"Aaaaw, The beauty of combat, bones breaking, blood flying, men screaming for mercy. It fills The Rocks
manly heart with joy. You truly honor The Rock with your skill Min Max, there aren't many men who could
last this long against The Rock. The Rock was beginning to think that The Rock and Badassitude where
the last warriors left in this universe. But sadly, we must fight each other. Its in our nature Min Max,
you know this. It can't be avoided. But if we must do battle, it will be the greatest battle this world
has ever known! Come at The Rock Min Max, not as a man, but a warrior."
Lets make the gods themselves fear our names!
Sing the Badass Rocks theme song as The Rock charges at Min Max, trying to make a killing
blow with the horseshoe.
"What's going on?"
"A man fight."
"I'LL KILL YOU!"
"No, I won't hurt you! You're nice!"
"Uhm, actually it's a life or death situation, duh. I have to kill him, doofus."
"Can we get this over with already?"
"YES! CHAAAAARGE!"
With that, he spurs his bug forwards for a final attack, aiming to destroy The Rock once and for all while this plays in the background.
(Rock dex: 6+5)
(Minmax dex: 6+6)
(Minmax dex: 2+6)
(Ant dex: 5-1)
(Rock dex: 6+5)
(Rock dex: 3+5)
(Minmax dex: 6+6)
(Ant dex: 2-1)
(Rock str: 5+1)
(Ant end: 2)
The two warriors charge at each other at top speed, and
both of their songs begin to play at once. Minmax is the first to strike, swinging his spiked warhammer like a croquet mallet from atop his ant, but The Rock nimbly rolls out of the way of both the hammer and the disoriented insect before gripping the horseshoe like a set of brass knuckles and leaping into the fray. His fist goes straight through the ant's cephalothorax, but Minmax backflips off of his steed before the blow can connect with him, landing lightly on his feet as the music stops and birds fly from the trees, breaking the silence.
"Well he didn't try to kill us... so I'll take that as a yes. Let's go help him out shall we?" Lucky say to Lilia while fixing his new hat to be a bit more comfortable. He walks toward where the fighting is going on and tells Lilia to attack the slow guy that seems to want a hug.
Walk toward the battle a little ways (but not too close) and tell Lilia to go attack Grubson. Focus on dodging any attacks aimed at me.
Wells, better than nothings.
Offer Lilia a hug.
Once properly hugged, shield myself from Badassitude with her many legs.
Aim for Grubson, not focusing on speed, but rather on his neck and slice it open. (Max attack Str)
(Lilia dex: 4+2)
(Grubson dex: 6-6)
(Badassitude dex: 6+1)
(Badassitude dex: 1+1-4)
(Grubson dex: 4-6)
(Lilia dex: 1+2)
(Grubson dex: 1-6)
(Lilia str: 3+6)
(Grubson end: 1+6)
As Grubson lumbers towards Lucky and Lilia, Badassitude rushes out to meet him, swinging his scythe like the madman that he is. As the weapon laughs, its blue-steel blade arcs through the air and... misses? Yes, somehow in Badassitude's fervor to attack, he completely missed his target, who didn't even move to get out of the way. Even Grubson stands amazed at what happened, until he spots Lilia flying towards him on her new wings. He tries to crouch beneath her attack, but realizes too late that he's too slow as hundreds of legs crash into his head with the force of a small car. He tries to remain standing against the storm of blows, but one final kick from Lilia knocks him unconscious, sending him toppling to the ground.
"A gun? I think I can do that. Just give me a second." Giordano's tentacles weave themselves together, forming a long canon-shaped barrel, mounted on four slithering tentacles. "This good enough?"
"Well, I prefer a gun that can't talk back to me. I've had...poor experiences in the past with such things, let's leave it at that. Though I suppose shouldn't let bad experiences in the past interfere with current relationships."
Vodka Watermelon does her eye-laser thing.
"Woah, watch where yer shooting those things, ma'am."
Suddenly, the sound of combat breaks out to the south(?) of their location.
"Sounds like there's a ruckus starting. We'd better go investigate. C'mon, Giordano."
Kordos picks up Giordano and runs toward the combat zone, ready to shoot at anyone who attacks him.
Well, Giordano doesn't say anything, seeing as he's been turned to steel. And he's far too heavy to be pushed, let alone picked up like a regular pistol. At least the combat in the south seems to have died down.
Oh my god I'm sorry people I just tried to kill please don't hurt me I'll make it up to you somehow I promise!
"Yes! I'll join up with you and Mittens, I think... I don't see why not, and since people might try and stab me over that incident, I need all the help I can get.
Hide behind things. Try and avoid eye-contact with everyone.
You run off into the tall grass and hide there, where none of your eyes can pick up on anyone.
"I'm gonna mesh wit' Mittensh an' hish cool portal-thingysh."
Have Mittensh open a portal, then toss rocks into it. Inspect rocks after they pass through the portals.
(Mittensh affinity: 5+2)
Mittensh opens up a large gap in front of you, and you toss a few rocks into it, where they keep falling, picking up speed indefinitely as if in a vacuum. Then the portal closes, trapping the rocks in the void. Looks like you'll need another portal fro them to exit through.
MAP:Sir Badassitude(yellow):Fan-scythe. Legs sprouting from shoulders, angry rat stuck to hand
Vodka(orange):Steel eye-armor. Strong
Min Max(red):Smelly hammer. Body made of lucky wood.
Lucky(pink):Legwing Lilia, anti-magic hat. Missing right eye
Henry(blue):Mittensh
G.C.(purple):Pimpin' steel cannon
The Rock(black):Lucky horseshoe
'Tough Bastard' Grubson(white):Nothing. Unconscious