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[gimlet]

For your SAD-like effects, you can TRY using a lightbox.  I built a poor-man's lightbox by plugging light sockets into power strips I mounted on a board, and putting 100-w equivalent CFL bulbs into each socket.  (By "light sockets" I mean the ones that plug directly into an outlet, like these: http://www.homedepot.com/p/Leviton-White-Outlet-to-Socket-Light-Plug-R52-00061-00W/100170446 ).  I could fit 3 per power strip, I had to skip one outlet between sockets, and I used 3 power strips for a total of 9 bulbs - that's less than 300 watts total  so you should be able to plug it in anywhere.   "full spectrum" lights are nice but pricy, I just used a combination of 2700K ("soft white") and 5300K ("daylight").

Let that blast on you for a half hour or hour when you get up - to maximize my time with it I put it on the kitchen table so I'd have the whole time making and eating breakfast in front of it, then if I had any spare time I'd sit and read the paper or something.   It definitely seemed to help.  Also see if you can increase the lighting where you work - even if you have to bring in some battery powered LED lights or something - especially when you're working at night, low light can really be depressing.

Make SURE you're eating good meals too, and not just sugary junk - breakfast should be something like eggs or oatmeal plus fruit and nuts, maybe with some milk.  Lots of protein, complex carbohydrates, a little fat, and as little sugar as possible.   I felt a lot better during the day once I got into a groove of eating decently, and not grabbing donuts and coffee on the way because I was in a rush.

Good luck, working at night is painful enough, on top of all the other stuff you have goin on...

[Scelly9]

You sounded like such a spambot in the first half of that post. They you just sounded a bit crazy.

[GiglameshDespair]

I'm going to come clean, I waffled around several days ago and just started talking to her again, and figured if I'm not going to commit to one try and commit to the other, so I've just tried to be her best friend completely like normal. Well... now I feel like this. And I havent been as healthy or composed. I think a road to a better life is not with her.

Did you talk to her physically or through a program? If through a program, block her or delete it entirely. As you've said and we've told you, being around her is not a good thing. It'll suck being alone for a while, but you'll adapt, even if it hurts at first. You need to commit to not talking her. We can't help with that: only you can do it in the end. And you can.

[zehive]

Frick

[Darkmere]

So, you're in the same place where this all started, where she's treating you like shit and you're still in the position of needing to cut her out completely and move on. She's obviously giving you the run-around, so fuck it. You're still the only one who can fix this, there's not much more to be said that hasn't been already.

[zehive]

Hmmmm delicious

[Vector]

The reason why it's necessary is that it's not a punitive measure, it's a protective measure.

[zehive]

Nah

[Darkmere]

If she gave a damn she would have actually responded to your concerns like a human being, because that's what adults do. Instead, she blew you off and did everything possible to change the subject, which is what children do when they piss the bed. Now you're just dragging the whole thing out, trying to passive-aggressively punish her for being with another guy, which isn't going to change her mind. Also, you're still placing all the power directly on her. If you don't take action, maybe she'll feel bad, maybe she'll visit, maybe she'll be something that she isn't. Maybe she'll fix it for you. Saying that blocking her is immature is another defense mechanism to keep yourself from taking the control of the situation that she's adamantly refusing to give.

And yet again, when you could be doing something for YOU, to make YOU feel better, you're still mired in the same shit, defining everything via her, wasting more energy and time on her, while she toys with you and sleeps with him (or whatever).

[zehive]

Well well well

[Darkmere]

Ah, that sank in a bit better than the first time you typed it out. I could have sworn you'd already said things to that effect before?

Either way, It's way late for me, I'll have to check back tomorrow later today. ugh.

[GiglameshDespair]

Quite frankly, it's not to punish her, it's just that you be friends with her sucks. She's not a good friend. She might have been in the past, but the past is the past. That's over. You're still allowing her the control, which is what made you unhappy in the first place! You're telling yourself it's immature to block her to avoid doing it, but you're not doing it to punish her, you'd be doing it to help yourself.

You still want to be friends with her. I think that's a bad idea.Each time you talk to her, you end up 'mired in her bullshit'. Sometimes you gotta cut it off at the source, and she is definitely the source of your woes. You still have facebook, so delete her. If you really have to, add her again in a month. Preferably, don't.

[geronimo]

I return and realise things have not panned out the other guys' way, strange huh......yeah, I was totally wrong *sarcasm*

[geronimo]

If she gave a damn she would have actually responded to your concerns like a human being, because that's what adults do. Instead, she blew you off and did everything possible to change the subject, which is what children do when they piss the bed. Now you're just dragging the whole thing out, trying to passive-aggressively punish her for being with another guy, which isn't going to change her mind. Also, you're still placing all the power directly on her. If you don't take action, maybe she'll feel bad, maybe she'll visit, maybe she'll be something that she isn't. Maybe she'll fix it for you. Saying that blocking her is immature is another defense mechanism to keep yourself from taking the control of the situation that she's adamantly refusing to give.

And yet again, when you could be doing something for YOU, to make YOU feel better, you're still mired in the same shit, defining everything via her, wasting more energy and time on her, while she toys with you and sleeps with him (or whatever).

I'm not trying to passively aggressively punish her for being with another guy, I'm clearly stating that I've done everything I could to try and talk about it like an adult and rationally and she always takes the path or avoidance and internalizing my problems. Thats why I am not speaking to her, because now when I decided 'well okay fine she seems to want to talk to me and i want to talk to her w/e' its become stupid and yeah I'm mired in her bullshit again. So she's hurting me because I'm not taking charge, well I feel like I took charge tonight and told her whats what and how it is and what I won't be putting up with anymore, and she clearly knows that because of what she's done our friendship and the entire concept of it will be over if she doesn't take some fucking steps to be an adult and be decent and talk to me and show she cares even half as much as I do, because as is I care way more than her, clearly, and all its doing is hurting me and all she's doing is hurting me. Tonight I basically said I'm not putting up with it anymore, heres my problems, heres whats bothering me, heres whats wrong. I am not speaking to you until you approach me to talk about it, and then I just have her hidden on facebook IM and removed from skype. I just don't want to delete her from facebook and effectively cut off her only avenue of actually attempting to fix it herself. I have wasted too much time trying to fix a situation entirely out of my control, 2+2 is 4, as much as I wish it was 5 it isn't, and that is up to her, not me.

I'm taking action by telling her what I am doing unless she grows up about this situation, I've made my mind up and I let her know and I let her know why and as I've detailed too many times I've told her that if we continue to be anything depends entirely on her, because it just sort of does. In the meantime I'm considering our friendship just nonexistant, and though I didn't say that, what I said amounts to that. And even if she does speak to me about it or comes to talk to me, thats no guarantee. Because it might just end as angry shouting and then there really will be reason to block her, but she needs to come speak to me when she genuinely wants me back in her life, and then I'll see after speaking to her if I really want her back in mine.

I was trying to say it nicer earlier but your girl is an idiot. So I highly doubt expecting her to think the way you want her to by that method won't work in this millenia

[Shakerag]

I'm not trying to passively aggressively punish her for being with another guy, I'm clearly stating that I've done everything I could to try and talk about it like an adult and rationally and she always takes the path or avoidance and internalizing my problems. Thats why I am not speaking to her, because now when I decided 'well okay fine she seems to want to talk to me and i want to talk to her w/e' its become stupid and yeah I'm mired in her bullshit again. So she's hurting me because I'm not taking charge, well I feel like I took charge tonight and told her whats what and how it is and what I won't be putting up with anymore, and she clearly knows that because of what she's done our friendship and the entire concept of it will be over if she doesn't take some fucking steps to be an adult and be decent and talk to me and show she cares even half as much as I do, because as is I care way more than her, clearly, and all its doing is hurting me and all she's doing is hurting me. Tonight I basically said I'm not putting up with it anymore, heres my problems, heres whats bothering me, heres whats wrong. I am not speaking to you until you approach me to talk about it, and then I just have her hidden on facebook IM and removed from skype. I just don't want to delete her from facebook and effectively cut off her only avenue of actually attempting to fix it herself. I have wasted too much time trying to fix a situation entirely out of my control, 2+2 is 4, as much as I wish it was 5 it isn't, and that is up to her, not me.

I'm taking action by telling her what I am doing unless she grows up about this situation, I've made my mind up and I let her know and I let her know why and as I've detailed too many times I've told her that if we continue to be anything depends entirely on her, because it just sort of does. In the meantime I'm considering our friendship just nonexistant, and though I didn't say that, what I said amounts to that. And even if she does speak to me about it or comes to talk to me, thats no guarantee. Because it might just end as angry shouting and then there really will be reason to block her, but she needs to come speak to me when she genuinely wants me back in her life, and then I'll see after speaking to her if I really want her back in mine.

I support this course of action.  It's obvious you can't just drop her out of your life like everyone else is telling you to do.  You need some kind of resolution.  You need to know "is she just taking a temporary leave of her senses?" or "is she really playing me for a fool?".  And I think not knowing will gnaw at you forever and certainly not do you any good.