From the Journal of Saint, Military Governor of Murdermachines, Master of the Void-Wraiths, Beloved of Armok, Templar of the Blood God, and Empress of the Underground.
FELSITE 8, YEAR OF ARMOK 252
Finally got Derm to sit still long enough for someone to paint a purty picture of his face.
He went on at length about his best friends and how much he dislikes AnimaRytak. Can't say I disagree on that account; the booze-sucking kobold has been avoiding me for weeks, but it's no secret why.
Oh, no, Anima. Don't think I've forgotten your crimes, you purple-robed bastard...
...
Ehem, yes, well.
Got another soul to come through the portal today. Insisted on being called "Steve, Destroyer of Trees" but I don't have any more axes on-hand, and wouldn't give this fellow one even if I did. I mean, look at him!
The poor blighter hasn't got hardly a clue where his bloody toes are, and even
less of a clue what to do with them! No, I said to him. Not a woodcutter. His next choice?
Potash making.
I sort of glared at him for a while before filling out "wood burning" on the immigration forms.I just hope the fucker doesn't fall in and we need to expend someone useful to fish his bones out.
In other news, I also told Jables and his friend to stop stacking rocks and start carving them outta the cold walls, preferably in the shape of a temple. Honestly, I give them half a chance to diversify, and nothing gets done around this place...
FELSITE 14, YEAR OF ARMOK 252
Some of the masons working on the new and improved front door spotted an elf caravan off in the distance, headed towards us!
I'm going through the most recent stockpile records now to determine what we can sell. Maybe we can shift some worthless microcline off on them for some sunberries?More booze is never a bad thing.
FELSITE 16, YEAR OF ARMOK 252
Hm...
They don't seem to have any wagons. My experiences with elves before were always a bit on the "Send 'em ta Armok!" side, so I'm not certain if this is normal, but even if it is it's a bad sign.
No matter; if they bring goods, they be welcome.
FELSITE 20, YEAR OF ARMOK 252
Yeah. Yeah, that's right you can't, you fucker.
FELSITE 22, YEAR OF ARMOK 252
It's not my fault! Now we're going to have to deal with a nudist freak streaking through the hallways like some sort of demented mascot.
I should have stayed in the Void.
FELSITE 27, YEAR OF ARMOK 252
Construction has finally begun! This shall be my Magnum Opus, a Wonder like the world has never known! Templars shall flock to our banner! Pilgrims shall come from miles around to gape at the splendor of our creation, and revel in the spectacle of the ritual sacrifice.
In the name of the Stonemaker, Armok, and the Gory Spirit, this place of majesty shall be dedicated to the Trinity of Blood. Through the intercession of the entrails of our foes, we children of the Void shall be cleansed and redeemed in the eyes of the gods, and we shall take our rightful place as rulers of this world!
BLOOD FOR THE BLOOD GOD! BLOOD FOR ARMOK! AHAHAHHAHAHAHHAHHAHAHHAHAHAHAHA~
...
yes.
~~~
Told you it was tonight
Also, I did, in fact, try to reason with the elves, but when they refuse to sell me strawberry seeds and a few cages made of crappy twigs in exchange for an entire donkeyload of gemstones, I tend to lose my patience
really fast.
EDIT: Woah, I just realized that the Fearbringer enjoys something called clown loach. I am almost completely certain that is not a vanilla thing. Am I safe in assuming it involves ampersands in some way?