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[GreatWyrmGold]

Sue God for contempt of court due to stacking the jury^{1[/sup, prove that he forged the evidence showing the Serpent's bribery2, child neglect and abuse3, various other forms of neglect4, and of course punishing people for not picking one arbitrary set of beliefs5. Also point out that "I Am God" just makes him more responsible for the results of his actions, as He would know exactly what would happen and could fix it with practically zero effort.}

Spoiler: Footnotes (click to show/hide)

1: Seriously, Job was on there twice and there were WAY more than 9.
2: Since when did "Knowledge of Good and Evil" == "Earthly Pleasures"?
3: The Tree of the Knowledge of Good and Evil was left completely unguarded. In addition, if the Tree gave Adam and Eve the Knowledge of Good and Evil, they couldn't have known right and wrong beforehand. Moreover, he made the Serpent, which told Eve to eat and share the fruit. Even if He didn't make it, He made what made it, and regardless His omniscience means He has no excuse for not seeing that coming. It's like leaving a poisoned glass of milk on the coffee table where a preschooler can reach it, telling him "NO." while pointing at it, then leaving the room and telling a neighborhood kid to tell the preschooler to drink it. And, since we're all Children of God, every tragedy to strike humanity is God neglecting humanity.
4: Since all humans, or at least all Christians⁶, are Children of God, God's omniscience allows him to know that they will happen, and His omnipotence lets Him stop them effortlessly, any tragedies to befall them are due to God's negligence. Also, the way God ignores almost all prayers--even refusing to give some sort of dream-sign or burning-bush-speech or oddly appropriate sermon or something most of the time--is also negligent.
5: To avoid sparking the wrath of the GM, I'll reduce this to two points: There is nothing suggesting that some kind of supreme intelligence was needed to make the Universe, and if human intelligence required a greater intelligence to create, where did the greater intelligence come from?
6: Why do Christians usually leave Jews and Muslims out of the title of "Children of God"?

Those were witnesses, not jury members. Also I'd rather not get into a humongus debate over sin, God and why he doesn't interfere. Also if I had rolled a 4,5, or 6, things would be different.

1. Oh.
2. Fine by me, but IC I'm still suing God.
3. I'd imagine. Here's hoping I do so--wait, what would have happened on a 3?

[Xantalos]

Sue God for contempt of court due to stacking the jury^{1[/sup, prove that he forged the evidence showing the Serpent's bribery2, child neglect and abuse3, various other forms of neglect4, and of course punishing people for not picking one arbitrary set of beliefs5. Also point out that "I Am God" just makes him more responsible for the results of his actions, as He would know exactly what would happen and could fix it with practically zero effort.}

Spoiler: Footnotes (click to show/hide)

1: Seriously, Job was on there twice and there were WAY more than 9.
2: Since when did "Knowledge of Good and Evil" == "Earthly Pleasures"?
3: The Tree of the Knowledge of Good and Evil was left completely unguarded. In addition, if the Tree gave Adam and Eve the Knowledge of Good and Evil, they couldn't have known right and wrong beforehand. Moreover, he made the Serpent, which told Eve to eat and share the fruit. Even if He didn't make it, He made what made it, and regardless His omniscience means He has no excuse for not seeing that coming. It's like leaving a poisoned glass of milk on the coffee table where a preschooler can reach it, telling him "NO." while pointing at it, then leaving the room and telling a neighborhood kid to tell the preschooler to drink it. And, since we're all Children of God, every tragedy to strike humanity is God neglecting humanity.
4: Since all humans, or at least all Christians⁶, are Children of God, God's omniscience allows him to know that they will happen, and His omnipotence lets Him stop them effortlessly, any tragedies to befall them are due to God's negligence. Also, the way God ignores almost all prayers--even refusing to give some sort of dream-sign or burning-bush-speech or oddly appropriate sermon or something most of the time--is also negligent.
5: To avoid sparking the wrath of the GM, I'll reduce this to two points: There is nothing suggesting that some kind of supreme intelligence was needed to make the Universe, and if human intelligence required a greater intelligence to create, where did the greater intelligence come from?
6: Why do Christians usually leave Jews and Muslims out of the title of "Children of God"?

Those were witnesses, not jury members. Also I'd rather not get into a humongus debate over sin, God and why he doesn't interfere. Also if I had rolled a 4,5, or 6, things would be different.

1. Oh.
2. Fine by me, but IC I'm still suing God.
3. I'd imagine. Here's hoping I do so--wait, what would have happened on a 3?

Wait, why are you suing my IC husband?

[Persus13]

Sue God for contempt of court due to stacking the jury^{1[/sup, prove that he forged the evidence showing the Serpent's bribery2, child neglect and abuse3, various other forms of neglect4, and of course punishing people for not picking one arbitrary set of beliefs5. Also point out that "I Am God" just makes him more responsible for the results of his actions, as He would know exactly what would happen and could fix it with practically zero effort.}

Spoiler: Footnotes (click to show/hide)

1: Seriously, Job was on there twice and there were WAY more than 9.
2: Since when did "Knowledge of Good and Evil" == "Earthly Pleasures"?
3: The Tree of the Knowledge of Good and Evil was left completely unguarded. In addition, if the Tree gave Adam and Eve the Knowledge of Good and Evil, they couldn't have known right and wrong beforehand. Moreover, he made the Serpent, which told Eve to eat and share the fruit. Even if He didn't make it, He made what made it, and regardless His omniscience means He has no excuse for not seeing that coming. It's like leaving a poisoned glass of milk on the coffee table where a preschooler can reach it, telling him "NO." while pointing at it, then leaving the room and telling a neighborhood kid to tell the preschooler to drink it. And, since we're all Children of God, every tragedy to strike humanity is God neglecting humanity.
4: Since all humans, or at least all Christians⁶, are Children of God, God's omniscience allows him to know that they will happen, and His omnipotence lets Him stop them effortlessly, any tragedies to befall them are due to God's negligence. Also, the way God ignores almost all prayers--even refusing to give some sort of dream-sign or burning-bush-speech or oddly appropriate sermon or something most of the time--is also negligent.
5: To avoid sparking the wrath of the GM, I'll reduce this to two points: There is nothing suggesting that some kind of supreme intelligence was needed to make the Universe, and if human intelligence required a greater intelligence to create, where did the greater intelligence come from?
6: Why do Christians usually leave Jews and Muslims out of the title of "Children of God"?

Those were witnesses, not jury members. Also I'd rather not get into a humongus debate over sin, God and why he doesn't interfere. Also if I had rolled a 4,5, or 6, things would be different.

1. Oh.
2. Fine by me, but IC I'm still suing God.
3. I'd imagine. Here's hoping I do so--wait, what would have happened on a 3?

Wait, why are you suing my IC husband?

??

Sue God for contempt of court due to stacking the jury^{1[/sup, prove that he forged the evidence showing the Serpent's bribery2, child neglect and abuse3, various other forms of neglect4, and of course punishing people for not picking one arbitrary set of beliefs5. Also point out that "I Am God" just makes him more responsible for the results of his actions, as He would know exactly what would happen and could fix it with practically zero effort.}

Spoiler: Footnotes (click to show/hide)

1: Seriously, Job was on there twice and there were WAY more than 9.
2: Since when did "Knowledge of Good and Evil" == "Earthly Pleasures"?
3: The Tree of the Knowledge of Good and Evil was left completely unguarded. In addition, if the Tree gave Adam and Eve the Knowledge of Good and Evil, they couldn't have known right and wrong beforehand. Moreover, he made the Serpent, which told Eve to eat and share the fruit. Even if He didn't make it, He made what made it, and regardless His omniscience means He has no excuse for not seeing that coming. It's like leaving a poisoned glass of milk on the coffee table where a preschooler can reach it, telling him "NO." while pointing at it, then leaving the room and telling a neighborhood kid to tell the preschooler to drink it. And, since we're all Children of God, every tragedy to strike humanity is God neglecting humanity.
4: Since all humans, or at least all Christians⁶, are Children of God, God's omniscience allows him to know that they will happen, and His omnipotence lets Him stop them effortlessly, any tragedies to befall them are due to God's negligence. Also, the way God ignores almost all prayers--even refusing to give some sort of dream-sign or burning-bush-speech or oddly appropriate sermon or something most of the time--is also negligent.
5: To avoid sparking the wrath of the GM, I'll reduce this to two points: There is nothing suggesting that some kind of supreme intelligence was needed to make the Universe, and if human intelligence required a greater intelligence to create, where did the greater intelligence come from?
6: Why do Christians usually leave Jews and Muslims out of the title of "Children of God"?

Those were witnesses, not jury members. Also I'd rather not get into a humongus debate over sin, God and why he doesn't interfere. Also if I had rolled a 4,5, or 6, things would be different.

1. Oh.
2. Fine by me, but IC I'm still suing God.
3. I'd imagine. Here's hoping I do so--wait, what would have happened on a 3?

Probably you and God get locked in a court battle for years to come. A 1 would have resulted in your incineration or something.

[Xantalos]

YAFB. Don't ask.

[GreatWyrmGold]

Sue God for contempt of court due to stacking the jury^{1[/sup, prove that he forged the evidence showing the Serpent's bribery2, child neglect and abuse3, various other forms of neglect4, and of course punishing people for not picking one arbitrary set of beliefs5. Also point out that "I Am God" just makes him more responsible for the results of his actions, as He would know exactly what would happen and could fix it with practically zero effort.}

Spoiler: Footnotes (click to show/hide)

1: Seriously, Job was on there twice and there were WAY more than 9.
2: Since when did "Knowledge of Good and Evil" == "Earthly Pleasures"?
3: The Tree of the Knowledge of Good and Evil was left completely unguarded. In addition, if the Tree gave Adam and Eve the Knowledge of Good and Evil, they couldn't have known right and wrong beforehand. Moreover, he made the Serpent, which told Eve to eat and share the fruit. Even if He didn't make it, He made what made it, and regardless His omniscience means He has no excuse for not seeing that coming. It's like leaving a poisoned glass of milk on the coffee table where a preschooler can reach it, telling him "NO." while pointing at it, then leaving the room and telling a neighborhood kid to tell the preschooler to drink it. And, since we're all Children of God, every tragedy to strike humanity is God neglecting humanity.
4: Since all humans, or at least all Christians⁶, are Children of God, God's omniscience allows him to know that they will happen, and His omnipotence lets Him stop them effortlessly, any tragedies to befall them are due to God's negligence. Also, the way God ignores almost all prayers--even refusing to give some sort of dream-sign or burning-bush-speech or oddly appropriate sermon or something most of the time--is also negligent.
5: To avoid sparking the wrath of the GM, I'll reduce this to two points: There is nothing suggesting that some kind of supreme intelligence was needed to make the Universe, and if human intelligence required a greater intelligence to create, where did the greater intelligence come from?
6: Why do Christians usually leave Jews and Muslims out of the title of "Children of God"?

Those were witnesses, not jury members. Also I'd rather not get into a humongus debate over sin, God and why he doesn't interfere. Also if I had rolled a 4,5, or 6, things would be different.

1. Oh.
2. Fine by me, but IC I'm still suing God.
3. I'd imagine. Here's hoping I do so--wait, what would have happened on a 3?

Probably you and God get locked in a court battle for years to come. A 1 would have resulted in your incineration or something.

Good to know and well, duh.

[TopHat]

Shoot out dungeon lock.
Head to storage area.
Make sure bunker is nuke- and antimatter- proof.

[Tavik Toth]

Find someone else to be leader. Go with as many people who want to go with me on a spaceship to a diffrent solar system. With a wormhole.

[Persus13]

>Respawn.

Sure

Sue God for contempt of court due to stacking the jury¹, prove that he forged the evidence showing the Serpent's bribery², child neglect and abuse³, various other forms of neglect⁴, and of course punishing people for not picking one arbitrary set of beliefs⁵. Also point out that "I Am God" just makes him more responsible for the results of his actions, as He would know exactly what would happen and could fix it with practically zero effort.

Spoiler: Footnotes (click to show/hide)

1: Seriously, Job was on there twice and there were WAY more than 9.
2: Since when did "Knowledge of Good and Evil" == "Earthly Pleasures"?
3: The Tree of the Knowledge of Good and Evil was left completely unguarded. In addition, if the Tree gave Adam and Eve the Knowledge of Good and Evil, they couldn't have known right and wrong beforehand. Moreover, he made the Serpent, which told Eve to eat and share the fruit. Even if He didn't make it, He made what made it, and regardless His omniscience means He has no excuse for not seeing that coming. It's like leaving a poisoned glass of milk on the coffee table where a preschooler can reach it, telling him "NO." while pointing at it, then leaving the room and telling a neighborhood kid to tell the preschooler to drink it. And, since we're all Children of God, every tragedy to strike humanity is God neglecting humanity.
4: Since all humans, or at least all Christians⁶, are Children of God, God's omniscience allows him to know that they will happen, and His omnipotence lets Him stop them effortlessly, any tragedies to befall them are due to God's negligence. Also, the way God ignores almost all prayers--even refusing to give some sort of dream-sign or burning-bush-speech or oddly appropriate sermon or something most of the time--is also negligent.
5: To avoid sparking the wrath of the GM, I'll reduce this to two points: There is nothing suggesting that some kind of supreme intelligence was needed to make the Universe, and if human intelligence required a greater intelligence to create, where did the greater intelligence come from?
6: Why do Christians usually leave Jews and Muslims out of the title of "Children of God"?

Spoiler: Counter to Footnotes (click to show/hide)

1. Job was there twice for a reason.
2. The serpent is Satan, and he was promising the current jury with Earthly Pleasures, not knowledge.
3. Adam and Eve didn't touch the tree until the Serpent showed up. God didn't exile them for eating from the tree of the Knowledge of Good and Evil, but the Serpent awakened a desire and curiosity out of Adam and Eve and God was concerned that they would eat from the other tree.
4. Well most of tragedy is caused by humans. God doesn't cause it. Christians believe that the crucifixion of Jesus provided salvation for us and will give all who believe it happened eternal life in heaven. In God's mind that more than makes up for tragedy.
5. Nothing was needed doesn't always mean something isn't there. I admit that this point I don't have all the answers to. And I doubt if I did I could articulate them into a coherent and understandable statement.
6. I was unaware Christians use the term Children of God.

(5) You sue. The judge turns out to be Richard Dawkins, and awards those in hell a bunch of money.

Make an antimatter bomb the size of the sun

(4) Okay.

Shoot out dungeon lock.
Head to storage area.
Make sure bunker is nuke- and antimatter- proof.

(2) You fail again.

Find someone else to be leader. Go with as many people who want to go with me on a spaceship to a diffrent solar system. With a wormhole.

(4) You hand off leadership to the Lancer, aka Onyxjew.
(6) You set off on the 1000 year journey with the wormhole in the cargo compartment of the ship.

[TopHat]

Repeat action

[Tavik Toth]

Use wormhole to speed up journey.

[Zanzetkuken The Great]

>Redirect Tavik's wormhole to the center of the sun.

[Onyxjew944]

Respawn with my Admiral Hat and Fleet.
Reconstruct pauldrons at proper size.
Enhance fleet

[Xantalos]

Toss antimatter bomb at Earth
Fly away

[GreatWyrmGold]

Spoiler: Replies (click to show/hide)

1. You had already mentioned that.
2. I don't recall any actual Biblical passages suggesting such. My point was that you were going against the Serpent's characterization in the Bible.
3. And where did the Serpent come from? Really, that's the issue.
4. Saying God didn't cause all that tragedy is like blaming the death of Roy Greenhilt on the ground rather than on Xykon--it's literally true, but the ultimate cause of it lay with God/Xykon's actions, that is destroying the zombie dragon and creating the Serpent respectively.
5. Again, I'd prefer not to get into a religious debate, but Occam's Razor.
6. Some do, at least.

Use the money to fund an effort to cover those flaming pits, evict the demons, install better management, and otherwise make Hell not a punishment to anyone who deserves it.

[Persus13]

Spoiler: Replies (click to show/hide)

1. You had already mentioned that.
2. I don't recall any actual Biblical passages suggesting such. My point was that you were going against the Serpent's characterization in the Bible.
3. And where did the Serpent come from? Really, that's the issue.
4. Saying God didn't cause all that tragedy is like blaming the death of Roy Greenhilt on the ground rather than on Xykon--it's literally true, but the ultimate cause of it lay with God/Xykon's actions, that is destroying the zombie dragon and creating the Serpent respectively.
5. Again, I'd prefer not to get into a religious debate, but Occam's Razor.
6. Some do, at least.

Use the money to fund an effort to cover those flaming pits, evict the demons, install better management, and otherwise make Hell not a punishment to anyone who deserves it.

Really, (as in I didn't know that) can you give an example of a denomination?