one. "Flee, Goblin, afore I set your silk loincloth with permanent dyes of laughable hue!"
At present, however, rather than violence, this military grouping's purpose is primarily to strip the Dorfs of everything but their pants. I'm even taking their shoes. I may have to send them on a short military manouvre to ensure they are properly 'uniformed'. Incidently, this is 'Elven Codpiece' on the uniforms menu. Anyway, we'll see how that pans out.
Additionally, outdoor workshops are going to be, er, out, and indoor workshops are going to be, erm, in. Before that we're going to rationalise the ration situation. As an added bonus Fikod Letmosamil has just turfed out a stash of Tigereyes whilst carving out the new brewhouse, those should come in handy.

^{Shiny things.}

And whilst all that gets underway...the shit hits the fan in the form of one Giant Preying Mantis. Aaargh! Fortunately, although alarming, it appears to be harmless. He'll keep...for now...

^{Horrified awe soon turned to scorn.}

Some badger people knocking around. They seem to be doing the Conga - so no worries with them, either...for the time being.
It's mid-spring, and things are rolling fairly well - workshops are now indoors. Booze, of which there was none, is being produced. Started tweaking stockpiles a bit. I've changed the Elven Codpiece 'uniform' to include footwear, since I noticed Tulon Rovoddatur seemed to be miffed about having no shoes. Actually, a lot miffed. Eek.
So, we lost a bit of production during the re-organisation but I feel we more than made up for that with all the clothes that were stolen donated through the militarisation wheeze process. I'm going to leave it at one squad, for now, to minimise any complications that might arise using this method.
Immigration has just occurred, and we are now up to thirty souls.
There were going to be pics, except Photobucket was asking me for a password, preposterous thing. Prob'ly sort that out later. Sorted.
More shortly...
Edit: Typos and whatnot.

[Monitor Lisard]

So, we lost a bit of production during the re-organisation but I feel we more than made up for that with all the clothes that were stolen donated through the militarisation wheeze process. I'm goi

"Ahem. This is rather awkward. Can I have my robe back? I don't mind being ducking stripped off my posessions giving some of my worn out dresses for the greater good, but still..."

So, basically, before giving all dwarves what they want and becoming the mist prosperous fort ever, we expropriate their clothes and all their owned stuff.

[Argembarger]

Just looking here I think you've done a smashing job setting up.

Hey, thanks mate. That's the hell of playing just the first year I guess. So many things to do, and no time whatsoever in which to do them.

So, basically, before giving all dwarves what they want and becoming the mist prosperous fort ever, we expropriate their clothes and all their owned stuff.

A small price to pay for capitalism

[callisto8413]

Hey, thanks mate. That's the hell of playing just the first year I guess. So many things to do, and no time whatsoever in which to do them.

You did a great job.  First year is always the hardest.  I once had a settlement of 6 Dwarfs wiped out, after setting everything up, by one wererat!