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Author Topic: Roll To Redshirt  (Read 90704 times)

tomio175

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Re: Roll To Redshirt
« Reply #435 on: January 30, 2013, 12:16:47 pm »

DEATH AND DESTRUCTION FOR ALL... MY ENEMIES!
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...You're arguing with the GM? Why don't you argue with Jesus about how much Peter liked clams?
Because each player's delicious tears are fuel for the continued torture that is the Warrens of Oric the Awesome.

TopHat

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Re: Roll To Redshirt
« Reply #436 on: February 01, 2013, 03:14:03 pm »

THE RECLAIMATION OF SANTLOS I - TURN III

376REDS+18AFVSV275GRES+40AFVS

GWG uses logic! (3) maybe he used a different gun each time?
Turnshirt Persus concentrates his support on the farmhouse! (3) the support is mostly tied down in other areas of conflict. And the Howitzer battery is reloading.
Rabidgam pulls out one of his own ribs! (4) it hurts, but he gets a nice sharp pointy rib.
Fireiy snipes! (6) he blasts two greens. One of them looks fairly important. Before he can celebrate this triumph however, a counter-snipe shot takes the left half of Fireiy's head off. A blue pats his rifle.
Doomblade carries on supporting Lá Resistance! (2) the MG abruptly jams, leaving him desperately trying to clear it.
HugoAI makes mobile turrets! (2) nO, ThAt SpAwnER iS pRoBaBLy a cOMMie.
Dirg covers the resistance fighters! (3) he makes a Green duck.
Benjamaru avenges the dead red! (6) he brings his sword around sharply, killing three Greens. Unfortunately, one Green (guess which!) dodged the blade, which is now lodged in his friend.
Corai attempts to sap the blue respawner! (6) it looks rather vulnerable. But there are guard dogs. Who eat Corai.
Misko uses AA! (4) he finds an AA-mount mounted autocannon.
Onyxjew a fires his laser! (3) he a-fires his rifle.
Pufferfish wants a machine gun! (1) someone from munitions takes his MG away.
Komra uses his weapon thing! (5) he gets another one. He calls it a '67' or something like that.
Kingquest asks for Tank Support! (3) but the Greens have the codes. They'll hear.
Kingfisher commandeers a jeep! (6) he shoves High Marshal Lukas Bigavig off his command jeep and rides off. The aforementioned looks unhappy and shouts something about court-martial and military police.
Donuts uses mental teleportation powers! (1) warp energies explodate him.
Tomio smited with bacon! (5) he smites four Greens!
!!Scientist!! Was ignored! Double rolls! (5) he rushes heroically to the farmhouse! (5) then epically shoots two Greens.
Miauw shoots Green 1! (5) Green 1's chest explodes, and Misko grabs the PIAT.
Scapheap finds a helicopter! (1) there's nothing. Everyone must have left while he was having his 11-mile hike. How inconsiderate.

GREEN REACTION! (6)
Green 3 purges his resistance! (2) he has to slam in a new clip.
Green 4 wants the PIAT! (4) he shoots Miauw and takes it.
Green 6 finds cover! (6) he leaps over a damaged wall at the same time as a red leaps from the other side. They smash into each other and are knocked unconscious.
Green 7 looks for a good signalling position! (4) he heads to the top of the hill.
Green 8 lobs grenades! (6) he lobs a sack containing his entire supply into a foxhole. The explosion and resultant fragmentation kills six reds, two greens, and himself.
Green 9 rushes Doomblade! (3) he decides against it.

RED ARMOUR! (1)
 A tank fires at it's opposite number! (2) another graduate of the Redshirt Tank Gunner Marksmanship Acadamy.

GREEN ARMOUR! (1)
A green tank fires again! (5) another perfect hit, another red tank up in flames. That's three kills so far.

SANTLOS RESISTS! SANTLOS RESISTS! (5)
About forty resistance fighters charge in, the remains of the other cells.

NAPALM STRIKE! (6)  setting the dry grass on fire. The fire begins spreading across the battlefield.

END TURN STATUS!
     366REDS+17AFVS+40RESV261GRES+40AFVS


((oh, I forgot to mention this, but I'm using a D3 for the no. of activated tanks))
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I would ask why fire can burn two men to death without getting hot enough to burn a book, but then I read "INEXTINGUISHABLE RUNNING KAMIKAZE RADIOACTIVE FLAMING ZOMBIE" and realized that logic, reason, and physics are all occupied with crying in the corner right now.

scapheap

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Re: Roll To Redshirt
« Reply #437 on: February 01, 2013, 03:23:21 pm »

((for the love of god))Call high command to map back to the(or a)battle.
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tomio175

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Re: Roll To Redshirt
« Reply #438 on: February 01, 2013, 03:29:44 pm »

Commandeer an AFV, then bless it with holy bacon to increase its marksmanship. AFTERWARDS, OPEN FIRE!
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...You're arguing with the GM? Why don't you argue with Jesus about how much Peter liked clams?
Because each player's delicious tears are fuel for the continued torture that is the Warrens of Oric the Awesome.

Komra

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Re: Roll To Redshirt
« Reply #439 on: February 01, 2013, 03:44:39 pm »

...A D3? How does THAT work?

Also, i suppose the SCP foundation is now the Subcutaneous Calcium-based Projectile Weapons factory. What a change.

> Dual-Wield SCP-127 and (apparently) SCP-067. Fire armor-piercing bone rounds at the enemy armored units.
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Gentlefish

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Re: Roll To Redshirt
« Reply #440 on: February 01, 2013, 03:47:30 pm »

Damnit, munitions! I needed that!

Ooh, fire? FIGHT IT WITH MORE FIRE!

Summon flamethrower. Toast greens.

GreatWyrmGold

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Re: Roll To Redshirt
« Reply #441 on: February 01, 2013, 04:16:05 pm »

...A D3? How does THAT work?
The traditional method is to roll a d6 and divide by two (rounded up), but you could also use a 3-sided regular polyhedra, which the SCP Foundation found once. Speaking of which...

Quote
Also, i suppose the SCP foundation is now the Subcutaneous Calcium-based Projectile Weapons factory. What a change.

> Dual-Wield SCP-127 and (apparently) SCP-067. Fire armor-piercing bone rounds at the enemy armored units.
Wait what? When did you get those?

Attempt to escape bindings, then heal.
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Corai

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Re: Roll To Redshirt
« Reply #442 on: February 01, 2013, 04:16:36 pm »

Respawn and disguise myself as a GREEN. Go back to the respawner and sap it. Backstab all the dogs.
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Jeykab/Bee: how the fuck do you live your daily life corai
Jeykab/Bee: you seem like the person who constantly has mini heart attacks because cuuuute

Persus13

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Re: Roll To Redshirt
« Reply #443 on: February 01, 2013, 04:20:23 pm »

Order fire-support to obliterate the farmhouse. Also kill Corai
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WillowLuman

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Re: Roll To Redshirt
« Reply #444 on: February 01, 2013, 04:55:53 pm »

H-H-H-ijack red and green t-t-tank-s-s-s by substituting myself for their autopilot.
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AKingsQuest

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Re: Roll To Redshirt
« Reply #445 on: February 01, 2013, 05:05:38 pm »

Lets try something different. Call the green commander, try to trick him into giving me the locations
of the greens respawners. Then get into the jeep.

Onyxjew944

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Re: Roll To Redshirt
« Reply #446 on: February 01, 2013, 05:10:41 pm »

Fire mah plasma at the enemy tanks.
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Doomblade187

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Re: Roll To Redshirt
« Reply #447 on: February 01, 2013, 05:12:43 pm »

Unjam my MG and open fire at the greens!
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Komra

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Re: Roll To Redshirt
« Reply #448 on: February 01, 2013, 05:21:40 pm »

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But you never see a movie where a terrible coal plant accident causes a horrible devastation, do you? Nope, everyone seems to think that nuclear plants get their energy by smacking live atomic warheads all day or something.

Fireiy

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Re: Roll To Redshirt
« Reply #449 on: February 01, 2013, 09:49:27 pm »

Respawn and scout around.
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