Even a two-player round can be fun when Hans is one of them. He was Lillian Helsbrecht, traitor HoP, while I was Tina Morris, forensics tech. It was mostly combat, but we did have time to taunt each other inbetween skirmishes, until we ended up leaning on the fourth wall with his admin powers.
Three figures enter the room. One of them is a reptile with a blood-soaked shirt, while another wields a large shotgun. The armed human stays by the door, while the two others sit around a table. The interviewer pulls out an universal recorder and turns it on.
”For the record, state your name and rank,” he says.
”Tina Mouhr'yzk, Forenssic technisian,” the Unathi replies.
”Now, would you explain why you arrived to Central Command alone, heavily armoured and covered in blood, with the Head of Personnel reported by the cleanup crew to be torn to pieces?”
”It iss a long sstory. In sshort, sshe attacked me in cold blood and I did what I had to. But I didn't kill him.”
”Well, what happened, then?”
Tina breathes in deeply.
”It begun ass a normal work sshift, exsept it wass only me and Lillian. Ass I wass gearing up, sshe came in from the armoury, where sshe sshouldn't be exsept in an emergensy. When I assked her about thiss, sshe threw a flasshbang at me. I dodged it, but sshe pulled out ssome ssort of crosssbow and shot me multiple times. Sshe ran away. Sshe told me sshe wantss to play a ”game” of hunting, sso hunt we did, ass ssome myssteriouss force overloaded every light and drained the sstation of power.”
"Drained it of power, you say?"
”Yess. Ass sshe wass a lawbreaker, I set her to be arressted. Sshe gave a hint that she had hidden an all-accesss ID card in her offise, so I headed there. We exchanged fire with non-lethal weaponss, taunting each other all the way, and while sshe did defeat me, Citissen Riot resscued me by chassing her away. I broke into the offise and took the card. The poisson in the crosssbow'ss boltss had already sstarted to affect me and I wass in pain, sso I headed to the bar for a drink. With ssome liquid courage, I went in and geared up with the armoury and tactical gear storage. Sshe turned up and I chassed her to teleport away.”
”Hold on right here. You raided the armoury and tactical gear to take down one criminal?”, the interviewer interjects.
”Thiss wass no ordinary criminal. With her accesss rightss, sshe had some of the besst gear available on the sstation. I had to level the field. And keep lisstening, I am not done.”
”Continue, then.”
”I will. With the gear, I eventually caught her with a beanbag to the sshoulder. Sstill bound by law, I captured her with ssome handcuffss and a chair. I dissarmed her and began to interrogate her, violently, but sshe didn't break. No, sshe insstead eventually esscaped from the chair and cuffss, and healed all her woundss, gloating. I unloaded on her, but it didn't work. Sshe ssaid sshe wass a demon from Bluespace out to kill me for whatever reasson I apparently couldn't undersstand. However, sshe ssaid sshe wass bored with me and exploded into gore. Exhaussted by my ordealss and the poisson, adrenaline russh over, I ressted for the sshift until the transsfer came.”
The interviewer blinks multiple times.
”Th-that's your story!?”, he blurts out. ”Fucking demons? Oh, that's laughable. How about you'll tell me the REAL story now?”
Tina smiles. ”How about sshe tellss you that?” She pulls out an universal recorder.
Lillian Helsbrecht says, "YOU SHOT ME."
Lillian Helsbrecht says, "IN THE GODDAMN FOOT."
Lillian Helsbrecht [145.9] asks, "Do you want to play a game?"
Tina Morris [145.9] says, "No."
Lillian Helsbrecht [145.9] says, "Well, that's unfortunate."
Lillian Helsbrecht [145.9] says, "Because we're going to play a game."
Lillian Helsbrecht [145.9] asks, "Are you drunk?"
Tina Morris [145.9] stammers, "chchomeTim'e'S,' you neeD Tu' Lift THe SspiritsS."
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Topic: Space Station 13: Urist McStation (Read 2120618 times)