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[fortydayweekend]

"Boy, I probably should stop mixing everything with guts and deep-frying it in lard!" - said no dwarf cook ever.

Yeah and they don't even put mustard or ketchup on it, the barbarians..

[nekoexmachina]

"Boy, there is an ammo stockpile with bins. May be some good ol' bolts hide in there?" - said no dwarf for last couple of years.

[Henny]

"Why the hell are you wearing all that dwarf bone, nail and hair stuff?"

[misko27]

"I don't trust the lever they just added to my room."

[blazing glory]

"I don't trust the lever they just added to my room."

I did that

oh I'm distrustful of why the overseer is so eager for me to pull the lever - said no noble ever

[Thief]

We should save all the booze. Said no dwarf ever

[PDF urist master]

there's a cage trap with webs on top. maybe it won't catch me when i go over it.

[SixOfSpades]

Nomal Idstinthad, Furnace Operator: "Hey, bookkeeper. I'm supposed to smelt some steel. How many pounds of limestone have our miners unearthed in the last 5 minutes?"
Sibrek Fidokang, Bookkeeper: "How the hell should I know?"

Cog Stinthadavuz, Cat Collector: "Bookkeeper!! I just heard that one of my cats has died! Please can you tell me exactly where in the fort he is!?!"
Sibrek Fidokang, Bookkeeper: "How the hell should I know?"

Sibrek Fidokang, Bookkeeper: "Ooooh! Did somebody just drop a sock, 30 layers above us and on the other side of the map?"
Kogan Tekkudsarvesh, Hauler: "How the hell should I know?"

Ezum Urdimlam, duke: "I wanted to send the Mountainhome some nice gem-encrusted waterskins this year, but unfortunately our jeweler died of old age last month. I've decided that you, Urist Abanber, should replace him. Now go to his workshop, and cut, facet, & polish some prase opals."
Urist Abanber, Peasant: "I have absolutely no idea how to do that."
(Ezum Urdimlam fiddles with Urist Abanber's allowed labors)
Urist Abanber, Peasant: "I still have absolutely no idea how to do that."

[Vyro]

Egdoth Thebilmamot, Peasant: "This is suspicious! Why do me, a lowly peasant who has just migrated here, has no jobs allowed other than weaponsmithing me has no slightest idea about? Why do all females I pass by avert their eyes and males pat my shoulder with a solemn expression? Why both are calling me "Prototype B" behind my back? Why is there a volcanic golemforge out there with my name painted over it in red capitals? What is a bin full of steel gizmos and a longsword sticking out of it is doing laying on top of it? Wait a second, it's starting to come together! They want to turn me into one of those new senseless killing engines which are the dwarven equivalent of a dreadnought and whose only sound they can produce is a metal-muffled "BLOOOD!!!" bellow (which serves the sole purpose to somehow signify the thing is mighty angry and someone should get the heck off the lawn). Do not want!"
'Terminator' Egdoth Thebilmamot, Prototype B Swordgolem: "I HAVE AWOKEN".
Reksas Ceshfotrelon, Weaponsmith: Here, have some more of these delish gabbro mechanisms!"
Kel Oslansub, Peasant: "I have no hands and I am bloody annoying! I'll save the overseer some time and effort and go throw myself into the volcano!"

[Fairawen]

"Oooh, look at that menacing looking green/red/purple cloud! I definitely shouldn't waltz into that. I'll just stand here and wait 'til it passes."

[PlayingGood]

"I live for long patrol duties!"

"hey? Maybe someone up there in the clouds is getting really fucking frustrated with my lack of comprehension of how to do the simplistic shit."

"No No no! Candy thread is ONLY used for important stuff! Not artifact buckets and doctors suturing!"

"Wait, i just dumped a 100 stones in that same spot..."

"This migrant never eats, sleeps, drinks booze, has large fangs, dabbles in every job known to dwarfdom, HEY THIS MIGHT BE A VAMPIRE!"

"No. Lowing that bridge onto our corpses and refuse will not make it disappear, dipshit."

[Henny]

"I will gladly oblige to selling my artifact, so that others across the world may revel in its glory!"

[nekoexmachina]

- I demand no changes in furniture of my rooms ever!
Said no noble dorf.

[Roostre]

"Oh crap, that guy's on fire!"

[Vyro]

Expedition leader: "Anuscaves. Anus-caves. Really?.. Now who out of you six idiots came up with this one? You realize we'll all go down in history under that title, right? And what's gonna be next, Fiery Loins?"
Militia commander: "Oh! Me like it actually!"