I MUST update tonight! MUST! NOT! RUIN! PERFECT! RECORD!
Proceed to kill everything evil
[6] Okay. Everyone check to see if you're alive.
Fuse myself with the universe, gaining omnipotence.
[1] You fuse with a black hole. This turns out to be a bad idea.
You cause a Time Paradox by not helping your past self out! Therefore, past-You is wandering around confused, freeformschooler didn't get empowered, and you stop existing completely!
Respawn and aid the Embodiment of Technology in battle.
[2] You don't help any, and in fact get bisected by the lich's backswing.
destroy all portals except the narnia one but have the Gm remember my +4 bonus this time.
[6+4] You seal off your corner of the universe from any way to move away! ...Oh, crap. You're trapped!
Engage portable honor, which lets me match any bonus! After all, spellslinging is an art...
[1] You engage a permanent Honor Field, drawing from your own lifeforce!
Attempt to figure out what is going on.
[3] There seems to be a bunch of magical girls in a cottage, a lich and Sauron battling some technological embodiment, a couple thousand tourists, and a ton of portals. Oh, and time paradoxes.
Attempt to leave the Magic Girls faction and join the Villains faction.
With Furtaka's help, you do! A bit more...permanently than expected, but meh.
Mass empowering event.
[3] You hand out a bunch of new, magical "toys" to console the girls over their recent losses due to a recent rabbit rampage. They had to put poor Fluffy down...
Wait... Shit.
Tourists. I hope to dear god they're not NetHack tourists...
Not yet, but they will be...
*points to the portal to the Dungeons of Doom*
>Battle the supervillains in glorious combat
You do. See Boss Turn.
THIS HATMAN
SHOWER INSERTGENDERPRONOUN WITH INFINITE CREDIT CARDS FOR GREAT JUSTICE
Sadly, he was killed in a tragic rabbit accident.
Survey newfound magical stuff from alternate dimension.
Snort magical stuff up nose if it fits.
All of it. Every last grain.
You start to, but lose it all suddenly and with a *pop* appear back in that weird portal-filled place.
BOSS TURN:
[6/2] Three new portals open up: One to Seattle in 2055, one to Seattle in 1000 BC, and one to Boatmurdered.
Four people battle: The Embodiment, the Lich, the Sauron, and the Guy who Is Just Really Hard to Kill. [2+4v6+3v5+3v2(+4)] Unsurprisingly, da_nang does almost nothing except get injuries from all three Bosses. The Embodiment gets some special bit knocked off by a temporary alliance of the Lich and Sauron, who recognize the crappy technomagical expy for what it is. [1] The Embodiment falls apart into Knight Tiger, who recognizes da_nang and is uncertain of what to do; Squidward, in his own body; Dr. Clef, who has no idea how he got there; and a whole lotta scrap.
661 takes 862 and [3] a copy of
Charlotte's Web and enters the tower. Which, if you'll recall, is the lich. (One of them, and they're all the same guy; it's a long story, okay?) [6v1] The tower collapses on 661, taking one of my favorite SCPs with it.
The tourists go into random portals to escape! Some survive, others die, others get imprisoned, still others get reclassified as D-Class Personnel.
The portals activate! Well, they've been active, so here's everything that's come out:
Portal to YAFB Aperture Science [4]: The Lichette, Dirg, and Misko27, who look at the insanity and reconsider their rivalry.
Portal to Ray's Castle [2]: Nothing
Portal to Site 19 [6]: A whole bunch of Foundation personnel come out. They marvel at all the SCPs and anomalous objects they need to contain...
Portal to Galaxy Core [6]: The Embodiment of Magic (another lich form, don't ask) saunters out.
Portal to Half an Hour Ago [2]: Nothing
Portal to Middle Earth [2]: Nothing
Portal to One Turn From Now [3]: Squidward runs out of the portal, yelling at Squidward.
Portal to Dungeons of Doom [5]: A capital L exits the portal!
Portal to Narnia [4]: Out comes four kids who look like they think they're kings and queens.
Portal to New York [2]: Nothing
Portal to One Turn Ago: Nothing
Portal to Seattle (2055) [3]: A mangy dog
Portal to Seattle (-1000) [2]: Nothing
Portal to Boatmurdered [6]: Magma!
IF YOU WERE SKIPPED, YOU PROBABLY DIED.
No faction leader may have a faction leader bonus greater than half the number of the leader's followers.
Familiars and other weak minions always die with the faction, unless tied closely to the master.
One action per turn.
Oh for the love of Spinal stop summoning more people the arena is doing that very well for you.
PERMANENT HONOR FIELD!
Magma flooding!
Lich's Collapsed Rebuilt Tower (lich is genus loci)
Crumpled Spacetime
Former Shoehorn Empire
Cheerful Cottage
Portal to YAFB Aperture Science
Portal to Ray's Castle
Portal to Site 19
Portal to Galaxy Core
Portal to Half an Hour Ago
Portal to Middle Earth
Portal to One Turn From Now
Portal to Dungeons of Doom
Portal to Narnia
Portal to New York
Portal to One Turn Ago
Portal to Seattle (2055)
Portal to Seattle (-1000)
Portal to Boatmurdered
da_nang, Reality-Supporting Dragon from Space (+4 to avoid dying)
Empiricist, Embodiment of YAFB-I
Minor Barrier (-1 to attackers)
Leader: scapheap, Sailor Moon (+2 from faction)
Blossom
Bubbles
Buttercup
Cardcaptor Torika
Pam Akumachi
Kitty Pride
Pistachio, GraveHaunter's Daughter, a twice-orphaned Froslass
Sailor Mars
Sailor Jupiter
Leader: Tim (+3)
Persus13 (+4) (TRAPPED IN AN ALTERNATE DIMENSION!)
Spinal_Taper, Former Crippled Cybernetic Hermaphroditic Improper Fraction Actress/Singer/Etc, Current Guy in a Bathrobe
Dr. Bright
Dr. Clef
Dr. Gears
Agents [REDACTED], [REDACTED], [REDACTED], [REDACTED], and [REDACTED]
12 Research Assistants
SCP-076-2
SCP-105
28 D-Class Personnel
Look up their names when it isn't so late
freeformschooler, Morris Broadband
Dirg
Knight Tiger
Lichette
L
Magikarp
Misko27
SCP-661(?), Carrying SCP-862