Huzzah! Now go spread the medicine throughout the masses!
After extricating yourself away from Stabby McBlindDealer, you return to your overturned cart to offer "medicine" to the masses.
Unfortunately, even though it's free, no one here is interesting in what you're selling. It's 6 AM, so the sort of people who are up and about at this time aren't really interested in "medicine", or, if they are, they aren't interested in taking it from a crazy man out on the main road where all kinds of guards are stationed.
Speaking of guards, one of them approaches you.
"Excuse me, sir, but may I ask what you have in that bag of yours?"
... I could use a drink. Find a less shady quest and apologize to Albrecht.
All this burning a dude to death has made you thirsty.
On your way back to the inn, you overhear an old man in a cloak saying something to a chimpmunk.
"...can't give it to you all by your lonesome. Come back to me once you've got five to seven other companions with ya, and I'll direct ya to the Fungeon of Broom."
(*Examines the entrails of a bird*) "FUS RO DAH!" shouts your sword, launching some nearby cabbages into the sky.
You wonder why you are so proficient with a sword, then realize it is because you are playing Link, who traditionally wields a sword. Plus, the name of the game you're playing is Skyrim Sword.
Go whack some bushes and pots with sword, buy everything from the sword with found rupees, and go to Ganondorf's castle. If heavy obstacles are not in place, Go to Ganon's inner sanctum and have sword shout at him.
You do some epic questing, clearing dungeons, solving puzzles, picking up cool items in the middle of the dungeons that conveniently allow you to bypass many of the problems you had in said dungeons, picking up a shit-ton more loot than you can possibly sell, sneak attacking dudes with your bow, collecting dragon shouts. Once you collect all the Macguffins and become Dragon of the Realm, you go to Ganondorf's castle to face him in his inner sanctum.
There, you have an epic battle of sword-against-magic, culminating in your final strike, where you sword shout him into a million little pieces.
He is defeated, and you head to the next room to go see Princess Zelda, when the million little pieces of Ganondorf form into spiders and swarm over you. You suddenly wake up, covered in ants.
Search for and retrieve cat by any means necessary.
The lady gives you his description, and you start asking around if anyone has seen him.
You search for a half hour with no luck, until you spot him, there in the street: White fur with black spots on his back, head, and the tip of his tail, five-foot-nine and wearing red mittens.
"Mittens!" You say.
He turns around.
"Oh, gods, she sent someone looking for me? Listen, pal, do me a favor and tell the old lady you found me dead. Like, I was run over a carriage or something," he says in a Brookyln-sounding accent.