And I feel the need to tell the world!
Using a combined force of melee dwarfs in master-craft bronze and mass war dogs I finally passed the threshold.
How do YOU deal with sieges, and when was the first time that you succeed? How about times when you failed utterly?
Master-Dwarf bronze? That's some mighty army there. You won't forget that
My first siege... Ah. A desert river Fort back in .31, I wanted to build everything above ground and mirror it with a massive prison/labyrinth complex underground, completely fit with its own underground Fortress within another Fortress with a single bridge over a 31z lvl drop... The plans were big.
I was always on the look out for Giant Badgers, something that was very common on my map. This was also where I made my first discovery - that War Dogs could scare away the most fierce wild animals. Soon there were force fields of dogs protecting my settlements, and I was even getting more confident - fighting the lesser badgers by splitting them up and chasing them down with military Dwarf and dog.
One Dwarf... I forget the name, even the name of the Fort! But I do remember this; she was one of 5 of the Fort's only good warriors... In that she killed a Giant Badger - unarmed. Two of her comrades were killed in the effort.
And so it came to be this fearful hatred of the Giant Badger grew, until one fateful moment when I wondered why I was letting the Giant Badgers attack me - I should attack them! They're only wild animals, what can they honestly do?
They turned around and slaughtered nearly all of the dogs and the Dwarves. I desperately tried pulling all of my Dwarves back.
I had learned why DF was Fun. The soapmaker incident happened. All of my captured Giant Badgers were released. On hindsight it must have been a gremlin or something, but at first all I saw was the soapmaker by the lever getting torn to pieces and I assumed... Maybe he was trying to stop the gremlin?
For a moment after; peace. The only Giant Badgers were from across the river, silently gauging a mode of safe crossing to begin the fight anew.
Then a goblin ambush. Then another. Then a siege. Then the river froze. Then Giant Badgers.
Every Dwarf perished. Every animal slaughtered. One Dwarf - the only Dwarf with a weapon, a copper shortsword managed to maim a single goblin before being killed. The miners were busy trying to Fortify the last underground holds of the Dwarves, I was prepared to live until the last Dwarf died. One Dwarf, wearing a Giant Badger bone helm stood short against the Badgers new assault, but she too was killed.
The last Dwarf had secured himself within the store rooms, was a miner and had a pick. Good start.
He tried to dig a tunnel into the last Fortress... All he had to do was find a way to seal the last gap and they would stand a chance.
The moment his feet touched the surface, every single goblin on the map turned towards him.
A bolt to his upper body, tearing the lungs, a spear to his skull - a spear by the warlord who led the first attack.
Since then none of my Forts have fallen to goblin siege. Pretty much every Fort I make now is heavily militarized so that no Dwarf should ever take more than one injury - if they are injured, they fall and are replaced by the innumerable residents of the Fortress.
I take this to heart when I plan my Forts - losing to goblin sieges is never allowed to happen; which is why in almost every case when an opportunity to destroy the Fort via a non goblin means presents itself, it is linked to a lever and saved for a very red goblin Christmas.
I can just imagine the look on the Goblin's faces when after years of siege, constant losses on their part and the final brutal room to room fighting with insane Dwarves who have everything to lose; the enter a cavernous hall and find their prize:
Wave after wave of screeching undead, black rotted ravens and mutilated elf corpses shambling towards them through the darkness - and behind it all, horrible, horrible screams from the depths, while a mad Necromancer driven insane from centuries of isolation exacts his revenge on the Fort's inhabitants - the hapless Goblins.
use dfhacks siren command to alert sleeping and partying slackers... its not cheating, even gives them a bad thought.
I feel like after what your military tends to go through... They deserve some off time. It's particularly demoralizing for the enemy to realize his arch nemesis is having a party when they siege.