--Journal of 'Lucky' Stothoaru: 1st Granite, 104--
So the dwarves are still roaming around outside even as we hold our new years' party, which mainly consists of punching each other in the face. I've arranged for a few coffins to cover any deaths, but they seem to be keeping it tame this year. I guess we're not all as pissed off. Kind of fitting that we began and ended last year with a god damn dwarven siege; I wonder if that trend will continue.
Mrs. Willsauce yelled at me for a while about not reforming the military and blah blah dwarven mining blah blah but I mean really. They're military dwarves, they probably haven't ever even held a pick in their lives. Why the hell would a mountainhome send out its most valuable dwarves in a siege to some godforsaken middle-of-nowhere shit tower?
I was reluctant to start training again mainly because I was worried she might actually go and get herself killed for real, since while she was presumed dead all the masonry in the tower basically ground to a halt, and let me tell you Xuspgas is no Stozu Burnedleather the Masonry of Hell. But if she wants to go fall on some dwarf's sword in a muddy field, more power to her. Long live the Disloyal Severity.
Unfortunately we've had to all but stop construction on the highest level of the tower because everybody's afraid they'll get hit by a bolt. Damn cowards.
--12th Granite, 104--
I wish people would stop knocking shit down in the bedrooms and the dining room. Apparently the tables got wrecked and nobody told me so people just weren't eating there. What is wrong with you people??
--23rd Granite, 104--
I decided to dispose of some of the captive dwarves in the drowning room. I sent Xuspgas in there too (to 'let them out') and he went because he is a stupid idiot so I drowned him for being a shitty mason and looking at Tomato funny. I mean come on, I had Archek link a lever to the cage like, right in front of him.
--10th Slate, 104--
Turns out they actually can get you up there! Due to Arstruk's noble sacrifice I have told people to stop hanging out on the roof, are you retarded, my gods. I am thankful that with tremendous foresight I designed the draining system not to be breachable because I can tell the dwarves out there are eyeing it. Or admiring it, I really can't tell.
--11th Felsite, 104--
Tomato took the time to clean out the drowning chamber and told me it smelled awfully familiar. I asked her if it smelled like poor masonry. She didn't think it was funny.
--27th Felsite, 104--
We noticed the dwarves had left, so we lowered the bridge and started collecting all those bodies.
--1st Hematite, 104--
Oh, kobolds! Everybody get inside so they'll wander over the cage traps.
--6th Hematite, 104--
Goodie! Now we can start breeding kobold slaves, too. I am sure the ladies of the tower will be very pleased with this eventuality; I hear kobold pets are all the rage nowadays.
--23rd Hematite, 103--
Why, I will never know. Eight in all, not including children that I will drown the moment they become nuisances.
--7th Malachite, 104--
They became nuisances.
What a tragedy. Drown them all. The candy was really watery death.
--21st Malachite, 104--
Fishybang is refusing to leave the drowning chamber. I suspect she is protesting the upcoming execution. If she doesn't leave soon I'm just going to drown her too.
--26th Malachite, 104--
Eventually Fishybang bowed to my authority and the execution proceeded.
Well that's no good. Although probably indistinguishable from any other fistfight in there. Good luck, you lot! I'm locking the door.
--27th Malachite, 104--
Good show.
--12th Galena, 104--
Unfortunately, this is pretty common fare by now. They seem absolutely obsessed with wiping us out. I've talked to several people and nobody knows how to put together a military force anymore. Apparently bureaucracy has collapsed since the second-to-last siege.
They've brought a lot of marksdwarves with them this time, so the top floor is completely off-limits.
--25th Limestone, 104--
The mass grave is filling up pretty well.
--4th Timber, 104--
I... really don't know.
--End Journal--
--Event Log: 23rd Timber, 104--
"Oh, fuck, I'm not inside! I'm not inside! Don't pull it up yet, I'm not ins--"
--End Log--
Surviving migrants this year:...