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Game-Breakingly

Very

Moderately

Just a Little

Not at All

[stefmor90]

"Oh SHIT Willy's the good guy? Sorry I have to go save the loli!"
Run and try to save angel by being the guardian angel of the guardian angel. Save the guardian angel by flanking and smacking John in the face with the fan.

[Wwolin]

It sounded like a computer program. How did you program it?

The old one was a program. I just made a bunch of values assigned to objects and abilities, and depending on the luck roll, it would select a certain amount of these abilities. Of course, this led to issues with negative objects and comprehending what the hell "- 1 shoe" was supposed to mean, and when I found out about The Metamorphica, I figured that it was a far better system than what I had, so I made something similar.

[Unholy_Pariah]

Do super top secret hiding in the tall grass stuff.

[Persus13]

Wake up, mutter something, then kill angel.

[superBlast]

"RAAAAAAAAAWR!!!!" Lucky gives his entire being to his rage.

Spoiler: Example minus the green skin and eyes (click to show/hide)

Give into my rage and crush the old guy's neck with my bare hands. Don't even dodge whatever attacks are thrown at me, just focus on killing him with everything at my disposal (nails, teeth, head, knees, hands, feet, elbows, everything)

((I'm assuming I'll get some sort of bonus for something in exchange for not even attempting to dodge.))

[AKingsQuest]

Do you smell what The rock is cooking? No you don't because its a secret.

[Greenstarfanatic]

Keep blowing the horn, because Badassitude kinda likes it and Alani kinda has a bit of a crush on him. Proceed to fire three arrows: 1 at Sven, 1 at Willy, and 1 at the Dragon. Thingy.

[Unholy_Pariah]

What do you think will happen if the marlboro kills someone?
Will it get loot?
...oversized marlboro king + epic loots = ive killed us all

[Toaster]

So you played a chord.

On a trumpet?

[scapheap]

"If you had just handed it back, she would not be bleeding to death."

Spike storm Lucky

[Greenstarfanatic]

So you played a chord.

On a trumpet?

YUS. I AM JUST THAT BADASS.

Which is Ironic, since Badassery is my lowest stat.

[Person]

Keep running, east at first. Try and lose it in the forest. If I can't, start heading north and bring it towards lucky, and his combat partner. If I somehow do all this in one turn, shout "I GOT A PRESENT FOR YA!" at them.
(It would pick me as a target. It's almost like lucky and I really do have the dice for/against us based on our names alone. And now I go to attempt to please the dice gods.)

[stefmor90]

Keep blowing the horn, because Badassitude kinda likes it and Alani kinda has a bit of a crush on him. Proceed to fire three arrows: 1 at Sven, 1 at Willy, and 1 at the Dragon. Thingy.

How the hell are you firing arrows while playing a trumpet. I'm scared.

[Greenstarfanatic]

Keep blowing the horn, because Badassitude kinda likes it and Alani kinda has a bit of a crush on him. Proceed to fire three arrows: 1 at Sven, 1 at Willy, and 1 at the Dragon. Thingy.

How the hell are you firing arrows while playing a trumpet. I'm scared.

I HAVE A VERY STRONG JAW DON'T JUDGE ME.

[stefmor90]

Operation save loli is a go. Unless John becomes all Handsome Jack or something and kills me. If John lives he might just become the greatest antagonist of all time.