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[Maldevious]

31. Invent a rules system with numerous resource types, troop types, city improvements, terrain modifiers, combat bonuses, and tables for rolls. Draw a 200x200 hex map that will accommodate 10 players. Abandon game after one turn.

[Lillipad]

Might as well post a few horrible things I know I've done.

32. If you have a general idea of how you would do every branching path you offer, heavily recommend the path you like best to the players, that's not railroading at all.
33. If things aren't progressing fast enough, totally Deus ex Machina the game into the future when your characters have super powers.
34. If you're going to have a game functioning more on RP and politics than combat, you should definitely come up with an intricate skill system for combat that will rarely, if ever be used.

[Thecard]

35. Man, your game is so fucking fun, you should make yourself a character.

36. Y'know what?  Your character shouldn't ever die.  That wouldn't be fair to anyone!

[Harry Baldman]

37. Humiliate your players for the amusement of yourself and nobody else. As long as you're having fun, right?

38. RTD Tip: Update ten seconds after a player posts, otherwise players will immediately abandon you. If other people can't quite match the speed of more proactive players, that's their own fault. The world belongs to the quick and you can't have people slacking on the job game.

[miauw62]

Hey, i like the fast-pacedness, it just doesn't lend too well to linear timelines and teamwork.

[vadia]

I think people who call Old Man Henderson's GM bad don't quite realize that all that crazy stuff he does - the GM allows all that.

Anyway;

29. Take your time updating your game. The players won't mind gaps of months between turns at all.

First point: Precisely!

Second point:

It sounded like a good time for all (including those reading about omh) -- so hey, seems like he did pretty good. to me

[TCM]

39. Each character's lifespan should be based upon how much you personally like them.

40. Every race should have a definitive moral view on the world that's the same for each of it's billions of people. After all, roleplays are just a function for us to secretly outlet our latent racism.

41. Fuck players that try to kill through blood loss. You can't kill someone by severing their legs. Retards.

[Harry Baldman]

42. Wounds are too hard to keep reliable track of. Don't do it, man. Say it's "heroic spirit" or something.

[Lillipad]

42. Wounds are too hard to keep reliable track of. Don't do it, man. Say it's "heroic spirit" or something.

That's not necessarily a bad thing to do, though. If a complex wound system really doesn't add anything to the game, or even worse, if it takes more than it adds, then there isn't much point in having one. Would you prefer the PCs be able to act out a cliche and fight through the pain to victory, or would you prefer the PCs slump over into neat little pseudo-comas because their bodies have become too bruised to continue moving?

[TherosPherae]

43. When making a suggestion game, be sure to make it as complex as possible. Also make sure that every update has art of some sort - after all, the shiny things are more important than the story itself.

43b. Jump characters every three updates or so. Sticking with just one character (or group of characters) gets hella boring.

44. Flip your shit when your games don't have a reply within 15 minutes. This obviously means nobody likes them and warrants closing the thread.

45. Try to unify all your failed games into one massive timeline, then run yet another game in it. Rope in other people's games for extra fun!

46. Roll dice for everything. Make sure that every turn has a roll for each character to continue breathing and thinking. Make sure at least one of these is a SAN-based roll.

47. Be sure to hand out SAN penalties at every possible chance you get. After all, if the players are a bunch of lunatics, why shouldn't the characters be the same?

[vadia]

48.  Take any individual rule of bad gmmming and make that your example of what never to do ever [i.e. never roll dice --- EVER EVER or make sure to give 3 weeks between turns rather than 15 mins.
Most mistakes are good [or sometimes useful) ideas taken too far.

[Maldevious]

49. Use bad grammar and punctuation. Always a good idea.

[Harry Baldman]

That's not necessarily a bad thing to do, though. If a complex wound system really doesn't add anything to the game, or even worse, if it takes more than it adds, then there isn't much point in having one. Would you prefer the PCs be able to act out a cliche and fight through the pain to victory, or would you prefer the PCs slump over into neat little pseudo-comas because their bodies have become too bruised to continue moving?

50. Include a wound system that is more complex than a medical textbook, yet is still completely unrealistic.

51. Base the entirety of your humor on "clever" pop culture references. Use every meme that you know of.

[JWNoctis]

52. Split your players into multiple groups temporally separated in the same reality for extended realworld time, so you're actually running two games at once, and can just wait for temporal paradoxes in stories where such things are not supposed to happen, or have yourself burnt out from the workload timed n-times.

53. Implement a hit location table so lengthy that a d100 is barely appropriate.

[terkiey]

54. Don't tell your players what is around them.