Turn NinetyEat that guts! Chew it to pieces!
In the corridor near to Medha, Bukkar wrestles the sentient gutbeast on the floor, in a swill of gutjuice and cheap wine.
I'LL DIGEST THE HELL OUT OF YOU WITH MY OWN INTESTINES, YOU GUTS!He cries out angrily, before launching into a savage biting attack, gnawing heavily on the gut's face and ears – but his assault is ineffectual; he prises a length of gut from where it's wrapped implacably round his throat, and swings a fist, and then, as the gut tries to bite him in the groin he swings a defensive elbow, throwing the gut against the wall.
...It slithers down, and the two adversaries stare each other in the eye, and then Bukkar attacks flying feet first, misses completely, hits the wall, slides down like the gut before him, and lies powerless as the gut tears out his guts with a single brutal bite!
The gut circles the heavily damaged warrior, sneering through his long vicious teeth!
Wound Acquired: Bukkar Crangrom:
Extra Severed Guts!Medha: Headbutt any sentient legs that are accessible. Bandage up that bleeding with hands, which are now free.
Slowly crawling towards the gutcrippled stricken Bukkar comes Medha, who can see no legs. She traces a sticky pool of blood along the damp stone floor as the crawls, her own chest blood, from where her own superfluous ribs leapt out and abandoned her. As the gutfiend circles Bukkar, Medha creeps up, silent as a wheezing legless imbecile.
The gut is too occupied with sneering to hear.
Medha raises herself up, and with her last force lets herself fall back down, face first, into the back of the gut's head.
...Medha's fearsome face slices the gut's head right in two; it splits apart, showering Bukkar with internal gutslime as the young curse crafter collapses on top of the shattered foes.
...As she flails about on top of Bukkar and his dual-wielded mangled guts, she diverts some attention to bandaging her chest-holes, but fails miserably, and only ends up gently caressing Bukkar behind the ears with a piece of manky wet bandage.
Typhoon up Wind Blast II! If any legs get near me, Hand of Leprosy them right in the leg!
Inside the room, away from this bloody scene of horror and repressed longing, Tackov the Wind Mage is pinned in a corner by a bunch of legs.
"Back up, ye damned legs!" he wails, seeming to have caught a bad dose of Scottishness from his adversaries,
"Back up, or ye'll fecking regret it, ye wee shites!" The legs don't back up: one leaps through the air aiming itself footfirst at Tackov's teeth;
...as it approaches time seems to slow, and Tacko whips out a defensive hand and, channelling the necromantic doompower of his hat, he leprifies the crap out of the fiendish leg!
...Tackov inflicts instaleprosy on the leg's leg! The leg's leg falls off the leg! The legless leg stumbles and trips, and falls to the ground, where Tackov crushes its head with a stomp of his foot!
Action: More Arrows! More knees! Big prizes! I love it!
The legs are shaken, without even having witnessed the horrible doom of their guttish comrade a few feet away in the corridor - the awful power of the Naked Wizard Who Can Make Legs Fall Off Legs has them wincing and backing up as yon Naked Wizard commanded!
...The remaining legs sway from one side to the other, looking at one fell foe to the next, staring first at Tackov, before averting their eyes from his nudity, and then at Lady Foxglove, and finding themselves transfixed, for many of the legs are male. One leg has the temerity to advance, but Lady Foxglove bats him harmlessly away, and shoots him through the shin!
The leg howls in agony!
His comrades flee!
The shin-shattered leg crawls towards the door to join them.
Whiz: aid attempt to get wrapped up in healing Red Carpet.
Run over to Whiz, pick him up and then wrap him in his Red Carpet.
Luckily enough, the legs' morale broke before they could further damage the battered and bleeding Whiz, inches away from zero hitpoints.
"Hm."...Gervedder dashes over, bends down, picks up the very light Whizzard and hefts him onto his still hovering unnervingly in the middle of the room carpet, as the pale man moans in as helpful a manner as he can manage. It turns out to be a very helpful manner, in fact, and the red carpet seems to recognise its owner, and nuzzles its nose up against the bleeding unfortunate. Soaking in healing potion, Whiz soon begins to feel a bit better, and a heart-warming montage of comradely songs plays from nearby, on bagpipes.
Suddenly the red carpet vanishes into thin air, and Whiz plops back onto the hard ground a couple of feet below, like a large sack of blood-covered nudist potatoes.
Mission: Retrieve the Magical Mandolin Part from the Fortress of Koboldy Doom
Map: You are all in the room – except Medha is just outside the doorway, and Bukkar is a few squares north.
I have been thinking about requesting Marching Orders i.e. a couple of set reactions to hostile encounters, or, say, requesting more than just one move at a time when there are larger scale encounters. What do you think? Just so we don’t get held up with one person trading ineffectual blows with kobold zombie pirate hordes or something, when we could all be getting on with some intense RP with a reanimated severed body part.
Hey, no one answered last time!11! I think I will try to do small scale combats – i.e., like what Bukkar did against the gut, until they reach a sensible point – i.e. death or dismemberment, so if you ever want to specify what you might want to do next ROUND rather than just this TURN, so to speak, then feel free. Otherwise it'll probably be standard melee or missile attacks.
Current Players:Name: Tackov Cedtry
Class: Level 3 Gusty Wind Mage
Status: +1 missile defence. -1 to melee. Naked!
Health: [HP: 45/60] |
Severed Guts!Abilities: Magical Typhoon I,
Wind Blast I,
Wind Blast II,
Wind Step I,
Squishy,
Sissy Slap FightInventory: Minor Mana Potion x1,
Scroll of Beginner’s Fireball x1, one memorised use of:
Gee, Mr. Whiz, You Sure Are Fast! Mouldy Wizard Hat, bits of guts (own), You Bastard the Mangy Donkey,
Cloak of Camouflage, 112 Green Farthings, 17 Yuros, Several heavy rocks, Some ribs, saucepan.
Name: Whiz
Class: Level 3 Whiznificent Whiz Wiz(ard)
Status: +1 to lower leg defence. -1 to social interaction. +1 to balancing. Naked! +1 to gut wounds. +2 to defence for one turn.
Health: [HP: 40/85] |
Giant Rat’s Tail!Abilities: Red Carpet,
Shield I,
Gee, Mr. Whiz, You Sure Are Fast! Gee, Mr. Whiz, You Sure Are Fast II,
Obviously a Powerful Wizard,
It’ll Make You Blind!Inventory: Crossbow, Unlimited Quiver,
Raider’s Dress of Shin Protection, 37 Yuros,
Middling Mana Potion x1, Cutlass, Three daggers,
Minor Health Potion x2, +1 Bolt of Accuracy x4, +1 Bolt of Burning x3, +1 Bolt of Paralysis x2,
Carrying Serf x0 (not currently mounted), 12 Green Farthings.
Name: Medha Correo
Class: Level 3 Alchemist Curse Crafter
Status: +1 to gut defence. +1 to chest defence. -1 to non-stone-based social interaction.
Health: [HP: 36/85] |
Draconic Ribcage! Shiny Rock Face! Very Heavy Chest Bleeding!Skull Spider Health: [HP: 25/25]Abilities: Craft Curse Grenade,
Opportunistic Attack I,
Curse Crafter,
Curse of the Fool,
Wandering Asshole,
Curse of the Curse CrafterInventory: Dagger, Half a dress, 71 bandages,
Neckless of the Ribless, Dagger, Lock picking kit,
Iron Cuirass, 211 Yuros, Crossbow,
Brittle Jagged Groinbone Dagger of Good, 4 vials of human blood, 6 vials of kobold blood,
Grenade of the Fool x0, Serpent's Benediction plant x1, Faery-weed x1, A Shiny Stone, Bottle of Dragon Blood, a six foot plank of wood, a rune dagger,
Curse of Being Stepped Upon! Name: Gervedder Vietzo
Class: Level 3 Damaged Opportunistic Messenger
Status: +1 to gut and chest defence. +1 defence if moves.
Health: [HP: 85/85]Abilities: Just a Brainflesh Wound,
Nimble Feet,
This Messenger Delivers,
Make Way for the Messenger! Important,
Stop For DirectionsInventory: Crossbow, Unlimited Quiver, 2 bandages, 2 Yuros,
Iron Cuirass, Crossbow, Gerald the Mule, Two weeks rations and a bedroll,
Apprentice Herbalist's Manual,
Herbalist's Containers x5, Large Cork x1.
Name: Lady Foxglove Vainglorious the III
Class: Level 3 Glamorous Ravenhaired Crusader
Status: +1 to head, chest and groinbone defence.
Health: [HP: 85/85]Abilities: Ravena’s Ear,
Silent as a Raven’s Wing,
Opportunistic,
Honeyed Tongue,
Vain,
Self-RelianceInventory: Minor Health Potion x2, Crossbow, Unlimited Quiver,
Masterwork Helm,
Flying Warsquid,
Lance, Sword,
Mercenary Squidrider Uniform,
Masterwork Poledancing Pole,
chainmail lingerie, 34 Yuros, 10 bandages, Decent provisions (day) x4, Live eel x649, Red dragon-scale vest,
Curse Grenade of the Slimy Eel.
Name: Bukkar Crangrom
Class: Level 3 Sprayin' Ragin' Mage
Status: +1 to future gut damage!
Health: [HP: 40/85] |
The Vomiting!,
Extra Severed Guts!Abilities: Rage Flight,
Rage Lazors I,
Ass of the Flaming Foot I,
Lightning Fist I,
Always Looking For a Fight,
Always HungoverInventory: Sword of Severing! Crossbow, 400 Green Farthings,
Large Sealed Bling Barrel, Large Cork x1, Dragon Body Parts Covered in Bodily Fluids (quantity-small), pick.