Turn Thirty FiveRun at Zombie 1, trip it up as well.
Attack the nearest randomised target (who happens to be Gervedder)!
Attack the nearest randomised target (who happens to be Gervedder)!
In the endless trundle around the first layer of dungeons in the Temple of Sef, Gervedder Vietzo and two zombies run at each other – one in dramatic slow motion and two in literal slow motion, shufflingly winning initiative as they stumble towards the Messenger and
…bite him hard in the chest!
Blood pours all over the place as Gervedder sticks his leg out and
…sends one of his attackers crashing to the ground.
Wound Acquired: Gervedder Vietzo:
Heavy Chest Bleeding!Double Speed using Whiz I, grab my arm, stick it back into its socket, consume Billy's potion, and consume my Medium Health Potion.
Travelling at the speed of a blur, the blood spouting from Whiz’s severed arm stump doesn’t even have time to finish falling to the ground before the speed wizard has dashed back down the corridor past first his comrades, then his foes, picked his severed arm up off the ground, and darted back up the corridor to comparative safety.
…His medical technique of ramming his severed arm in the exposed socket doesn’t entirely work, and he temporarily passes out from the pain!
He’s still feeling quite woozy as he drops the severed arm, fishes about in his dress for a pair of potions, and downs them in quick succession.
Blood stops squirting out of his horrendous wound and he feels a lot better, and then suddenly an enormous rat’s tail grows out of his backside!
Status Acquired: Whiz:
Woozy!Mutation Acquired: Whiz:
Giant Rat’s Tail!Action: Troglodyte zombie crotch kick!
”Bam! Yeah! In the crotch! Take that, er… ugly… crotchless… troglodyte?””Good gods, Lady Foxglove. Even to an undead fiend, that seems a little excessive?””Hurrr! Yeah! Hiiiiiiiya! Did you see his crotch come apart! Yeah!”…Lady Foxglove Vainglorious III dances over the fallen burning zombie corpse to the next foe, not even stopping to wipe severed troglodyte zombie crotch blood off her boots, or her legs, or her clothes, or her face, or the walls, or her slightly alarmed companions.
Wound Acquired: Troglodyte Zombie:
Severed Crotch!Try again! With more swearing!
”Feckfeckinarsebiscuitfeckfeckfeckfeckfeckfeckf-arrrrrrrrrrrg that’s better. Oh gosh. Yes. Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh gods I almost feel as if I could wal-karggggg maybe not yet gngggngggg! Strewth.”…Tackov successfully straightens his mangled legs!
He’s still probably going to have to drag himself about on the floor with his arms for at least a day before they get better though.
Decide that this room is even boring-er than the last, get back in and backstab an undead sucker.
…Emoing in from the other dull room, Medha comes face to… back with some undead sucker, and boredly and ineffectually stabs it a bit in the back.
She huffs.
It’s so unfair.
Grab the Troglodyte zombie and rageyell while vomiting down its throat.
Then try to crush its skull with my hands.
((edited to next nearest non-dead-again enemy))
”Hrurrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrhhh!” yells Bukkar, grabbing the nearest zombie and
…dry-retching as hard as he can in its face until
…the zombie grows bored and ineffectually counterattacks with a sharp elbow jab to his own cheek, opening itself up in turn to
…an entirely incompetent skull-crush special move from the rage mage!
The two opponents face off in a spectacle of non-lethal martial arts!
((second round of quick fight death combat initiated because otherwise we’ll be in the same corner of corridor for another fortnight whilst you finish off two stubborn but not that deadly zombies now that the troglodyte zombie is gone))
QUICK FIGHT DEATH COMBAT MODE INITIATED!In the northern end of the Corridor of Death: Team One! The Righteous Tyrants of Doom: Tackov Cedtry, Lady Foxglove Vainglorious III, and Gervedder Vietzo!
And their opponent:
Zombie Number One!
And in the corner of the Corridor of Death: Team Two! In initiative order: Whiz the Tailed Wizard, Medha the Bereft of Rib, and Bukkar Crangrom the Magin’ Rage!
And their opponent:
Zombie Number Two!
FIGHT!Crawling forth on his elbows, Tackov the Legless inches forwards, slumps to his chest,
…and punches right between the zombie’s feet!
Nearly managing to outdo his uselessness but scoring lower due to the wizard’s mangled legs handicap,
…Lady Foxglove gives the zombie a gentle poke in the groin with her blood-smeared boot!
Finally Gervedder the Messenger of Doom steps forward, and
…trips the zombie up again!
But!
What’s this!
Zombie number one tries to get to his feet to gnaw on Lady Foxglove’s brains and slips on the blood spattered all over the floor!
…He impales his skull on Lady F’s knee!
She disdainfully shakes him off onto the floor. He doesn’t move.
FIGHT!Further down the corridor, Whiz the Wizard is too emotionally vulnerable about his new tail mutation situation to muster his full concentration and
…only just about remembers to draw his crossbow. He stands there for a few seconds, wondering how to operate it with a missing arm!
Just as he decides that he can probably use his teeth, Medha the Emo Curse Crafter When She Can Be Bothered decides that penetrating the zombie’s ugly horrible flesh might be too much effort,
…and instead penetrates the air next to it!
Almost incontinent with rage, Bukkar
…snatches Whiz’s severed arm off the unfortunate wizard and proceeds to beat the zombie back to death with it! The arm looks mangled and the blood is everywhere!
”Huuurah!” cries Bukkar, proffering the palm of his cleaner hand to his comrades,
”Zombie Destruction High Five, Team! Yeah! Hgnaaarrhr!”… … … … … …
The team move slowly on into the next room, Medha leading the way and explaining that this room is really boring man, I wish I’d never even come here, I don’t know why I hang out with you guys, and despite her moaning the six adventurers follow the signs in the room that point to the exit, and come to a flight of stairs leading down into the darkness.
They look at each other in the silence, realising that they have come to a crossroads of sorts. Do they push on, and down, into what may be the very heart of darkness? Or do they leave the evil crypt for another day, and pursue the only obvious lead they have so far gained?
”Wait, what’s the fecking point anyway?” mumbles Medha.
”Why are we even here?””What, you mean here here, here in the plane of Istria, or just here in a more general existential sense? Because if that’s what you mean I’m not really sure this is the time or place. Maybe when we get back and have had a few at the inn?””Oh, don’t bother with mopeface… We’re here to go steal a mandolin off some filthy kobolds, and I’ve got us a free pass to do it!””Or we could look for criminals who might not even be here in this undead filled booby-trapped dungeon that could go down for miles and miles? I could be onto something you know.””I… I suppose you could…”Right – updated the OP to include
Overdrive Mode!Apologies for the delay – been pressed for time and I can normally get an update for my other game done in half the time that it takes for this.
Current Players:Name: Tackov Cedtry
Class: Level 2 Wind Mage
Status: -1 to strength! -2 to movement! -1 to dodging! -1 to combat!
Health: [HP: 55/55] |
Poisoned Buttock!! |
The Vomiting! |
Broken Legs!Abilities: Magical Typhoon I,
Wind Blast I,
Wind Step I,
Squishy,
Sissy Slap FightInventory: Minor Mana Potion x1,
Scroll of Beginner’s Fireball x1, 3 Yuros, one memorised use of:
Gee, Mr. Whiz, You Sure Are Fast! Name: Whiz
Class: Level 2 Whiz Wiz(ard)
Status: -1 to lower leg damage. -1 to melee and arms. -1 to social interaction.
Health: [HP: 80/80] |
Severed Right Arm! |
Woozy! |
Giant Rat’s Tail!Abilities: Shield I,
Gee, Mr. Whiz, You Sure Are Fast! Gee, Mr. Whiz, You Sure Are Fast II,
Obviously a Powerful Wizard,
It’ll Make You Blind!Inventory: Crossbow, Unlimited Quiver,
Raider’s Dress of Shin Protection, 37 Yuros, Fancy Clothes,
Scroll of Beginner’s Fireball x2,
Middling Health Potion x1,
Middling Mana Potion x1, Cutlass, Three normal quivers, Three crossbows, Three daggers,
Minor Health Potion x4, +1 Bolt of Accuracy x5, +1 Bolt of Burning x5, +1 Bolt of Paralysis x2,
Middling Health Potion x1 x1.
Name: Medha Correo
Class: Level 2 Curse Crafter
Status: -1 to gut damage. +1 to chest damage, -1 to dodge, -1 to charisma style rolls.
Health: [HP: 80/80] |
Severed Rib! |
Severed Rib! |
Broken Guts!Abilities: Opportunistic Attack,
Bad Luck Curse,
Curse of the Fool,
Wandering Asshole,
Curse of the Curse CrafterInventory: Dagger, Half a dress, 78 bandages,
Neckless of the Ribless, Coffee (half a jug), Small bottle of Mage blood, Dagger, Lock picking kit,
Iron Cuirass, unlit torch, 400 Green Farthings, 1
Stinking Eejit cheese, Bones.
Name: Gervedder Vietzo
Class: Level 2 Opportunistic Messenger
Status: -1 to gut/chest damage.
Health: [HP: 75/80] |
Heavy Chest Bleeding!Abilities: Nimble Feet,
This Messenger Delivers,
Make Way for the Messenger! Important,
Stop For DirectionsInventory: Crossbow, Unlimited Quiver, 10 bandages, 7 Yuros,
Iron Cuirass.
Name: Lady Foxglove Vainglorious the III
Class: Level 2 Ravenhaired Crusader
Status: Super-presentable!
Health: [HP: 80/80]Abilities: Silent as a Raven’s Wing,
Opportunistic,
Honeyed Tongue,
Vain,
Self-RelianceInventory: Minor Health Potion x1, Crossbow, Unlimited Quiver, 2 Yuros.
Name: Bukkar Crangrom
Class: Level 2 Ragin' Mage
Status: Health: [HP:55/80] |
Bleeding Toes! |
Heavy Bleeding! |
The Vomiting!Abilities: Rage Lazors I,
Ass of the Flaming Foot I,
Lightning Fist I,
Always Looking For a Fight,
Always Hungover Inventory: Minor Health Potion x1, 2 Yuros.