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[lawastooshort]

((while you all get thrown into the thunderdome to battle giant badgers))

((This would be a good minigame, wouldn't it. It could be like fortress mode: you all get stripped naked and made to fight the in-training badgermilitia. Don't forget that Medha is on her own down the hole with a single kobold.))

[Harry Baldman]

"Excuse me, good sir, but might I ask what you mean by severe punishment? Could we, by any chance, walk away from this punishment physically unharmed?"

[lawastooshort]

The strange little lizarddog-rat makes a gurny face and a threatening, presumably, laugh.

”Eheheheh. Eheh. No. You couldn’t! Ehehehehe. Unless you like walking… and bleeding! Ehehehe!”

[Harry Baldman]

The strange little lizarddog-rat makes a gurny face and a threatening, presumably, laugh.

”Eheheheh. Eheh. No. You couldn’t! Ehehehehe. Unless you like walking… and bleeding! Ehehehe!”

"That's hardly something you should tell a person if you want them to come with you, is it not? Honestly, sir, you should hone your lying skills if you want to be a successful functionary. And lessen the whole creepy thing you've got going there. Be dignified and all that. Command respect."

[Chink]

((Can we try diplomacy? I believe a male kobold arguably counts as a humanoid male, and we could certainly remind how much more of nuisance we'll be if they don't let us kindly please leave the mountainside immediately.))

((I think they are more like rats, or dogs, or lizards-or some annoying yet adorable combination of all three. And we can't exactly leave the mountainside-we're here for the drum.

Anyway, I could certainly try and pull another trick from the RP bag...))

((Well, it's human shaped, at least, if I remember my kobolds correctly. If diplomacy doesn't work, that Curse Grenade of the Slimy Eel sounds useful. Also, what kind of eels are those in your inventory?))

[Toaster]

Tackov squints at the lead kobold.  He indicates the clothes he has acquired.

"I say, good sir!  It would be most unpleasant for everyone involved if you had to capture me naked, right?  I have my clothes right here- mind if I step behind this barrel and put them on?"

He waves the clothes around quite revealingly.


((Initiate backup plan))

[lawastooshort]

He waves the clothes around quite revealingly.

The kobold stares at Tackov with a strange look on his face. Almost... almost an admiring look, realises Tackov.

"Yes! Yes I would mind! Ehhehehehe! We kobolds are well known for our fondness for nudity: take one more step behind yon barrel and I will order my koboldmen to open fire! And that would be most unpleasant for some people involved! Ehehehe!"

He turns to Gervedder.

"Less creepy?! Eehehehe! I am an evil kobold - the creepy kind! Enough talk: lay down your weapons or face my creepy wrath!"

((Also, what kind of eels are those in your inventory?))

((Just your standard eel, really. The kind you can carry 700 of in a bag without being overencumbered. Not man-eating eels or anything.))

[Harry Baldman]

"Less creepy?! Eehehehe! I am an evil kobold - the creepy kind! Enough talk: lay down your weapons or face my creepy wrath!"

"What, you seriously self-identify as evil? Have you no self-respect, man? Don't you think that whatever you're doing is for the good of kobold society? Or are you possessed by evil spirits or something? What about the rest of you kobolds? Do you think you're evil as well?"

Ask, but be prepared to run and dodge if they open fire.

[lawastooshort]

"What? Shut up! Of course it's for the good of kobold society, we're gonna keep you away from it! Eejit!"

The kobold shouts over his shoulder.

"Don't you bloody talk to this oversized sophist! Fire!!"

[Harry Baldman]

"What? Shut up! Of course it's for the good of kobold society, we're gonna keep you away from it! Eejit!"

The kobold shouts over his shoulder.

"Don't you bloody talk to this oversized sophist! Fire!!"

"Sure, kobolds. Listen to the guy who goes out and says he's evil. Does that sound stupid to anyone else around here?"

[lawastooshort]

One particularly small kobold steps forward, with his finger raised.

"Er, can I speak? I quite like being evil! I kicked a kitten yesterday! But I also made a nice pot of porridge for my koboldling! Eheheheh!"

[Toaster]

"Sounds like you're rather conflicted on the whole 'good versus evil' thing then.  Have you ever tried being good?  Maybe you should be good instead of evil for a week or so and see which you like better."

[Harry Baldman]

"Instead of kicking kittens, try doing something more creative. Or maybe spend quality time with your family. There's a wealth of experience out there you're not able to enjoy simply because of adherence to evil, which, as a label, doesn't really give you any benefits at all. Why not accept the relative freedom of moral complexity instead?"

[Toaster]

Tackov mentally wonders if the kobolds are equipped for any kind of complexity.

[Errol]

Meanwhile, Medha.

"..."

"......"

"OH AREN'T YOU JUST THE CUTEST WIDDLE THING!"

GLOMP MODE ENGAGED.