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[FallingWhale]

Uranium isn't actually very radioactive, its decay is however, a chain reaction of death.

[Darkond2100]

I know this wikipedia article looks scary, but the process explained here is actually already done in DF. Without my chem labs, ceramics, and glaze design classes, this stuff'd freak me out too, so I'll try to dumb it down.
There's one other radioactive metal that occurs in high-ish quantities: thorium.
<Wikipediaquotestart> Thorium has been extracted chiefly from monazite through a complex multi-stage process. The monazite sand (Alright! So it'll be the only sand that we find down Deep!) is dissolved in hot concentrated sulfuric acid (H₂SO₄)(We have acid! Superheat it in a kiln with thorium!). Thorium is extracted as an insoluble residue into an organic phase containing an amine (We glaze design students often joke about adding bananas to glazes for potassium, because it's possible and very silly; add honey or fat!). Next it is separated or stripped using an ion such as nitrate, chloride, hydroxide, or carbonate, returning the thorium to an aqueous phase (Okay, so I don't quite understand what this means by "stripping", as it makes me think of paint thinner. But, nitrates, chlorides, and carbonates are all very common; they're necessary for creating precious and colorful gems.). Finally, the thorium is precipitated and collected.

Several methods are available for producing thorium metal: it can be obtained by reducing (reducing refers to heating in a fuel-fed reduction kiln, as opposed to an electric kiln where nothing is burned but things are still heated to very high temperatures (this would be more like cooking something in a pot over a fire, as it's not like you're smoking your stew, are ye?!))  thorium oxide with calcium, by electrolysis of anhydrous thorium chloride in a fused mixture of sodium and potassium chlorides, by calcium reduction of thorium tetrachloride mixed with anhydrous zinc chloride, and by reduction of thorium tetrachloride with an alkali metal. <endWikiquote>

That means "too much work". No thorium. (Thorium is much easier to brute-force process than uranium or plutonium. It's much more low-tech, and I admit to knowing nothing about it other than that it's processing is something that I could do in the kiln in my backyard. I have no idea what it could be used for, and I just might try to find out if I can get some cool glaze effects out of it)

MAD SCIENCE!

[GoombaGeek]

Thank you, educated people