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Author Topic: The Black Cat Brewery and the Ill Tower: Where blood can be boiled down to iron.  (Read 16394 times)

Nyxalinth

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This is awesome. You draw quite well, too.  Keep at it!
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Nyxalinth likes the color blue, gaming, writing, art, cats for their aloofness,  Transformers for their sentience and ability to transform, and the Constructicons for their hard work and building skills. Whenever possible, she prefers to consume bacon cheeseburgers and pinot noir. She absolutely detests stupid people.

Nonsequitorian

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Psst.

Pssssst.

366 stanzas.

somewhere between 1800 and 2500 lines.

Psssssssssst.

at 40 lines a page, that's somewhere between 45 and 62 pages.

Is it epic yet?

If I do another 366 stanzas?

plz can I has epoch statiz

Nonsequitorian

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I'd update, but I can't for about a week because Karneval. Goin to Cologne for a couple days (though I go there practically every other week already.)

Nonsequitorian

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Re: The Black Cat Brewery, a Short Epoch Between 45 and 62 Pages Long.
« Reply #48 on: February 12, 2013, 11:17:41 am »

I'm sick today and don't have much to do. I feel like shit, but I had a pretty baller time so it's alright. [Insert something relatively sexual here.]

I'm not well enough to do a full piece, but I'll put something in.

The top stood above the clouds.
The humans, proud of their sea-side stone creation,
Held their ground for many years at that location,
But they'd appease goblin crowds.

They were pushed to western isles
Hundreds of miles from where they once had complete rule.
And although humans had ships, a powerful tool,
Goblins defended with smiles.

So then how did then men lose?
One can't excuse that the goblins were thousands strong,
For with such a fort, not much at all can go wrong.
Ramet's right hand held a ruse.

He, a snitch and a liar,
Ramet's friar stood by and whispered in his ear.
He inspired opulence and wastefulness and fear,
And to dig to hell's fire.

Esnodur came from within,
A mighty din resonated throughout the stones.
He let goblins as he sucked on human bones.
It became a place of sin.

An apple tree grew outside,
Close to the tide, but out of reach from the sea's waves.
A relic of Ramet and his sailors - now slaves -
An old testiment to pride.

The way I think of this place is like a dead wasteland that goes right to the sea. It's sandy, but it's not a beach or a typical desert. More like a badlands that hugs the ocean. For whatever reason, there are no plant life other than the apple tree.

The tower is extremely tall. The bottom is a deep blue like the sea, but as it gets taller and they started running out of paint, it gets lighter like the sky. It's more grey than blue at that point, because granite is grey. It's extremely wide, let's say 100 meters, only because the walls are silly thick themselves. The entire back is thinner, but it's also still really thick (I said a dinghy's girth, but that's probably a bit too big so that Ramet was pleased). The one spot in the back that's thin I'd still say is around a meter thick, so a cannon ball is still useless.

But I wouldn't talk about that if I didn't want the tower to fall :)

Nonsequitorian

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Re: The Black Cat Brewery, a Short Epoch Between 45 and 62 Pages Long.
« Reply #49 on: February 13, 2013, 12:51:42 pm »

Again here to say that no update today. I'm still sick, but after working I'm too tired really to get much out.


After having all of that said,
Maybe I should go move this thread.
I don't get much response,
And just my nonchalance
Keeps this damn thing from being dead.

Pan

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Re: The Black Cat Brewery, a Short Epoch Between 45 and 62 Pages Long.
« Reply #50 on: February 13, 2013, 11:16:03 pm »

Most people are probably in awe and speechless from the sheer magnificence of this  ;)

Though in all seriousness, I actually am not too sure what to say, other than tell you how great it is. So, personally, I just stalk this.
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Nonsequitorian

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Re: The Black Cat Brewery, a Short Epoch Between 45 and 62 Pages Long.
« Reply #51 on: February 14, 2013, 11:52:32 am »

I'm going to move this thread as a test to the other forum. If it doesn't do anything more, than I'll put it back here because I find here more fitting.

Esnodur was for them the best,
I don't just jest when I say for dwarves he'd be good.
Though he ate his soldiers and fingers, he still stood,
And fought harder than the rest.

"Bring me more wine and more swine,
For all is fine. What we have here's the strongest fort,
We'll be here for ages! For aeons! Guffaw! snort!
We'll stay till the stars align!

But that wasn't foreshadow,
Truly, there's no way they could have ever been moved
A million man siege with steel would've only proved
That the place could take a blow.

Esnodur watched time go by.
Fish swim, birds fly, and demons live forever,
But that isn't to say his plan wasn't clever,
He would just let the world die.

So the tower aged for years.
The clouds' fresh tears wet the paint, and so it grew gray.
The rays of the sun's hot gaze dried the paint away.
Thus the design became smears.

I have a really bad migrane and am gonna stop here after a couple again. I'll finish up this little bit in the next one, and then I'll start the next little bit too (or maybe I'll just go right into it and do the next little history bit as it comes up) I don't know.

I find it funny how what I called a chapter back when I started is now a "little history bit." Weee I've written a lot.

EDIT: When I get better, which should be soon, I AM going to give a full length update. I feel like I'm lagging behind, but I WILL give a real full length section.

Nonsequitorian

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Re: The Black Cat Brewery, a Short Epoch Between 45 and 62 Pages Long.
« Reply #52 on: February 17, 2013, 09:08:58 am »

"So then, where does that leave us?
Time can't greave us when we can't feel her passing through,
Though through new things we see change and we age, we do.
So then, where does time leave us?"

The tower wasn't actually present in this world when I made the Brewery, but it was the megaproject from another game. The walls were granite with cobaltite on the very outside. At somewhere around 10 levels, I just completely ran out of cobaltite and had to use the granite that was present. At some point I was sieged and just lost for whatever reason and thus the Goblins took it. I think the walls were only two blocks thick. It was a fun project, but I didn't ever get it large enough. Probably only around 20 levels total. It wasn't that big. It didn't have the weak spot either, it just had a bridge that didn't close properly :(.

So I'm going to just keep going with the story and I'll introduce the other history bits as the Bard (for whom we still have no name) discovers/feels like telling them.

Straight off we went to the nearest tavern:
The one in which we met the whaler crew,
A little place called just "Cańi's Cavern"

But the town around looked spackled and new.
Hung banners and spanners and flags, all blue.
Human royalty must be in an inn
We thought to tell them just where we have been.

It was the princess who was travelling
No king or queen or duke or lord or count.
Something big surely was unraveling.

A man brought us to the lass to recount.
She, found by goblins of extreme amount,
Was left alive due to midgets of wit.
She was extremely pleased, she did admit.

While the other dwarves went back to the bar,
Morül and I stayed to tell the sweet dame
Of our long journey and just who we are.

Morül, strange enough, didn't seem the same.
I realized quick what was true his aim.
He'd known her before and had fallen then.
He was in love with the princess of men.

Her glances back said I was unneeded,
So I too went back for a bit of wine.
I'm not sure what thereafter proceeded.

The next day the weather was fast divine,
And painful, for the sun shine was malign.
But we packed up our stuff for our next trip.
To beat the headaches, we all took a sip.

"So then. Where we goin?" All of us asked.
"We are going somewhere, dwarves, are we not?
At least with seeing the pig are we tasked."

"Sure, but that's it." Morül did this a lot
He'd say he was out, then Vath would get hot,
Then Damor would tie us back together.
It always hurt, moreso with that weather.


Not too much, but I'm done for now. I'm still a bit under the weather. I have a feeling that I'm going to get really sick pretty soon due to being with somebody with some really bad cough. Maybe not, but I don't know.

Umune

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Re: The Black Cat Brewery, a Short Epoch Between 45 and 62 Pages Long.
« Reply #53 on: February 18, 2013, 12:34:45 am »

This is spectacular - keep up the amazing work! You should consider bundling it together at some point, hell, I might buy it if you made a book (and you keep it up, as formerly-tacitly assumed).
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Nonsequitorian

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Re: The Black Cat Brewery, a Short Epoch Between 45 and 62 Pages Long.
« Reply #54 on: February 18, 2013, 02:18:38 am »

Yeah, I was planning on bundling it up and doing some general editing relatively soon because I have friends who wanted to read it and I didn't feel like just sending them the link.

Thank you very much, though. It means a lot to me when people like what I do.

Nonsequitorian

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Re: The Black Cat Brewery, a Short Epoch Between 45 and 62 Pages Long.
« Reply #55 on: February 22, 2013, 01:10:28 pm »

Man, I'm really sorry I haven't had the time. Just got bogged down from work after having not worked for a long time. I like to think I update this more than sporadically, like I used to, but it's just hard. I will update more than weekends.

I promise.

But I just can't tonight: I'm going to a party.

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Re: The Black Cat Brewery, a Short Epoch Between 45 and 62 Pages Long.
« Reply #56 on: February 24, 2013, 07:08:14 am »

Esnodur's Hunger


The path ahead stayed for us strangely clear,
As in, not one thing wanted us all dead.
On a straight road, we let old Lokum steer.

Eyes squinted, slowly sighing, and bowed head,
On Thuveg's head-helping biscuits we fed.
After two weeks we smelt the salty air.
Within two more we saw it standing there.

I'm not sure how humans could build the thing.
It was as large as a small mountain hall.
I supose that's what they'll do for a king.

There were goblins about, but that's not all,
They were more than just guards guarding a wall.
Confident, we strolled to the fort's one door,
The only port of the fort on the shore.

We're taken in as soon as we were found,
But they had caught a glimpse of the token,
Thusly we were the most loved dwarves around.

Not with Esnodur, though, had we spoken.
It was fine though, no promises broken.
Instead we were brought to a king of sort,
Alone after a session in his court.

"Who might you be? Why should I let you live?"
His voice was high pitched and very whiny.
We told him of the info we would give.

His eyes looked at us, glossy and tiny
Beady and black and evil and shiny.
"You are looking for the pig, I take it?
Very well, but have fear when you wake it."

And so we were led to the deepest room,
Black but for the blood and the torches' flare.
Nothing I had seen had carried more gloom.

Esnodur shot us a long painful glare,
Though it was none, it was an empty stare.
His eyelids were gone along with his limbs.
I'm glad the chamber was shrouded in dims.

He gurgled out a laugh like none I'd heard.
"So you won, my bard. I knew you'd do it.
Can you do me just one favor?" He slurred.

I said I could, but I wouldn't, had I knew it.
I puke in my mouth when I construe it.
He was a demon but I was surprised
At the disgusting thing he had advised.

Yeah. Enough for now. Esnodur isn't going to live. Not like that's a bad thing, he /is/ a demon. The next part is going to be a little unsettling, I presume. Esnodur is related with eating and hunger. He's been tied up and held in a chamber without any way to feed himself, as he was probably the one who took off his own arms and legs (for food).

I think you can guess what his favor is.

Nonsequitorian

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Re: The Black Cat Brewery, a Short Epoch Between 45 and 62 Pages Long.
« Reply #57 on: March 03, 2013, 08:55:03 am »

If you don't like the idea of autocannibalism, just know that this whiny goblin is a really bad dude whom you should hate. He's the antagonist, and for
Spoiler (click to show/hide)
he is posessed by Oszom himself.

I took some old, hard bread out of my bag,
Before I could give it, a scathing noise:
The whiny goblin on a fowl stag.

"Please do exactly what he said, my boys.
You wouldn't keep him from what he enjoys?
Ok, my dwarvies, then do it or die,
I'm not touching him, no, no, no, not I."

I took out a knife,
To take way his life,
But not so that he would starve
With one long clean cut,
I opened his gut,
And his entrails did I carve

The young bard is dead,
What went through my head,
O, the young bard in me died
He begged for soom food
And so you conclude,
He ate what was once inside

"Kill him, dwarf!" He said,
As the pig had pled,
And I know not what to do.
I cut through his skull
And so he died full,
At the disgust of my crew.


The goblin guffawed with glee at the sight,
While my dwarven peers were shaking with fear
At my supposedly horrible spite.

"My bard, my friend..." Words rang in my ear,
But to me they were anything but clear.
"You didn't even hesitate nor flinch!
You took him down as if it were a cinch!"

"Well done, my son, now leave here forever."
That foul goblin looked down at us grinning,
His black beedy eyes ever so clever.

Next thing I know my head was still spinning,
A tonic with rum was Lokum thinning
Esnodur's symbol was gone from my chest,
But my damned sword cooked through my hand, at best.

I was afraid I'd never play a song,
For I could not move my palm without pain.
Yet I'm here today, so I'm gladly wrong.

The hurt was most anything but mundane,
And to this day I have the blackened stain.
The goblin was no friend of the late boar,
He had just defeated him in a war.

The army destoyed by ghosts up at Shrak
They were his troops, but his forces were great.
They made short work of the demon's attack.

"I'm sorry that you have had such a fate.
Please, though, for me, hang in there, training mate."
Morül helped me get up off of the ground.
I was glad to see just my friends around.

I could go on, but that's enogh for now. Going back to the whole character development stuff too, because we haven't heard anything from the crew (excluding Morül, who IS the leader). I'd like to go more into the other characters, because you can't really have a party without knowing what the hell they're doing. I like where this is going though. I like that the bard, who started out relatively innocent, is now becoming sort of a troubled fellow. He's not a fighter, but he's clearly got no limit when it comes to things like that.

As to why the sword burned his hand? Yeah well it's a special sword and that'll be gone into much more detail later. I've mentioned its peculiarity multiple times, but this is the first time he's killed anything with it (and also the first time we've seen a demon die).

Now I know that in Dwarf Fortress there's never just one demon coming out of hell, but I don't really like that mechanic. I feel like a demon is supposed to be more something along the lines of a god. Not a god, as he doesn't have any divine powers, but somebody who has extreme influence. A demon, in my mind, gets people to let them out by planting ideas in their heads. When the demon is released, no more come out. Just that one. This demon has a couple features that define him: Esnodur's being hunger and gluttony - which is why he died, Oszom being something along the lines of fire and insidiousness. Clearly Oszom was a more powerful demon, as a flaming jerk is more powerful than a fat ass who's always hungry.

There aren't more demons in my tale, however. Esnodur and Oszom were it. Both of them are dead, but neither of them are out of the story. Esnodur was the leader of one goblin civ and Oszom was the leader-to-be of the one that now owns the tower. Now were going to be going to some other civs, such as the elves (bluuuuh elves hippies bluhuhuhuh) and the humans (bluuuuh humans with ships huuhuhuhuhuh).

Nonsequitorian

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oh god I just realized how much of a twisted freak Esnodur was. I mean. Ew.

He's a pig who loves his own flesh so much that he gets pleasure out of chewing on his fingers. He eats like a pig, yes, but he also eats pigs. I mean, he eats his own arms and legs and leaves himself stranded in a chamber because he has now no way of moving. Sure, he would have died there, but I mean yuck. And then the whiny goblin gets pleasure out of getting the bard to help the sorry sod to eat himself to death.

I don't think Demons are sane people

WaffleEggnog

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Well, this is goddamn great. I would read the whole thing, but at this point it's more like a book than anything, and I'm sure its not socially acceptable to sit in front of a computer all day.

Any way, just letting you know this is one immence feat of badassery. You might even be able to get this published. I hope you do, this deserves all the attention it can get.

Keep up the good work guy.
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