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Author Topic: Damn Wrestlers.  (Read 2358 times)

Argonnek

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Damn Wrestlers.
« on: December 16, 2012, 06:50:21 pm »
The first legendary wrestler in this fort got to where he is by wrestling an echidna woman for months. Or should I say "wrestling?"

"The Elite Wrestler grabs The Echidna Woman by the upper body with his right hand!" (x30)

I can't help but think that he's less a legendary wrestler and more of a legendary perv.
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Urist McLaptop

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Re: Damn Wrestlers.
« Reply #1 on: December 16, 2012, 06:55:33 pm »
O.o.....dwarfs are weird........but I like his thinking lol
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Legend tells of a fort besieged by a dragon. When 79 brave recruits fell to its breath, the last dwarf of the fort took up arms. He sprung from his sickbed and claimed an adamant one sword before he bulrushes the dragon. A clean swipe severs the head. But the dragon claws him in the lower body and burns him alive. As he melts into a pile of booze and fat, I rename him Ronnie James Dio and change his profession to dragonslayer. He will forever be immortalized and worshipped as a dragonslayer God.

Gavakis

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Re: Damn Wrestlers.
« Reply #2 on: December 16, 2012, 07:01:21 pm »
dat beastialty.
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Argonnek

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Re: Damn Wrestlers.
« Reply #3 on: December 16, 2012, 07:33:59 pm »
Oh, hey it gets better. He's a Milker.

The mental images... They burns usssss....
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Loud Whispers

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Re: Damn Wrestlers.
« Reply #4 on: December 16, 2012, 08:24:21 pm »
Advanced military... Advances.
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Urist McLaptop

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Re: Damn Wrestlers.
« Reply #5 on: December 17, 2012, 09:04:16 am »
Lol
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Legend tells of a fort besieged by a dragon. When 79 brave recruits fell to its breath, the last dwarf of the fort took up arms. He sprung from his sickbed and claimed an adamant one sword before he bulrushes the dragon. A clean swipe severs the head. But the dragon claws him in the lower body and burns him alive. As he melts into a pile of booze and fat, I rename him Ronnie James Dio and change his profession to dragonslayer. He will forever be immortalized and worshipped as a dragonslayer God.

GiglameshDespair

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Re: Damn Wrestlers.
« Reply #6 on: December 17, 2012, 11:24:08 am »
Quote from: Argonnek on December 16, 2012, 06:50:21 pm
I can't help but think that he's less a legendary wrestler and more of a legendary perv.

Heh. Can I sig that? I find it oddly amusing.
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You fool. Don't you understand?
No one wishes to go on...

Dwarfotaur

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Re: Damn Wrestlers.
« Reply #7 on: December 17, 2012, 12:10:07 pm »
Man, I just tried to imagine sex in the style of a Dwarf Fortress combat log, the first thing I think off involves, "the severed part sails off in an arc!". Which ended that thought process abruptly.
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Urist McLaptop

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Re: Damn Wrestlers.
« Reply #8 on: December 17, 2012, 03:22:42 pm »
Oh God XD I love dwarf fortress!
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Legend tells of a fort besieged by a dragon. When 79 brave recruits fell to its breath, the last dwarf of the fort took up arms. He sprung from his sickbed and claimed an adamant one sword before he bulrushes the dragon. A clean swipe severs the head. But the dragon claws him in the lower body and burns him alive. As he melts into a pile of booze and fat, I rename him Ronnie James Dio and change his profession to dragonslayer. He will forever be immortalized and worshipped as a dragonslayer God.

pisskop

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Re: Damn Wrestlers.
« Reply #9 on: December 17, 2012, 03:24:43 pm »
Is Toady in the works for helping wrestlers wrestle to kill?  Or at least to maim and not grope?
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Pisskop's Reblancing Mod - A C:DDA Mod to make life a little (lot) more brutal!
drealmerz7 - pk was supreme pick for traitor too I think, and because of how it all is and pk is he is just feeding into the trollfucking so well.
PKs DF Mod!

ledgekindred

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Re: Damn Wrestlers.
« Reply #10 on: December 17, 2012, 03:44:45 pm »
One word:

OUCH

Spoiler (click to show/hide)
This is an echidna.  Even though I think they are cute as the dickens, I would not grab it over and over.
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Quote from: Starhero on February 11, 2012, 10:31:23 am
I don't understand, though that is about right with anything DF related.
Quote from: Kestrel on April 23, 2011, 08:12:44 pm
I just hope he dies the same death that all dwarfs deserve: liver disease.
The legend of Reg: http://www.bay12forums.com/smf/index.php?topic=65866.0
Atir Stigildegel, Legless Hero of Diamondrelic: http://www.bay12forums.com/smf/index.php?topic=83136.0

Urist McLaptop

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Re: Damn Wrestlers.
« Reply #11 on: December 17, 2012, 05:34:44 pm »
The way he was grabiing it there were no spikes on the chest >.>
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Legend tells of a fort besieged by a dragon. When 79 brave recruits fell to its breath, the last dwarf of the fort took up arms. He sprung from his sickbed and claimed an adamant one sword before he bulrushes the dragon. A clean swipe severs the head. But the dragon claws him in the lower body and burns him alive. As he melts into a pile of booze and fat, I rename him Ronnie James Dio and change his profession to dragonslayer. He will forever be immortalized and worshipped as a dragonslayer God.

Loud Whispers

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Re: Damn Wrestlers.
« Reply #12 on: December 17, 2012, 05:35:56 pm »
Well then, the conundrum is solved. The wrestler was simply engaging a hostile in the method that resulted in less blood loss.

And you guys called the poor victim a perv :<
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Drazinononda

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Re: Damn Wrestlers.
« Reply #13 on: December 17, 2012, 06:03:10 pm »
My sister studies jiu-jitsu (predictably, as the only girl in the class) and stuff like that is how I imagine pretty much every spar goes.

EDIT: that sounds bad, I realized. She's my sister in law, and after she humiliates the guys by beating them (despite being only about five feet and 120lbs) they don't mess with her more than they have to.
« Last Edit: December 17, 2012, 06:04:52 pm by Drazinononda »
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Quote from: Toady One on October 06, 2012, 07:00:07 am
Children you rescue shouldn't behave like rabid beasts.  I guess your regular companions shouldn't act like rabid beasts either.
Quote from: expwnent on June 18, 2013, 10:38:07 pm
I think that's a little more impossible than I'm likely to have time for.

Argonnek

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Re: Damn Wrestlers.
« Reply #14 on: December 17, 2012, 07:20:39 pm »
Quote from: GiglameshDespair on December 17, 2012, 11:24:08 am
Quote from: Argonnek on December 16, 2012, 06:50:21 pm
I can't help but think that he's less a legendary wrestler and more of a legendary perv.

Heh. Can I sig that? I find it oddly amusing.
Feel free.
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