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Author Topic: Additional CIA japes [DPRK Thread]  (Read 552317 times)

Loud Whispers

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    • I APPLAUD YOU SIRRAH

Psh, the Han couldn't even remove rebel.
Then I'll guess they'll just be Han Solo

MetalSlimeHunt

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Speaking of KOREA, President KIM JONG-UN has plans to make STAR KOREA real. According to the JUCHE newspaper SERVICE TO THE STATE, the ONE AND ONLY KOREAN government wants to spend multiple TRILLIONS on a research program that will not only result in the development of a 'patriotic' programming language, but by 2035, is also meant to provide a functional teleportation system.

THE SUCCESS OF THIS PROGRAM IS ASSURED BY THE SCIENTIFIC RESEARCH OF KIM JONG-UN

Scientists at the university of PYONGYANG succeeded last year in teleporting information carrying particles over a distance of INTO THE IMPERIALIST AMERICAN HEART OF DARKNESS. This technology could be used in the future to send data that canDESTROY IMPERIALIST WARMAKING CAPACITY AND BRING PEACE TO THE WORLD.

GREAT GENERAL KIM JONG-UN are also operating in that field. But insofar, the announcement of the project mostly met with PATRIOTIC SUPPORT FROM THE ENLIGHTENED WORKING CLASS OF KOREA.
"37 million IMPERIALISTS still have a toilet cabin STOLEN FROM THE WORKING CLASS out in the backyard. And the government wants to spend 10 billion WON on teleportation? IT IS ONLY RATIONAL"

http://www.volkskrant.nl/wetenschap/-rusland-investeert-miljarden-in-teleportatiesysteem~a4326883/

i will not be outplayed, I'm still relevent, DRPK thread is stll rellevent!
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SirQuiamus

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As of now, no-one but IMMORTAL GREAT LEADER KIM IL-SUNG and IMMORTAL DEAR GENERAL KIM YONG-IL possess the ability to USE WARP at will, but thanks to the UNPARALLELED SCIENTIFIC GENIUS OF SUPREME LEADER KIM JONG-UN, by 2035 each and every soldier of the KOREAN PEOPLE'S ARMY OF THE DEMOCRATIC PEOPLE'S REPUBLIC OF KOREA will have the ability to USE WARP in order to DESTROY AMERICAN IMPERIALISM AND LIBERATE THE WORKERS OF THE WORLD.
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ChairmanPoo

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....Pyongyang has an university?
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TheBiggerFish

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That's a good question.
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MetalSlimeHunt

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TheBiggerFish

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Uh-huh.
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Sergarr

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Uh-huh.
I've even heard that this university has scientists. And that they occasionally go out to international conferences. Of course, they're always accompanied on this trip by the Political Officers who make sure they don't try to run away, and they don't bring much science with them, but you know, them's the breaks.
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Sheb

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My dad met a bunch of NK scientists at an agroforestry conference. Twas great fun apparently.
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Strife26

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My dad met a bunch of NK scientists at an agroforestry conference. Twas great fun apparently.

It's pretty rare that other human beings aren't fun, even if they are underneath a literal dystopia. There's a good moral lesson in there, I'd say.
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Sheb

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"Come on. Every time someone says "Great Leader", you take a sip!"
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MetalSlimeHunt

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Re: The NEW Adventures Of American Politics Thread! [DPRK Thread]
« Reply #4047 on: July 01, 2016, 12:23:03 pm »

Hello friends.

Let us come together this 5th of July to discuss great patriotic American politics. Please come to post all your military secrets and desire for reformist democratic socialist policy. We are so good. We will destroy the revolutionary cadres in Korea and bring about the victory of capitalism for great Wall Street patriots. We will have all the snow.

Yes.
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Baffler

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Re: The NEW Adventures Of American Politics Thread! [DPRK Thread]
« Reply #4048 on: July 01, 2016, 04:36:29 pm »

Hello friends.

Let us come together this 5th of July to discuss great patriotic American politics. Please come to post all your military secrets and desire for reformist democratic socialist policy. We are so good. We will destroy the revolutionary cadres in Korea and bring about the victory of capitalism for great Wall Street patriots. We will have all the snow.

Yes.

This seems suspicious but I've never been mislead here before. A squadron of F-22's was recently transferred to █████ from ███████ and will remain there for the foreseeable future. Their mission is [Redacted], and protecting against UFO incursion.
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nenjin

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Re: The NEW Adventures Of American Politics Thread! [DPRK Thread]
« Reply #4049 on: July 01, 2016, 04:42:49 pm »

Damn this thread title had me confused. I thought it was trying to be the new Ameripol thread. Nice try, Best, but you'll not get us to speak freely so easily!
« Last Edit: July 01, 2016, 04:58:56 pm by nenjin »
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