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[Orange Wizard]

Hurrah! Be happy, and when you're not, laugh at your silly unhappiness!

Seriously. I do this (which may mean it's actually quite dumb) whenever I feel down. Then I go do something, like bake a cake.

And if you're feeling happy, that's fantastic! Then you can laugh some more! And bake more cakes!

[Urist McScoopbeard]

I don't know about cakes meh man, but I DO make the world's best eggs, and THAT is fact.

[Sigulbard]

You should engage in violent crimes and gang activity. Also drugs.
It's ok, it's just a phase - we've all went (or are still going) through that...Right?

Dammit why is it always just me.

[Urist McScoopbeard]

Its not a phase when its been going on for ~3 years!

[ChairmanPoo]

You've engaged in drugs, violent crime and gang activities for the last three years?

[Putnam]

... As for why I don't own a house in the mountains, it's because im a 16-yr old middle class, suburban boy whose parents think that anything more northerly Than florida is disgusting.

You're 16 years old and you're having regrets about your life? Your life hasn't even STARTED yet. You have SO much opportunity ahead of you. You can be exactly how you want to be given time.

[anzki4]

You're 16 years old and you're having regrets about your life? Your life hasn't even STARTED yet.

I find this rather misguided statement. I used to think along those lines, that is: "when I have graduated, my life will begin and blah blah blah". But your life has started already and your living it. I used to think that the years before graduating and getting a job don't matter, as long as you manage to pull it trough.

When you have graduated you have already lived at least a fifth or fourth of you life - assuming you're lucky and live a hundred years. Realizing that this is already my life and I should make the best of it greatly improved my overall happiness.

[Putnam]

I don't mean that literally; I mean that it's far too early to have regrets about not living life a certain way, especially about where you live etc.

[Urist McScoopbeard]

@Poo: I meant depression you scoundrel!

and Putnam my friend, I am 16 thats about 1/6 of my life probably, I only have another 5.

[Gervassen]

Regrets, I've had a few, but then again, too few to mention. I did what I had to do and saw it through without exemption. I planned each charted course, each careful step along the byway. And more, much more than this, I did it my way

[RedKing]

I've learned that regret is a fairly useless thing. Until time machines are invented, there's little utility in dwelling on past mistakes. Certainly, you need to be cognizant of them so you can spot where you went wrong and try to NOT DO THAT THING in the future. But beating yourself up over it, or saying "If only I had...." all the time...it's just a counterproductive waste of energy.

And it's often short-sighted. Mistakes and misfortunes can contain the seed of greater happiness. There's an old Taoist parable...

Spoiler: Old Taoist Parable. (click to show/hide)

It begins with a poor farmer in ancient China who worked a small plot of land with his teenage son. During this time horses were considered a sign of wealth; the richest person in the province owned no more than a few of them. One day a wild horse jumped the poor farmer’s fence and began grazing on his land. According to local law, this meant that the horse now rightfully belonged to him and his family. The son could hardly contain his joy, but the father put his hand on his son’s shoulder and said, “Who knows what’s good or bad?” The next day the horse made its escape back to the mountains and the boy was heartbroken. “Who knows what’s good or bad?” his father said again.  On the third day the horse returned with a dozen wild horses following.  “We’re rich!” the son cried, to which the father again replied, “Who knows what’s good or bad?” On the fourth day the boy climbed on one of the wild horses and was thrown, breaking his leg. His father ran to get the doctor; soon both of them were attending to the boy, who was upset and in a great deal of pain. The old farmer looked deeply into his son’s eyes, and said, “My son, who knows what is good or bad?” And on the fifth day the province went to war.  Army recruiters came through the town and took all the eligible young men to fight the war.  All except for the young man with the broken leg.

I should have worked harder in undergraduate and/or picked a more lucrative major. But then I wouldn't have wound up moving to Raleigh for work and eventually meeting my wife, getting married and having my two kids. My kids exist because I picked a crappy major. 

I shouldn't have had an affair (two, actually), which destroyed my marriage. But then if I hadn't, I wouldn't be this happy, confident person that I've become since the separation and I wouldn't have met the love of my life and both she and I would still be in our apprehensive, stilted, unfulfilled seperate lives.


You just can't predict what the long-term consequences of "bad" choices will turn out to be, so there's little point in regret.

[Urist McScoopbeard]

Its not what I've done, it is what I haven't done. I have literally done maybe 3 interesting things in my 16 years alive, the rest of the time ive sat alone or played videogames. So fuck seeing what the consequence of that are, in the last year Ive said "no, fuck you!" to videogames, I packed away my xbox and I pretty just play stuff with my pc friends now and not nearly as much, I haven't MADE bad decisions, I don't do drugs, I don't smoke, and I don't drink (although depression makes me want to some times) I just haven't made any decisions at all, 16 years. Wasted.

Really, really, really. It all things I've missed out on that vex me:

-never had a girlfriend
-terrible at school dances
-never really tried anything different for a long time
-I was a dick in elementary/middle-school so missed out on those years completely
-I didn't even learn to ride a bike until I was 13!
-... I don't want to remember more so i'll stop here

as for short-sighted mistakes containg seeds of greater happiness, 16 years of mistakes and little happiness is entirely against that. I can't predict what's going to happen with my life, but i'm terrified it's going to be absolutely nothing!

and thanks again to everybody who's contributed.

[Putnam]

You've never had a girlfriend? I'm 18 and I've never had a girlfriend. Because I was too busy playing video games until... your age, at which point I got my shit together and learned guitar, modding, forgot my entire life before I turned 16*, and still counted myself too busy to get a girlfriend because I was too busy learning shit.

Note that I don't expect you to follow what I say exactly--one size does not fit all. Try to do what interests you. Get good at it.

*don't get stupid big crushes on any individual--ruins productivity

[Xantalos]

You've never had a girlfriend? I'm 18 and I've never had a girlfriend. Because I was too busy playing video games until... your age, at which point I got my shit together and learned guitar, modding, forgot my entire life before I turned 16*, and still counted myself too busy to get a girlfriend because I was too busy learning shit.

Note that I don't expect you to follow what I say exactly--one size does not fit all. Try to do what interests you. Get good at it.

*don't get stupid big crushes on any individual--ruins productivity

This (for me at least). I couldn't do anything for WEEKS.

[Putnam]

no less than 4 years in my case. god damn it was horrible.