Turn One Hundred and ElevenThe Temple of Sef...Negotiate further!
Keep circling Eric and, should he not see reason before my turn comes along, slice him in the brain once again.
Wind Blast II the damn thing into the wall if it isn't talked down!
"I can't tell if it's working!" Sylvanna declares cheerfully, standing ankle-deep in... regurgitated slug mucous.
"He's obviously considering some sort of action, so our negotiation must be doing something."”Fnng fnnng fnnnnnng gnhhhhhah!”“Friends?”
”Gna-ffffffffffffffffffffffffffff!”“Oh. That’s disappointing.”
The monstrous slug rises on its hind legs and darts forward at Sylvanna’s face! Just then Gervedder’s Axe of Flame slices down into the hideous beast’s brain,
…causing a slight brainscratch and considerable brainfire!
With two separate brainfires, the slug’s time looks up, but being incredibly stupid he doesn’t realise it! Eric the monstrous slug is just about to do terrible slime- or violence-related things to Sylvanna’s face when Tackov ambles to the rescue!
"Avast!" he cries,
"Avast!"He aims his wizardy hands at the slug, and with a flash,
…the slug gently rolls over!
Sylvanna is saved!
Elsewhere…Get Roñardo fixed in veneer!
Let's try veneer. Gotta be classy.”Oh, senor! You know, nothing says classy like a good leg of solid oak! But. We will respect your wishes.”Hours pass, during which Bukkar falls asleep in the doctor’s waiting room a bit. He is suddenly awoken by the roaring noise of very definite tears of joy!
”Oh, senor!” cries, quite literally, Roñardo,
”Senor! My leg! It lives!”Roñardo shuffles on his knees to embrace his master, but Dr Juan warns him off.
”Mi amigo Roñardo. This is veneer. Very classy, but almost as flammable. You must take heed, and pay attention. Do not embrace your master! For flames are drawn to him likes moths to… for… a pauper’s… carriage… herring… the…”Deny responsibility for the crime to the vigilantes and run back to the shop of the guy who wanted the mother-in-law dead to collect the reward.
…”Yes it was, yer great murdering bastid! We’ll fecking ave you, yer gert git! Everyone has a little granny inside of them, you know! When you murder a granny, you murder a part of us! Come on lads, let’s get im!”Whiz begins to run.
The Granny Vigilantes being to run.
A run-off commences!
…And shortly finishes, as the vigilantes catch up with Whiz before he can even shuffle fully one score feet away!
Whiz notices, all of a sudden, with the safety of the armour shop more than a hundred feet hence, or thence, that the vigilantes all have pointy farm implements about their person.
Mission: Retrieve the Magical Mandolin Part
Map for IronyOwl and Tackov and Gervedder (they are by the red cross):
Current Players:Name: Tackov Cedtry
Class: Level 4 Gusty Wind Mage
Status: +1 missile defence. +1 to future gut damage. -1 to melee. +1 left leg defence. -1 to feet.
Health: [HP: 65/65] |
Severed Guts! |
Magical Saucepan Leg |
Severed Foot!Abilities: Airfist I,
Magical Typhoon I,
Wind Blast I,
Wind Blast II,
Wind Step I,
Squishy,
Sissy Slap FightInventory: Minor Mana Potion x1,
Scroll of Beginner’s Fireball x1,
Mouldy Wizard Hat, You Bastard the Mangy Donkey,
Cloak of Camouflage, 524 Green Farthings, 206 Yuros,
Solid Gold Lingerie x 2, a squashed and severed foot (own), a massive angry boulder stalker,
Burny-Vomity-Nakedy Wand;
Robe of Improved Magic,
Holy Incendiary Grenade of Sef.
Name: Whiz
Class: Level 4 Whiznificent Whiz Wiz(ard)
Status: +1 to lower leg defence. +1 to groin defence. -1 to social interaction except with rats. +1 to balancing. +1 to strength. Last in initiative rolls.
Health: [HP: 79/90] |
Giant Rat’s Tail! Mummy!Abilities: Competent Crossbow User,
Red Carpet,
Shield I,
Gee, Mr. Whiz, You Sure Are Fast! Gee, Mr. Whiz, You Sure Are Fast II,
Obviously a Powerful Wizard,
It’ll Make You Blind!Inventory: Crossbow x2, Unlimited Quiver,
Raider’s Dress of Shin Protection, 211 Yuros,
Middling Mana Potion x1, Cutlass, Three daggers,
Minor Health Potion x1, +1 Bolt of Accuracy x4, +1 Bolt of Burning x3, +1 Bolt of Paralysis x1,
Carrying Serf x0 (not currently mounted), 0 Green Farthings,
Steel Groinplate.
Name: Gervedder Vietzo
Class: Level 4 Damaged Opportunistic Messenger
Status: +1 to gut and chest defence. +1 defence if moves. +1 to hit with axe (flaming).
Health: [HP: 52/90]Abilities: Gauntlet,
Sprint of Fury,
Just a Brainflesh Wound,
Nimble Feet,
This Messenger Delivers,
Important,
Stop For DirectionsInventory: Crossbow, Unlimited Quiver, 0 bandages, 0 Yuros,
Iron Cuirass, Crossbow, Gerald the Mule, Two weeks rations and a bedroll,
Apprentice Herbalist's Manual,
Herbalist's Containers x5, Large Cork x1,
Masterwork Flaming Axe of Death.
Name: Lady Foxglove Vainglorious the III
Class: Level 4 Glamorous Ravenhaired Crusader
Status: +1 to head, chest and groinbone defence. Dodges fist missile hit. -1 to initiative and balancing.
Health: [HP: 70/90] |
Broken HeadAbilities: Nonchalant Dodge,
Ravena’s Ear,
Silent as a Raven’s Wing,
Opportunistic,
Honeyed Tongue,
Vain,
Self-RelianceInventory: The Raven's Wingblade,
Minor Health Potion x1, Crossbow, Unlimited Quiver,
Masterwork Helm,
Flying Warsquid, Sword,
Mercenary Squidrider Uniform,
Masterwork Poledancing Pole,
chainmail lingerie, 34 Yuros, 10 bandages, Decent provisions (day) x4, Live eel x649, Red dragon-scale vest,
Curse Grenade of the Slimy Eel.
Name: Bukkar Crangrom
Class: Level 4 Sprayin' Ragin' Mage
Status: Naked! Burning face!
Health: [HP: 80/90] |
The Vomiting! |
Broken Guts |
Blessed By the Godses |
Stony Facelegthing |
The Burning!Abilities: Whirlwind Rage I,
Rage Flight,
Rage Lazors I,
Ass of the Flaming Foot I,
Lightning Fist I,
Always Looking For a Fight,
Always HungoverInventory: Crossbow, 0 Green Farthings,
Large Sealed Bling Barrel, Large Cork x1, pick.
Name: Sylvanna the Felonious
Class: Level 4 Alchemical Flesh Mechanic
Status:Health: [HP: 90/90]Abilities: Construct Control I,
Craft Corpse Glue I,
Craft Alchemical Corpse Glue I,
Corpse Assimilation ,
Crawly HandsInventory: A dead kobold, clothes,
Buckler of Sharp Death, 1x Glue,
Hat of Command.
Name: Rattlefang’s DroneBongo of Vengeances
Class: Level 2 Shamanic Death Tambourine
Health: [HP: 35/35]Abilities: Two Legged Death Tambourine,
Incredibly Sharp Teeth Name: Eric The Monstrous Slug
Class: Level 4 Monstrous Death Slug
Health: [HP: 60/100] |
Burning brain x 2Abilities: Slimy Squeeze Attack,
Hideous Tendrils,
Slime Trail,
No Organs