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[lawastooshort]

Turn One Hundred and Eighteen

The Temple of Sef...

Shoot the ninjas!

Seeing Bukkar’s head roll about on the floor, Whiz calmly raises his crossbows, one in each hand and one at each ninja, and fires! …The burning bleeding one is pierced right through the face, and drops down dead; the other one is pierced through the hair, and doesn’t!

Continue the attack!

Sprint up the slope for a moment, then sprint back down with a Sprint of Fury, and chop one of the two ninjas into pieces. Both, if a single swing of the axe and the tranquillity of my fury allows.

The remaining ninja thinks about mercilessly stabbing Bukkar through the neck stump, but realises it would be more realistic to continue attacking his current foe, which is Gervedder, and so slices at the messenger’s left knee, …completely missing as Gervedder turns to run away, and then immediately turns back to run towards!

With a flaming magical axe coming down upon his gut, the ninja steps aside at just the last moment, …merely taking a nasty looking bleeding and burning cut! However, looking round and seeing no more comrades in the room, except the lovestruck hippo, he suddenly and conveniently falls over and dies.

Steal Jack from that hussie! She's already got a squid! TAME THAT HIPPO!

...or if that fails, TAME HER SQUID IN RETALIATION!

Do hippo stuff!

Just then, Sylvanna is struck by a fit of jealous hippo rage, and rolls to tame that hippo! She sidles up to the unexpecting zombie hulk, and tickles him behind the ear whilst offering him a hippo biscuit – and meets with instant success!

…Jack turns round, nuzzling Sylvanna’s knee with his cheery snout in such an affectionate manner that Lord Squid, the hussie’s squid, is overwhelmed by a fit of jealous human rage! He want him some of that love and affection! The squid starts gently nuzzling Sylvanna’s other knee with his squiddy squidcheek; Foxglove feels the admiration of her squid escaping her and spins round in furious anger, and one of her many eels slips out of her pocket, flying through the air and into Sylvanna’s face!

“My face!” cries Sylvanna, frantically slapping the eel off the aforementioned face, “My face!” she cries again, before turning to flee to the other side of the room away from this intense affection and this brutal eel-based assault.

Jack and the squid chase after her, get mostway across the room, slip on something, stop, and stare at each other like bandits for several seconds and then leap one upon the other and start a vicious wrestle to the death!

*gpkkhh*
*bubbling sounds*

Scoop up my head and hop into my barrel. Gesture to Roñardo to haul me away to safety! Oh, and extinguish my stump and hold my head to it.
Oh, and Roñardo, get me a health potion!

Meanwhile, Bukkar’s lost his head again, …and, turning to face the wall, gestures expressively to it to haul him away to safety. Roñardo brings him a health potion but, Bukkar having no head, he can’t figure out where to put it! Roñardo has a sudden flash of clarity, and starts searching about on the floor for wherever his beloved master’s head might have rolled to, when suddenly there’s a wild dash of squid and hippo, and the herd of Sylvanna’s admirers lovestampedes the head to a slimy paste!

Roñardo looks understandably crestfallen, but then notices that Bukkar’s neckstump has at least stopped burning, so there’s that.

Action: Ride down upon the ninjas with zombie hippo bared!

Seeing her hippo AND her squid desert her for – and even fight over – another woman, Lady Foxglove is calm and imperious: she sprints daintily around Bukkar’s squashed head and leaps onto the wrestling Jack the Hippo’s back.

"Ride on, Lord Hippo Zed!" she cries, …and he does!

Roaring a great roar, Jack makes it known for miles around (to anyone that can understand Hippo) that Lady Foxglove is the one Lady for him! He rides about in a circle round the room, trampling as many ninja bodies as he can, purring with pleasure.

Deciding that discretion is the better part of valor, Tackov resolves to simply finish extinguishing self.

DroneBongo will eat some delicious ninja.

…As this is going on, Tackov resolves to stop burning, and lo! He does. And, as he does so, he notices DroneBongo scampering about the room, gobbling up bits of ninja.

Spoiler: GM notes (click to show/hide)

Mission: Retrieve the Magical Mandolin Part



Turn summary:
Bukkar’s head is squashed, all the ninjas are dead, Sylvanna has a squid and Foxglove has a hippo.

Current Players:

Spoiler: Tackov Cedtry, Toaster (click to show/hide)

Name: Tackov Cedtry
Class: Level 4 Gusty Wind Mage
Status: +1 missile defence. +1 to future gut damage. -1 to melee. +1 left leg defence. -1 to feet.
Health: [HP: 25/65] | Severed Guts! | Magical Saucepan Leg | Severed Foot!
Abilities: Airfist I, Magical Typhoon I, Wind Blast I, Wind Blast II, Wind Step I, Squishy, Sissy Slap Fight
Inventory: Minor Mana Potion x1, Scroll of Beginner’s Fireball x1, Mouldy Wizard Hat, You Bastard the Mangy Donkey, Cloak of Camouflage, 524 Green Farthings, 206 Yuros, Solid Gold Lingerie x 2, a squashed and severed foot (own), a massive angry boulder stalker, Burny-Vomity-Nakedy Wand; Robe of Improved Magic, Holy Incendiary Grenade of Sef.

Spoiler: Whiz, Chink (click to show/hide)

Name: Whiz
Class: Level 4 Whiznificent Whiz Wiz(ard)
Status: +1 to lower leg, groin, head and breast defence. -1 to social interaction except with rats. +1 to balancing. +1 to strength. Last in initiative rolls. Shielded: +2 to defence for 1 turns.
Health: [HP: 50/90] | Giant Rat’s Tail! Mummy!
Abilities: Competent Crossbow User, Red Carpet, Shield I, Gee, Mr. Whiz, You Sure Are Fast! Gee, Mr. Whiz, You Sure Are Fast II, Obviously a Powerful Wizard, It’ll Make You Blind!
Inventory: Crossbow x2, Unlimited Quiver, Raider’s Dress of Shin Protection, 11 Yuros, Middling Mana Potion x1, Cutlass,  Three daggers, Minor Health Potion x1, +1 Bolt of Accuracy x4, +1 Bolt of Burning x3, +1 Bolt of Paralysis x1, Carrying Serf x0 (not currently mounted), 0 Green Farthings, Steel Groinplate, Steel Helmet, Steel Breastplate.

Spoiler: Gervedder Vietzo, Harry Baldman (click to show/hide)

Name: Gervedder Vietzo
Class: Level 4 Damaged Opportunistic Messenger
Status: +1 to gut and chest defence. +1 defence if moves. +1 to hit with axe (flaming).
Health: [HP: 90/90] Extra Long Legs!
Abilities: Gauntlet, Sprint of Fury,Just a Brainflesh Wound, Nimble Feet, This Messenger Delivers, Important, Stop For Directions
Inventory: Crossbow, Unlimited Quiver, 0 bandages, 0 Yuros, Iron Cuirass, Crossbow, Gerald the Mule, Two weeks rations and a bedroll, Apprentice Herbalist's Manual, Herbalist's Containers x5, Large Cork x1, Masterwork Flaming Axe of Death.

Spoiler: Lady Foxglove Vainglorious the III, Dwarmin (click to show/hide)

Name: Lady Foxglove Vainglorious the III
Class: Level 4 Glamorous Ravenhaired Crusader
Status: +1 to head, chest and groinbone defence. Dodges fist missile hit. -1 to initiative and balancing.
Health: [HP: 90/90] | Broken Head
Abilities: Nonchalant Dodge, Ravena’s Ear, Silent as a Raven’s Wing,  Opportunistic, Honeyed Tongue, Vain, Self-Reliance
Inventory: The Raven's Wingblade, Minor Health Potion x1, Crossbow, Unlimited Quiver, Masterwork Helm, Flying Warsquid, Sword, Mercenary Squidrider Uniform, Masterwork Poledancing Pole, chainmail lingerie, 34 Yuros, 10 bandages, Decent provisions (day) x4, Live eel x649, Red dragon-scale vest, Curse Grenade of the Slimy Eel.

Spoiler: Bukkar Crangrom, Xantalos (click to show/hide)

Name: Bukkar Crangrom
Class: Level 4 Sprayin' Ragin' Mage
Status: Naked! Headless! -2 to dodge.
Health: [HP: 06/90] | The Vomiting! | Broken Guts | Blessed By the Godses | Stony Facelegthing | The Burning!
Abilities: Whirlwind Rage I, Rage Flight, Rage Lazors I, Ass of the Flaming Foot I, Lightning Fist I, Always Looking For a Fight, Always Hungover
Inventory: Crossbow, 0 Green Farthings, Large Sealed Bling Barrel, Large Cork x1, pick.

Spoiler: Sylvanna the Felonious, IronyOwl (click to show/hide)

Name: Sylvanna the Felonious
Class: Level 4 Alchemical Flesh Mechanic
Status:
Health: [HP: 70/90]
Abilities: Construct Control I, Craft Corpse Glue I, Craft Alchemical Corpse Glue I, Corpse Assimilation , Crawly Hands
Inventory: A dead kobold, clothes, Buckler of Sharp Death, 0x Glue, Hat of Command.

Spoiler: Tackov Cedtry’s DroneBongo of Vengeances (click to show/hide)

Name: Rattlefang’s DroneBongo of Vengeances
Class: Level 2 Shamanic Death Tambourine
Health: [HP: 35/35]
Abilities: Two Legged Death Tambourine, Incredibly Sharp Teeth

Spoiler: Jack the Hippo (click to show/hide)

Name: Jack the Hippo
Class: Hungry Hungry Zombie Hippo
Health: [HP: 125/200] | Severed rear left leg

[Harry Baldman]

"Onward, I sup-hm. Wait."

Take one or more of the dead ninjas, and attach their dead head, if available, to Bukkar's vacant head stump.

[Dwarmin]

"Well, that's it for the ninjas.  Time for some fashion piracy! Is that real black  silk?!" She shrieked, leaping upon the corpses with predatory rage, to check the brand names on the tags.

Action: Loot some stealthy ninja swag  to compliment my formal wear!

[lawastooshort]

Primarily because I couldn’t make the time to keep this regular, I feel that it has somewhat lost its way and focus, as it were.

My motivation is further sapped by feeling that it is not as good as I would like – this is, again, mostly due to not having enough time to keep a complicated world and plot living and advancing.

I’m not sure I can do much about the time, as work and family severely limit my time (more than they did two years ago as I have more family and more work) and also play in a bloodbowl league which takes at least one evening a week.


So I feel I have three options, and would appreciate any thoughts.

1/ motivate myself to manage my time better and spend a couple of hours a week on this;
2/ drop it, and spend my forum time on the games I play in;
3/ drop it, and motivate myself by starting a new game in a few days.

1/ would not be ideal as forcing yourself to carry on a game you are beginning to doubt is never ideal, but 2/ and 3/ would mean dropping some lovely players and characters. 2/ would leave that rtd itch still itching, and 3/ would probably scratch that itch and generate the participation of some lovely players and characters, whilst risking the time problem again – although if I make it a finite plot rather than a 5 year one that might help the focus.

I am unsure.

[Tiruin]

You could put it on a hiatus, given that I see all options are leaning on extremes.

I put mine on an (unannounced) one and...it turned out pretty well. Got RL taken care of anyway, and the players are pretty peachy about it.
^{I'm voting for one but that might sound like enforced obligation :X
Your choice is respected either way.}

[IronyOwl]

I hate to say it, but if you're just not happy with this one, trying to force-maintain it probably isn't going to go well. Giving up GMing is unlikely to be much better.

That leaves only the risk and thrill of trying again. Of life, lawas. Of life.

[Toaster]

I'll be interested no matter which course you take.

[Harry Baldman]

I hate to say it, but if you're just not happy with this one, trying to force-maintain it probably isn't going to go well. Giving up GMing is unlikely to be much better.

That leaves only the risk and thrill of trying again. Of life, lawas. Of life.

I fundamentally agree with this, although don't feel obligated to run another game if you feel you can't do it at a reasonable standard of quality.

[Xantalos]

Honestly, whichever you want to do is fine by me.

[Dwarmin]

Arg <<

Will comment more later...

[lawastooshort]

Hello! Dwarmin has argged me from the depths of my existential GM crisis, and I have decided upon option 4: invigorating changes to the rules a la Errol (but with more success with regards to actually invigorating the game), and with the intention of streamlining things for the GM and generally speeding things up. I also found the plot outline document, which will help.

I am proposing the below changes to the rules in the OP and would welcome, although possibly not implement (unless you can think of better stats but no more than 6), comments and suggestions.

These changes will entail reworking character sheets slightly, which will also be fun.

Proposed changes:
Character sheets to be simplified so I have less to keep track of – main sheets to be kept on first page, only HP and MP to be recorded at end of turns.

Abilities/spells with cooldowns to be replaced with abilities/spells with MP cost (so I have less to keep track of). This will require some kind of balancing on my part to make it all fair.

Harry Baldman’s Exploding Dice to be used!  This is just sensible, really. I might also drop the use of abbr tags.

Statification of the character sheets!

Spoiler: Character Sheet (click to show/hide)

Stats: There are FIVE stats. You have 5 (+1 per character level) points to distribute amongst them.
Dodge: (where 0=-1 to rolls; 3=+1 to rolls) (affects i.e. dodging)
Agility: (where 0=-1 to rolls; 3=+1 to rolls) (affects i.e. light weapon melee, or shooting)
Strength: (where 0=-1 to rolls; 3=+1 to rolls) (affects i.e. non-light weapon melee)

Toughness: (where 1=1HP in addition to 1HP per character level)

Mental Points: (named as appropriate for your character: Mana Points; Anger Points; etc.) (instead of cooldowns, your abilities would now have MP cost – more for more powerful things, and less for less. This would enable, for example, the casting of half a dozen fireballs in one turn, if you wanted) (where 1=1 point, which are regained at the rate of 1 per non-bleeding/burning non-combat turn).

Spoiler: Rules (click to show/hide)

Rolls will be standard rtd d6 rolls.

Natural ones [or double ones if applicable] are particularly bad; natural sixes are overshoots. Twos after modifiers fail; fives after modifiers succeed. Fours and threes are kind of situational. A three at walking would succeed; a three at opening a locked door would not.

Natural ones and sixes will use the Exploding Dice as popularised by Harry Baldman to ascertain their seriousness.

Fight Accelerating Reasonable/Typical Standing Orders
You must supply a kind of “Standing Order” which describes what, in a typical combat situation your character would do for three turns – this is to speed up combat rather than let it transform into an endless trudge. These can be changed whenever you want.

Combat
Combat is opposing d6s for each attack; the positive difference will be the severity of wound inflicted.  Location will be randomised unless there is a good reason otherwise. The type of wound will depend on the type of attack. Here is a rough guide for Slashing / Piercing / Blunt / Burning attacks (other types of damage are also available):

Slash / Pierce / Smash / Burning Damage table:

1 Nothing / Nothing / Nothing / Nothing
2 Damaged / Damaged / Damaged; -1HP  / Burning; -1HP and -1HP per subsequent turn
3 Damaged  / Damaged  / Damaged; -2HP / Burning; -1HP and -1HP per subsequent turn
4 Slashed / Stabbed; -2HP and -1HP bleeding per subsequent turn / Mangled; Broken body part, -1HP / Severe Burning; 2x -1HP and -1HP per subsequent turn (two locations)
5 Severed / Severed / Smashed off; Loss of body part, -2HP and -1HP per subsequent turn / Burnt Off; Permanent loss of body part, -2HP
6 Slashed to Bits / Stabbed to Pieces / Smashed to Smithereens; Permanent loss of body part, -3HP and -1HP per subsequent turn / Exploded; Permanent loss of body part, -3HP and risk of spreading fire (rtd)

Healing by non-medical professionals is done at a -1 penalty; not having appropriate equipment gives a further -1 penalty.

HP are regained at 1 per non-bleeding/burning non-combat turn.

Damage Locations:
1 Right Foot (max 1HP loss)
2 Left Foot (max 1HP loss)
3 Right Leg
4 Left Leg
5 Groin
6 Guts
7 Right Arm
8 Left Arm
9 Right Chest
10 Left Chest
11 Face
12 Head

Overdrive Mode! (or; death)
If a character is reduced to 0HP then they will spend two turns dying. Any further damage sustained (this includes bleeding and burning) in those two turns will kill them; they can be saved by being brought above 0HP. However! They will not die in a turn in which they inflict at least 1HP of damage

Massive Overdrive Mode!
A player may on occasion suffer from a severed head. In real life, this is usually quite bad. In game terms, this is represented by being immediately reduced to 0HP, whereupon they will spend two turns dying. As any further damage sustained in those two turns will kill them, they must either receive immediate medical attention or keep inflicting damage to stay alive, as severing is usually accompanied by bleeding.

Overdrive Modes Summary
If a character is reduced to 0HP, they must receive successful medical attention before two non-inflicting-damage turns are over, or they die, for ever, whereupon Sylvanna will rejoice at having new raw materials.

Fighting Modes!
All melee fighting involves taking advantage of your opponent being an eejit. Therefore, if you roll a 6 whilst defending or your attacker rolls a 1 then you get a free and immediate counterattack.

You can choose to fight defensively instead of attacking. This will grant +1 to defence rolls against all melee attacks.

You can choose to fight protectively instead of attacking. This will grant +1 to defence rolls against all melee attacks against an adjacent ally.

You may choose to cast defensively instead of attacking. This will grant +1 to defence rolls against all melee attacks and still let you activate a magic ability.

[Harry Baldman]

I notice that there's no utility stat. No stats governing out-of-combat behavior, to be exact, such as Lady Foxglove's charisma or Sylvanna's "medicine".

Also, consider making Strength and Toughness a single stat, since "non-light weapon melee" is a pretty narrow sort of thing to specialize in.

Perhaps do the same with Agility and Dodge, while moving "light weapon melee" over to Strength as well.

Then you'd have MP, Dodgility and Strenghness, giving you room for more stats to assign to more non-combative uses.

[lawastooshort]

I notice that there's no utility stat. No stats governing out-of-combat behavior, to be exact, such as Lady Foxglove's charisma or Sylvanna's "medicine".

No. I will keep various abilities the same, so Foxglove will always (as she does now) have a standard no-cost bonus to this kind of role and Sylvanna will still have a once per day item creation.

I considered adding a sixth class specific stat, but I would have to choose this or it would be open to misuse...


edit: in fact, it would make more sense to have NO stats except MP and HP, which I would have to work out a way of assigning, and then transform any relevant abilities: bonuses and so on to melee, missile, utility stuff are already represented in these abilities.

second edit: ha, good ninjaing of each other and ourselves. I like those 3 stats. Not sure what non-combat stats I'd want though.

[Harry Baldman]

Maybe make it a tradeoff between MP and HP? Have more MP and less HP or vice versa?

[lawastooshort]

Maybe make it a tradeoff between MP and HP? Have more MP and less HP or vice versa?

Hmm, the worry with that I'd have is that, for example, Bukkar is a fighter needing HP to not die, but need MP to do his anger based moves. Whereas if there was Dodgility, Strengthness, and Mana, there'd be three to have a tradeoff between. Bukkar could forgo Dodgility to gain more Strengthness and M-anger Points. So he'd take damage easier and not be able to shoot well, but he'd inflict harder damage, have more HP to sustain damage, and be able to use his M-anger abilities.

Anyway, off for a few hours so will ponder it.