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[Loud Whispers]

Have you gone stark raving mad with joy?

Felt that SATISFACTION at something unexpected? Or something entirely GRAND, cascading into utter completion?

Well, now there's a thread for that.

In my Fort I have plenty of copper and silver from lots of digging. Deciding to put all of that to the use I started setting up row upon row of silver and copper menacing spikes as weapon traps along the walls.
Progress has been slow to say, but one wall face was completed and sealed up.
The idea was that diplomats would be able to see them, the rows upon rows of spikes (as would adventurers trying to climb the walls!). But to the untrained eye, they were simply plain walls stretching across the horizon - inviting, homely.

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

And to the birds that sought to perch - SPIKES!

This was doubly surprising. They were zombie ravens trying to eat that poor child Atis Phrasecobalt as she was sealed outside the walls running across the spikes.
Every single zombie raven was taken out by the spikes. I wasn't even aware they had entered the map until 5 combat reports of SPIKES SPIKING SPIKY THINGS (because they got spiked).
GLORIOUS SPIKES!
Anyone who has dealt with the flying menace will know too the joy it is to see such persistent murderers dispatched so quickly, all the while saving one child twice.

So Bay12, what in your Fort has garnered SATISFACTION on this wonderful day?

[Catsup]

i accidentally left the goblin poking chamber on repeat one time and forgot about it for quite some time. To my surprise, when i returned, the goblin was still alive, but barely. The survival rate of my torture chambers is very low, around 20% if i micro-manage it well so i have very limited trophies to show off in my dwarves' dining hall. Supply is limited too since i execute most goblins instantly by grinding them to bits for their bones, and only get to send their elites, weapon masters, and leaders to the poking chamber.

Man what a pleasant surprise that was, the goblin must have been broken in every body part, yet didnt bleed out and had a large paragraph of grey parts in her description (i think it was likely that this particular goblin had very high recuperation). Was my best trophy so far in that fort, and the third to survive the preparation process.

[Id Utalrisen]

i accidentally left the goblin poking chamber on repeat one time and forgot about it for quite some time. To my surprise, when i returned, the goblin was still alive, but barely. The survival rate of my torture chambers is very low

Thank god enemies can't level up, or he'd probably be a legendary everything, and probably murder everyone in your fort, dying or not.

[itg]

I built my current fortress around a huge open-air pit which extends down to just above the magma sea (which is unfortunately only about 30 levels deep). My fortress defense consists of a retracting bridge path over the pit which circles the fortress three times on three separate levels before connecting to the primary entrance. The first time I managed to simultaneously gib ~200 zombies, it was... magical. Like Zombie fourth of July.

Here's a screenshot, taken after Goblin Fourth of July, I think:

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

[Skorpion]

I found a method of solving the Raven Problem. Just set up weapon traps full of large, serrated steel disks, and let them be blendered.

[Catsup]

i accidentally left the goblin poking chamber on repeat one time and forgot about it for quite some time. To my surprise, when i returned, the goblin was still alive, but barely. The survival rate of my torture chambers is very low

Thank god enemies can't level up, or he'd probably be a legendary everything, and probably murder everyone in your fort, dying or not.

the poking chamber is 1x1 though, so there is no room for the goblin to dodge around. It consists of 1 glass menacing spike linked to a repeating lever pulled by dwarves and the only way out is through cage traps.


and @ itg, thats an impressive pit, but what will you do if goblins come mounted on mounts that disable bridges?

[MrKitten]

I too take great satisfaction in weapon traps.  I like to load up 10 spiked balls for that gratifying 30 whacks of hilarity.  So along comes a dragon yesterday ready to thrash and burn.  She toddles right into a trap with 5 glass balls and 5 iron balls and manages to wobble out with all four legs broken.  So my whole fort is in lockdown waiting for this dragon to bleed out, but it seems to have stopped with the blood loss.  I don't really want to wait for starvation, but I don't want to risk losing my whole platoon, so I decide to make a squad of one with my least favorite speardwarf who we'll call Urist McWaitforit.  He runs up and after a few second of watching blood spray around the map I go in for a detailed look of the fight.  "Ooh.  He blocked a few fire blasts.  Good.  And I see a nice cloud of blue fight text."  But... the idiot forgot his spear. So it's a huge line of this beardy little twit kicking punching and biting a downed dragon while he skillfully deflects dragonfire blasts like they were nothing.  Finally after maybe a month of fighting a bite opens an artery, and I guess the dragon bled out.  Dwarves are savage and vicious little monsters

[Urist Mc Dwarf]

Three goblins fell into my badger pit. One poorunlucky!!FUN!! fellow lost every limb except for his right foot? and was crawling around in agony while the badgers finished off the other twoo until he bled out. i also built a mincer. twelve weapon traps with ten masterwork steel disks each. A goblin and a troll wandered in. The goblin was turned into fine spray. The troll was turned into chunky salsa.

[CognitiveDissonance]

...The troll was turned into chunky salsa.

Ugh. Ew.

What gives me great satisfaction is, having set all the pieces on the table, leaning back and watching the fortress run itself. Safe from invasions, safe from starvation, with a happy populace. I'm a bit boring this way.

I absolutely loved weapon traps, until I started finding them unsportsmanlike. They are just so good!

[Catsup]

after i tore down the depot and relieved the elf merchants of their goods i gleefully watched as they tried to leave, only to be chased by the horse corpses that were roaming my map. Stupid elves kept trying to leave from one side of the map, and that side was were the horse corpses were meandering. One horse managed to chase down and kill one of their wagon animals (luckily in the non-evil part of the map) which resulted in free meat and to my surprise, bins of cloth (apparently the elves managed to load some of their goods before the depot was deconstructed). Fun times.

[itg]

i accidentally left the goblin poking chamber on repeat one time and forgot about it for quite some time. To my surprise, when i returned, the goblin was still alive, but barely. The survival rate of my torture chambers is very low

Thank god enemies can't level up, or he'd probably be a legendary everything, and probably murder everyone in your fort, dying or not.

the poking chamber is 1x1 though, so there is no room for the goblin to dodge around. It consists of 1 glass menacing spike linked to a repeating lever pulled by dwarves and the only way out is through cage traps.


and @ itg, thats an impressive pit, but what will you do if goblins come mounted on mounts that disable bridges?

They don't. I think the zombies killed the goblin master in one of the early years. Love those concurrent sieges. Of course, if the goblins did bring such mounts, I'd have to stand and fight. I've got a marksdwarf pillbox and a squad of legendary miners. They'd probably do ok.

[Loud Whispers]

Was my best trophy so far in that fort, and the third to survive the preparation process.

Preparation? For what?!

That right there is actually horrifying. Poor goblins. They're not even allowed to die of old age.

[Catsup]

Preparation? For what?!

That right there is actually horrifying. Poor goblins. They're not even allowed to die of old age.

for my collection of horribly tortured goblin leaders in my dinning room. Im trying to get a collection of one of each type of goblin weapon master, including their civilization leaders.

[Werehuman]

Preparation? For what?!

That right there is actually horrifying. Poor goblins. They're not even allowed to die of old age.

for my collection of horribly tortured goblin leaders in my dinning room. Im trying to get a collection of one of each type of goblin weapon master, including their civilization leaders.

That is really horrific right there. Torturing them, just enough so they are miserable, not enough so they die, and then putting them on display in your dining room. The thing that made me happy today is when my lone miner killed nearly a whole siege by himself, unarmored. He got outnumbered though, but the win is still evident.

[Loud Whispers]

Well, this is disturbing.

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

From left to right in ascending zlvls, a section of a particular tunnel.

What's disturbing is the total lack of any way to reach the parts that the Dorfs have dug out.

Adventurers and diplomats will wander the world to see this.

'BEYOND THESE WALLS LIES THE MYSTERIOUS TUNNEL OF SILENTTHUNDERS, SHAPED FROM THE GROUNDS THEMSELVES! IT IS SAID THE STONES THERE CRUMBLED INTO STAIRS OUT OF SHEER RESPECT FOR THE DWARVES!'
'That sounds interesting. Can we see them?'
'NOOOO YOOOOU MAAAAY NOT.'
'Why not?!'
'WEEEE DOON'T KNOOW HOW TO GET INSIDE THEEEM, IT IS WHY THEY ARE MYSTERIOUUS!'
'How in Avetho's name do you know they even exist then?'
[Confused utterances are elicited at such a stupid question].



My Dwarves know a thing or two about making rationality cry.
Sometimes my Dwarves are scary .-.