Print

Please login or register.
1 Hour 1 Day 1 Week 1 Month Forever
Login with username, password and session length

[Donuts]

So, I've had problems with my life for about 2, maybe 3 years now. Everything's really went down the shitter. I've got no personal friends, and I feel my family is just horrible. Grandmother is pretty much just evil, and would literally LAUGH and shit if I would ever be sad in any way. Mother feels like she's deliberately trying to ruin my life. Haven't seen my father for a year, almost 2. My brother's really the only cool person in my family, even though he's annoying the hell out of me sometimes. School's been hit too, as the teachers got lockout'd. This also means I don't have any chance to go get new friends, and I'm the least social person I've ever known. For some reason I can't eat much, even though most people my age would clear up the plate twice, maybe thrice. Most of my time I just sit at home, sometimes watch a movie and quit halfway through, sit here at the PC, or just try to take a nap (and fail horribly). I generally can't even fall asleep, sometimes staying awake to about 1 in the morning. I'm that 'gifted' guy. I'm asking you on B12 on help with this, and I've tried everything I can think of.

[Foamybeard]

Sounds like you have situational depression due to your homelife, and as such it is giving you insomnia.

Hell, it sounds like you might have clinical depression. I can't know for a fact, however. Give us more details so we can help?

[Tomcost]

I'm not good at this, but I think that you should try a kind of rewarding activity, be it a hobbie, or a sport. It doesn't have to be a kind of competitive ability, just something in what you can get better to feel better for yourself. Think about your capacities. As you posted in a forum of such a comlicated game as Dwarf Fortress, at least you are pacient enough to learn it. Have you thought about gardening, a kind of martial art, or something simmilar?

[Donuts]

Sounds like you have situational depression due to your homelife, and as such it is giving you insomnia.

Hell, it sounds like you might have clinical depression. I can't know for a fact, however. Give us more details so we can help?

I can't even get around because I throw up whenever I take the bus, and cars are almost as bad. All I can think of right now.
Edit: Also, I've known a psychiatrist, but couldn't he really help.

I'm not good at this, but I think that you should try a kind of rewarding activity, be it a hobbie, or a sport. It doesn't have to be a kind of competitive ability, just something in what you can get better to feel better for yourself. Think about your capacities. As you posted in a forum of such a comlicated game as Dwarf Fortress, at least you are pacient enough to learn it. Have you thought about gardening, a kind of martial art, or something simmilar?

I've tried to get into martial arts a bit, and I've went to swimming for a year until I just really couldn't anymore. I'm a weakling, not much fits my personality w/e.

[Tomcost]

Last year, when I was 16, my wheght was about 44 kilos (it was really low, even for someone whose height doesn't reach 1.60 meters). I was quite weak, but I keep practicing my normal activities (which, by coincidence, are swimming and Taekwon-do). I made a lot of progress in my lung capacity (or watever way you use to say the resistance to getting tired you have), and I could swim 50 meters underwater without breathing. I also increased a rank in Taekwon-do.

Just do something that you feel you like, you don't need more than that.

[Vector]

a. Walking
b. Meditation
c. Don't focus on external standards of success, or end-game goals.  Focus on "how can I make my situation a tiny bit better?"  This, more than anything else, has changed my life.

[weenog]

Maybe you need something more meaningful in your life.  It sounds like the things you do, and the things you want to do, are all pretty superficial.  Not judging here, it happens to a lot of people, me included.  Unfortunately, when nothing you do or experience really matters, it can be difficult to self-motivate, and to take pleasure or even notice when the small things go right.  Perhaps the solution is to get involved in something that's important to you, and where your action or inaction makes a significant impact.

I don't mean to suggest you put yourself into a position where you will quite literally die if you don't get your act together (although that certainly got me out of my own rut), but perhaps you could volunteer your time to a cause you feel strongly about, or teach yourself a new skill that you think will be important to your quality of life in the future, or take care of an abused animal, something like that.  Find something that you care about and that you can do, something for which it doesn't matter what your crappy family thinks, whether the teachers are working, or how many friends you make for doing it, all that matters is your own performance and the results... then get out and do it.  Do it so hard and persistently that you end up every day banged up, sore, and completely exhausted.  If nothing else it should start you eating and sleeping more effectively.  You'll have to, just to recover the energy you're expending to whatever it is you're doing.

[Sigulbard]

Eat healthier - when your body is healthy and clean, you feel better (many people start eating what they like to call 'comfort foods' when they feel down, hence they fatten themselves and develop unhealthy habits; you, however, don't seem to have that tendency, since you barely eat). Are you on a good diet at the moment? Replace foods or snacks that you commonly eat with better alternatives. Also, when you restrain yourself from unhealthy foods, replace the phrase "I can't have this." to "I don't need or really want this, here's why..., instead I could have..."

Exercise - exercising gets your mind off of things. Try going jogging or doing something light first, since you're not at your peak physical condition (I like boxing). Some guy mentioned meditation, but in my opinion it's kind of boring. I mean, sure, it supposedly cleanses your mind and helps you bring clarity into your life, but exercise can do that and also improve your fitness. Again, a body that is healthy, feels healthy.

One more thing. I'm not sure if there's a point in sharing this, but do whatever you want with it:
Every morning or evening, when you're in the bathroom or whatever, look at yourself in the mirror, in the eyes, and say "I am exactly who I want to be." then keep the gaze for 30 seconds as your brain processes the information. Immediately you might think of counter arguments to that statement saying something like "No, that's not true, I am not happy with myself because of *this* and *this*," but repeat the process for weeks and you'll notice a change in your behavior. Your confidence and self-esteem will improve.