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Author Topic: The most horrible thing you've ever done in DF  (Read 22096 times)

Whackjob

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Re: The most horrible thing you've ever done in DF
« Reply #75 on: June 14, 2013, 04:18:21 pm »

The important thing, I suppose, is will dwarves intelligently use rideable minecarts to get to places, or will they just ride it to fill out a task?  If I use a cartjumper splashdown pool thing for an entrance, will dwarves know to use it to get in and out side?
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Lielac

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Re: The most horrible thing you've ever done in DF
« Reply #76 on: June 14, 2013, 04:20:54 pm »

The important thing, I suppose, is will dwarves intelligently use rideable minecarts to get to places, or will they just ride it to fill out a task?  If I use a cartjumper splashdown pool thing for an entrance, will dwarves know to use it to get in and out side?

...

Quote
dwarves intelligently

Not in this release.

(No. They only do it if you tell them to.)
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Lielac likes adamantine, magnetite, marble, the color olive green, battle axes, cats for their aloofness, dragons for their terrible majesty, women for their beauty, and the Oxford comma for its disambiguating properties. When possible, she prefers to consume pear cider and nectarines. She absolutely detests kobolds.

EvilBob22

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Re: The most horrible thing you've ever done in DF
« Reply #77 on: June 14, 2013, 04:24:48 pm »

The important thing, I suppose, is will dwarves intelligently use rideable minecarts to get to places, or will they just ride it to fill out a task?  If I use a cartjumper splashdown pool thing for an entrance, will dwarves know to use it to get in and out side?

...

Quote
dwarves intelligently

Not in this release.

(No. They only do it if you tell them to.)
But you could use an outdoor minecart on an impulse driven track to get migrants into an otherwise completely sealed fort.
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I will run the experiment to completion anyway, however. Even if the only reason why there is a punctured equilibrium in the fortress is because I have been brutally butchering babies
EDIT: I just remembered that dwarves can't equip halberds. That might explain why the squads that use them always die.

ORCACommander

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Re: The most horrible thing you've ever done in DF
« Reply #78 on: June 14, 2013, 05:36:49 pm »

the landing platform can just be a track stop on maximum break since the law of inertia does not apply to stopping carts with them
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Shoruke

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Re: The most horrible thing you've ever done in DF
« Reply #79 on: June 14, 2013, 06:15:59 pm »

There was one time I decided a Noble had pissed me off one too many times, so I build a small magma reservoir next to his room, locked him in, and flooded his room with 1/7 magma. I watched his wounds grow steadily worse, likely screaming in pain as he stood on feet burning hotter and more painfully with every second, until his body could no longer allow him to keep his torso away from his death. He died of blood loss, was drowning at the time, to say nothing of how many physical injuries he had.

One time I wanted to see how the local troglodytes would fare against a Forgotten Beast, who was at the bottom of a small pit that had no walkable path down to it. So I set up a simple trap: first, wall off the path to where the trogs are camped. Chain a cat to a post, and build a bridge over the pit. Tear down the wall, wait for the trogs to decide they want to eat some fresh cat, and dump them on the FB. They lost, the FB had skin-melting spores or something. PUDDLES of Troglodyte, if you don't mind.

But the worst thing I've done was... to my computer, along with all the cats.
This was back before the introduction of the caverns and the magma sea, so digging out the entire map was possible.
And I did.
I embarked with 6 novice miners and a herbalist/brewer, and 6 pickaxes, and all the cats. ALL OF THE CATS.
I channeled away the four sides of every layer of the map, and all but one last square of the bottom layer. The entire map area was ready to collapse, after I pull the lever. I told a Dwarf to pull the lever, and in those few seconds before the pillar disappeared and collapsed the world, I saved the game, and exited the program.
Then I opened up the Raw files.
I made cats very, very hot, but not immune to heat.
I gave them the Sever On Break flag, so that they explode into pieces when hurt. Save the changes, open the program back up, and resume.
The destruction... was absolute, and terrible, and awesome, in the most literal sense of the word.
For the last few seconds of their life, the cats burned. Then the whole world went away, and those underground were crushed. Not that it happened instantly, of course, it took about 12 minutes for my poor laptop to figure out where to put ALL OF THAT FUCKING ROCK. But even after the rock settled, even after the dust settled, even after the pieces of various Dwarves had settled, the destruction was not over. The cats on the surface (and there were plenty of those) were still on fire. Some rolled around on the ground, which was suddenly devoid of grass, mewling away their pitiful last breaths, as their limbs burned and broke and splintered. Some had exploded into pieces in midair, and had been strewn all over the place, leaving the newly-bared ground covered in gore and nothing else.

By the end of it, everything had either been burned, exploded, or crushed to death, save for one Dwarf fortunate enough to have been assigned to pull the lever on the surface, who survived- for a short time- with his one unbroken arm and not a lot else.
« Last Edit: June 14, 2013, 08:55:50 pm by shoruke »
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The Unforgotten Beast, Shoruke, has come! A pale-skinned human. It has heterochromatic eyes and moves in an unpredictable manner. Beware its rapier wit!

Solon64

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Re: The most horrible thing you've ever done in DF
« Reply #80 on: June 14, 2013, 08:04:23 pm »

I once Casque of Amontillado'd a dwarf zombie, who was in a reanimating biome, by dumping his body in a hole beneath the dining hall, then flooring over it.

For that forts remaining three years, every dwarf who ate in that dining hall dined to the horrific melody of the Damned scratching at the floorboards, trying to escape his eternal prison. I imagine it moaning and shuffling around in its small basement.

I feel like that would be a HORRIBLE dining experience. Good Armok.
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PS: Seriously, you must have, like, super-getting-lost skills. You could go missing in a straight corridor and impale yourself on flat ground if I don't tell you where to go.

Ringsea

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Re: The most horrible thing you've ever done in DF
« Reply #81 on: June 14, 2013, 08:42:12 pm »

Only in the darkest stories do you hear of the long-lost horrors of the Mountainhomes "Greatersilvers".

The fort was a semi-above ground one, as in there were several homes and apartments on the surface, but much of the storage and all of the workshops were underground. The fort was a huge city of a hundred dwarves living in tall, stone towers.

From the outside, all was perfect.

What the stories say, however, carves a much different engraving.

Simple traps such as a lever that sends a spear through the puller that was often assigned to be pulled by a random dwarf whenever the population was too big. In a fort of 100, there were 10 of these devices throughout the fort. Despite the fact that they were hardly used, at least 2 pregnant women died there.

The tallest tower in all the fort was called "The Pull". Prisoners would be taken to the top to be let to their own devices on a rope. They were let to wander around, knowing that they had a death sentence no matter what. It was just a matter of when. Sometimes, when the prisoners least expected it, I'd have a dwarf pull the death-lever, and all of them would fall to their deaths. Sometimes I'd forget, and they'd starve in paranoia.

There was a small bridge over a lava pit used as a dump. Stack the trash and Goblin prisoners on the bridge, and pull the lever. Sometimes cats and children "somehow" ended up there.
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chris_strain

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Re: The most horrible thing you've ever done in DF
« Reply #82 on: June 14, 2013, 08:49:16 pm »

I once spent the entire life of a fortress on peaceful trading terms with the elves... even.. saving them from gobbo ambushes at times.   :-[

I have since learned the error of my ways and always build my trade depot with airlocks and a means to fill the room with either water or a flood of crossbow bolts from my militia.
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Whackjob

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Re: The most horrible thing you've ever done in DF
« Reply #83 on: June 14, 2013, 09:04:26 pm »

I once spent the entire life of a fortress on peaceful trading terms with the elves... even.. saving them from gobbo ambushes at times.   :-[

I have since learned the error of my ways and always build my trade depot with airlocks and a means to fill the room with either water or a flood of crossbow bolts from my militia.

Not ironic enough.  Fill a minecart full of logs, then fire it shotgun style into them.
Live by the forest, die by the forest.
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chris_strain

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Re: The most horrible thing you've ever done in DF
« Reply #84 on: June 14, 2013, 09:23:52 pm »

Not ironic enough.  Fill a minecart full of logs, then fire it shotgun style into them.
Live by the forest, die by the forest.

I still prefer wooden bolts. They take longer to die and train my militia at the same time. My next fort will be modded to use sentient remains and be at war with the hippies. Our primary economy will be elf bone crafts, farmed with elf bone bolts. By making the bolts out of elf bones, I'll be returning their fallen kin to them.. albeit at a somewhat fatal velocity. :)
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Whackjob

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Re: The most horrible thing you've ever done in DF
« Reply #85 on: June 14, 2013, 09:47:28 pm »

I still prefer wooden bolts. They take longer to die and train my militia at the same time. My next fort will be modded to use sentient remains and be at war with the hippies. Our primary economy will be elf bone crafts, farmed with elf bone bolts. By making the bolts out of elf bones, I'll be returning their fallen kin to them.. albeit at a somewhat fatal velocity. :)

This sounds like it requires a simulation.  STAND BACK!  I'm going to do SCIENCE!



Ok, nevermind.  This sucks.  I'll just take your word for it.
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Urist Da Vinci

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Re: The most horrible thing you've ever done in DF
« Reply #86 on: June 14, 2013, 10:27:59 pm »

Recently used DFHack to swap souls between two dwarves, and then to swap a dwarf's soul with that of a yak. To top it off, I swapped the soul of a living male dwarven child with that of a skilled female soldier who had been dead for several years. This caused the description of the child to use both "He" and "She", among other oddities.

Gentlefish

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Re: The most horrible thing you've ever done in DF
« Reply #87 on: June 14, 2013, 11:22:52 pm »

Recently used DFHack to swap souls between two dwarves, and then to swap a dwarf's soul with that of a yak. To top it off, I swapped the soul of a living male dwarven child with that of a skilled female soldier who had been dead for several years. This caused the description of the child to use both "He" and "She", among other oddities.

I would LOVE a few screencaps of that kid.

Do soul attributes transfer, along with moods and skills?

Larix

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Re: The most horrible thing you've ever done in DF
« Reply #88 on: June 15, 2013, 03:05:43 am »

I [...]always build my trade depot with airlocks and a means to fill the room with either water or a flood of crossbow bolts from my militia.

That is indeed horrible on two counts. What have the poor traders ever done to you to deserve such treatment? The unfriendly things elves say to you are just their reaction to _you_ being unspeakably rude to them (according to their customs).

And the other thing is that you're handling them like some lily-livered coward. Hiding behind airlocks, keeping your distance? Elf-slaying has to be done in close combat, by squads entirely equipped in wood.


I used to kill prisoners for a good long while. Until i realised that by doing so, i was _worse than the goblins_ - those actually make their prisoners members of their civs. I've since reformed and chain all my prisoners up in jail cells.
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Urist Mc Dwarf

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Re: The most horrible thing you've ever done in DF
« Reply #89 on: June 15, 2013, 05:41:08 am »



I used to kill prisoners for a good long while. Until i realised that by doing so, i was _worse than the goblins_ - those actually make their prisoners members of their civs. I've since reformed and chain all my prisoners up in jail cells.
[/quote]

And then kill them?
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